Jassson Deruuulo. Yes. Jason Derulo has been forced to cancel his worldwide tour after fracturing his neck during rehearsals because he’s just so damn talented at repeating his own name and, y’know, being a massive raving secret lemonade drinker.
Jassson Deruuulo. That’s right. According to various reports, the not-at-all-closeted singing sensation was attempting some kind of acrobatic move when he landed directly on his neck and suffered an acute fracture of his vertebra.
Jassson Deruuulo. That’s not good is it? Unless you find people’s misfortune funny. Like we do.
Jassson Deruuulo. He informed his fans of his accident on Twitter and Facebook by posting a very funny picture of himself sporting a fetching neck brace with the message:
“I fractured my neck doing tumbling & acrobatics 4 tour! Always tryin 2 push boundaries 4 YOU! Like my new chain? ;),”
Jassson Deruuulo. Derulo and Warner Bros Records have since issued a statement regarding his injury, stating:
“To all my fans who planned to come to the ‘Future History’ world tour, the pain of letting you down cuts me way deeper than this injury I’ve sustained.
“My fans mean everything to me, so I’m praying for a speedy recovery in order to perform for you in the near future,”
Jassson Deruuulo. Praying? That will do you no good at all. You may as well write a list to the universe and cross the fingers of a rubber hand. God doesn’t exist Jason. You do. Oh my, you exist alright.
Jassson Deruuulo. Anyway, he won’t be singing his substandard nursery-rhyme RnB any time soon because he’ll be wincing in pain every single time someone taps him on the shoulder for the japes. He’s probably in huge amounts of agony right now.
Jassson Deruuulo. Would you help him to the toilet? Men applicants only we understand.