Today,?the news that the world has been speculating about?for weeks was officially verified. No, Justin Bieber is not the true father of Kim Kardashian’s unborn child, and, no, Justin Timberlake has not been named honorary President of the World … though either one is perfectly feasible.
Today, it was finally confirmed that Jay Leno and his enormous jaw are?being replaced on?The Tonight Show by Jimmy Fallon and his cuteness.
Hopefully, that smug asshole Jay will stay gone this time. You may recall that he turned over the?The Tonight Show to Conan O’Brien in 2009 so he could host a primetime show … which sucked. So, in an unbelievably dickish move,?Jay went backsies on the deal and kicked?Conan to the curb.
Despite that distasteful stunt, many viewers stuck with Jay … and he still somehow kicks?David Letterman’s ass in ratings, despite the fact that Dave?has always been much?funnier. The Tonight Show also beats out Jimmy Kimmel’s far superior show in?recent ratings, which, since?moving to a competing time slot a few months ago,?has been gradually stealing Jay’s younger viewers … one of the main arguments for Jimmy Fallon’s Tonight Show takeover.
Not only is Jimmy?a fuck-load funnier (I’m referring to Fallon, though Kimmel is also accurate in this capacity), but if you’re under 60, he’s just more relevant. Plus, he’s friends with Tina Fey.