It's so tough to be a celebrity – trust us on this one. Why just today it took us over 20 minutes to convince our grocery bagger that we were famous. He tried to act like he didn't even know what a blog was, and completely smudged out the quarter of an autograph we put on his arm real quick. When we saw him a little later whispering to his manager and pointing at us, well let's just say our fisherman's cap and gigantic sunnies weren't incognito enough. Immense fame is the toughest thing we've ever had to do.
That's why we can relate to the Jolie-Pitts. Everywhere they go, 1000 photographers are vying for the perfect shot. The Jolie-Pitt kids aren't even safe. The paparazzi want to cash in on their pictures too, even when their superstar parents are nowhere in sight.
In fact, another camera dragger was recently placed under citizens arrest for hopping a wall to do just that.
You read that right. An easily subdued member of the paparazzi recently hopped a wall to get a picture of four-year-old Maddox Jolie-Pitt. His famous folks had dropped him off at the Pacific Coast Highway preschool and went on their way. The photographer tried to get a picture, but he was placed under citizens arrest. Citizens arrest! That loosely translates to something like – an 18-year-old 'teacher' had to put down her little cup of snack time apple sauce, chase him down and keep him pinned till the cops showed. What a gaywad!
The photographer was Cliff Brewer, a 25-year-old who should really consider karate classes. He was booked for misdemeanor trespassing, but got out on $1000 bail. He's set to appear in court on the charges. Let's hope it goes well for him, as he'd likely not fare well as a prison monetary unit. Brad Pitt's security chief said of the whole fiasco:
"School officials and myself feel that some of these paparazzi are like predators who will recklessly take and sell photos of innocent children for money."
It wasn't so long ago that John Liebenberg was arrested in Namibia. He too was paparazzi trespassing to get a Jolie-Pitt kid pic. It seems, then, that a trend is being set.
It's not new, though. Why, 25 years ago when hecklerspray was swaddled up in gold-trimmed diapers, our mother the Queen had to put up with the same thing. It proved too much for our mother the Queen though, so she sold us to several Kuwaiti fur traders, who raised us with a strong work ethic and a mild distaste for Saddam.
One day though, when we rise from the ashes like a phoenix in that Harry Potter movie, and we rest our bottoms in the throne's butt groove as originally smooshed in by Henry VIII, it'll all be worth it. And to those 57 scientists that all proved we're lying in over 200 separate and completely substantiated biological tests, a royal memory is not one you'll like being purged in!
Read more:
Photographer Arrested Near Pitt-Jolie's Son's School – Reuters
[story by Shawn Lindseth]