Hobbit fans had better just put their stupid wizard gowns and Golem masks back in the closet ? Middle Earth is officially in turmoil.
Why? Because Hobbit director Guillermo Del Toro has quit as director of The Hobbit ? and Peter Jackson has already ruled out taking the reins.
Apparently, the constant delays caused by the financial woes at MGM have pissed Guillermo Del Toro off so much he has decided to walk.
These are, of course, delays that Jackson and De Toro had only acknowledged until recently. So officially De Toro is kind of quitting over nothing.
This is after already spending two years in New Zealand with WETA preparing to make the two-part film.
The news is a right pain in The Ring for LOTR fans, who apparently were looking forward to seeing more emaciated Mexican eye-hand monsters than in Tolkien?s original vision.
He was also seen as an ideal choice to replace Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson ? not because of his creative vision or anything like that, but because he looks exactly like Peter Jackson in a Bo Selecta mask.
But not now, after Del Toro decided he was sick of living in a Third World country or something. Well, you can't blame him. New Zealand may look pretty, but there is sod all to do. OK, we are making this bit up.
Speaking on The One Ring, Del Toro said: ?In light of ongoing delays in the setting of a start date for filming The Hobbit, I am faced with the hardest decision of my life.
?After nearly two years of living, breathing and designing a world as rich as Tolkien’s Middle Earth, I must, with great regret, take leave from helming these wonderful pictures. I remain grateful to Peter, Fran and Philippa Boyens, New Line and Warner Brothers and to all my crew in New Zealand. I've been privileged to work in one of the greatest countries on earth with some of the best people ever in our craft and my life will be forever changed. The blessings have been plenty, but the mounting pressures of conflicting schedules have overwhelmed the time slot originally allocated for the project. Both as a co-writer and as a director, I wish the production nothing but the very best of luck and I will be first in line to see the finished product. I remain an ally to it and its makers, present and future, and fully support a smooth transition to a new director.?
Del Toro will, however, continue to co-write the screenplays with Fran Walsh, Jackson and Phillipa Boyens. But those hoping producer Jackson would step up to the plate are in for some bad news (although we did mention it in the second sentence). Jackson’s manager Ken Kamins said:
?Peter has and has had obligations and commitments to other films that would make it impossible for him to direct The Hobbit at this time, even if it was offered, which it hasn’t been.?
Mind you, Jackson is half the man he used to be, literally.
Meanwhile, Jackson added the usual crap you see at the end of press releases.
He said: ?We feel very sad to see Guillermo leave The Hobbit, but he has kept us fully in the loop and we understand how the protracted development time on these two films, due to reasons beyond anyone’s control, has compromised his commitment to other long term projects.
?The bottom line is that Guillermo just didn’t feel he could commit six years to living in New Zealand, exclusively making these films, when his original commitment was for three years. Guillermo is one of the most remarkable creative spirits I’ve ever encountered and it has been a complete joy working with him.
?Guillermo’s strong vision is engrained into the scripts and designs of these two films, which are extremely fortunate to be blessed with his creative DNA.?
So is The Hobbit destined for Mount Doom? Well, in hecklerspray’s inexpert opinion: No chance, there’s too much money to be made to let it slip. Even if they have to get Michael bloody Bay to direct.
God, we have just thrown up in our mouths.
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