Celebrityland can often be a turbulent place, with all sorts of crazy stuff going on. For the humble person, it can sometimes be difficult to work out if it's the PR machine going in to overdrive to drum up some publicity or it's just a fake story designed to get idiots like us to report it.
We only write the truth and nothing but the hardcore facts.
At times, it seems that the line can be blurred from those famous folk who so badly crave our attention, that?ll they go to any lengths to gain it. Unless you happen to be a teenage girl, we assume you won't know who Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are. In short, they are both stars of MTV?s horribly staged reality show, The Hills. The program may have finished, but their real lives resemble nothing more than a terrible sitcom that wouldn't even be screened on BBC Three.
Reality shows and romances are never recipes for happily ever after. We only have to look at Peter Andre and Katie Price from I'm A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here and any of the plebs from Big Brother to realise that TV relationships don't last.
But those desperate for everlasting fame don't care about this, even when things go wrong.
The pair originally married in April 2009 in a ceremony which we can only imagine being the worse thing on Earth. Filled with posers and woman competing with each to see who can show the most amount of teat, it wouldn't be your traditional wedding ceremony. Sadly, this fairytale romance wasn?t to last with the pair splitting up in June and lodging divorce papers in July.
But what could have caused such a happy marriage to tarnish? Even though we're not trained marriage councillors, the ego of Heidi Montag might have got in the way. Already looking overly pampered, she decided to enhance her looks with some plastic surgery. Granted, a lot of people can afford to do this now, but not ten operations in a single day.
Somehow this seems slightly excessive as Montag attempts to become a living Barbie doll.
So how about Spencer? Surely he is the stable one in the relationship and tried his upmost to stabilize their love? He may have wanted to do that, but alas, he did it in the form of flogging the world a supposed sex tape of the pair.
Frankly, we can imagine better images.
Maybe we don't understand love because our sex doll only says three phrases. Perhaps one day we?ll develop that feeling called ?compassion? and have a gooey feeling when we see someone we love. Until then, we?ll restore our faith in humanity with these two goons.
Now Magazine reports Heidi Montag as saying:
?We have just gone through so much crazy stuff personally and through our jobs and everything, so for me this feels like our first real marriage.?
We?d love to end this article with a witty joke or punchline, but the emotion of it all has gotten to us. Parts of the rainforest need to be chopped down in order for more tissues to be delivered to us.
We can't stop blubbing.