Holy crap, do we ever love the Eurovision Song Contest. We love it so much that we're lobbying Brussels decide the outcomes to all wars with Eurovision Song Contests, since we figure that's the quickest way to turn an entire continent into a nuclear wasteland.
Before we hold you down and fill you full of Eurovision betting odds, we have some big news about UK Eurovision hopefuls Scooch – they've been signed by a record label and their godawful Flying The Flag song is going to be released next month. But the really exciting thing is that the b-side of the single is going to be a karaoke version! That means that your children or any infant relative of yours has the chance to read the words "Would Sir like something to suck on?" on a big screen backed by cheap-sounding Europop. Finally!
Anyway, here comes today's Eurovision betting odds – for Bosnia & Herzegovina and Bulgaria – with help from Paddy Power…
Bosnia & Herzegovina (pop. 3,922,205; a mountainous country in the western Balkans); Maria Sestic, Rijeka Bez Imena
Now, for some reason we're a little way into these Eurovision betting odds and we've yet to come across that one everlasting Eurovision staple – the sexy girl. That sort of ends today, though, because Bosnia & Herzegovina are entering Maria Sestic into Eurovision, and at least she's sexier than the Princess Di vampire from Belarus. Maria Sestic is a 20-year-old piano professor and multi-award winning singer – and she's fairly cute too. However, the dimwit who thought that a dull Bosnian power ballad about a river ever stood a chance of winning Eurovision needs to be taken outside and kneecapped with immediate effect. Plus, any men who would have voted for Maria based on her cuteness are going to run a mile when they realise that she's basically singing a song about being a needy obsessive ex-girlfriend; translated into English she sings: "You are my pain/ you are my sorrow/ Just once more I want/ to hold you so tight/ like it's the last time/ and forever my tears I’ll cry." Yeesh. Current Eurovision betting odds – 66/1
Bulgaria (pop. 7,537,929; a republic in the southeast of Europe); Elitsa Todorova & Stoyan Yankoulov, Water
If you ever want a soundtrack to a short corporate film to play in the visitor's centre of your hydro-electric power plant, Elitsa Todorova & Stoyan Yankoulov are the kids for you. If you want a decent Eurovision song written and performed, probably not so much. Water by Elitsa Todorova & Stoyan Yankoulov is ridiculous – they're two drummers bashing away to what sounds like an Altern8 tape they stole from a visiting foreign exchange student 20 years ago while the lady drummer makes dolphin noises and a female angel with black wings flies around a bit. And if any Eurovision entry this year has worse lyrics – "would sir like something to suck on" notwithstanding – then we'll be astounded: "See this young lass there, eeeeee!/ See this young lass sing, eee!… There’s a young lad coming from the village, Mitra-lassiee, Mitra-lass/ Walking by his side’s a wild young pony, Mitra-lassiee, Mitra-lass." And the worst thing is, Elitsa Todorova & Stoyan Yankoulov have got insanely short Eurovision betting odds. What's wrong with this continent? Current Eurovision betting odds – 11/1
Tomorrow – Eurovision betting odds for Croatia & Cyprus! But if that's too long to wait – or you feel like making more money than you know what to do with – head right over to the Paddy Power Eurovision betting odds page to see the latest, and best, betting odds.
hoho says
HAHAHAH Will see at what place your stupid English song will be at the end. Last year England is “proudly” taking the last places:))0 So good luck,suckers!
Nikolle says
With regards to the author of this material.
Please close your ears, because people love this song. What you’ve written shows only your nerrow-minded opinion, see you at the finals :)))
medeamona says
To describe Elitca and Stoyan like this is a more than stupid! It is a pitty and shame for the one who wrote it!
Please, learn more about the music, learn more about the ancient culture, that Bulgarian artist present and then write.
Everything else is ignorance. And like hoho says: So good luck, suckers!
ivelina says
You are so stupid ! Elitsa and Stoian are the best !
ivelina says
Its BG folklor!You can’t say that it’s for hydro-electric company!
Stanislav Grozdanov says
This is the grateest song on Eurovision thi years!!!
Nick says
It’s obvious you have no idea about music:)))
As for the translation of lyrics, it’s merely ridiculous…………..
Stanislav Grozdanov says
I meanBulgarian song
Go6o says
You stuped Europian. Bulgaria and Bosna is not the same place!!!
Marg says
You / the little unimportant person who wrote those lines / are the biggest crap ever!!
you will need luck in your poor and pitiful performance! You can go and f* yourself somewere!
boris says
Well well well,the brain washed Britain spell shit all over again.
i wish luck for Elitsa and Stoian,and my opinion for what shes doing with her voice is for masterpiece.
and for the idiot who wrote the comments i wish more sunlight for his brain.
big hugs for alll bulgarians
Elena says
The Bulgarian song is beautiful, Elica and Stoyan are great artists! The author of this “material” should rather be more concerned about the Brittish performance and
getting rid of his/her inferiority complex. Poor one. Good luck!
Yordan says
Dear Sirs, I am PROUD TO BE BULGARIAN! And this song makes me proud to be BULGARIAN! Well, concerning the Author of this material, as well as all the others with the same oppinion I would like to kindly tell you that a wise man would never tell such stupid things about a culture and a nation FAR MORE GREATER than this of their own. I would like also to add that your innoncence is the thing that is ridiculous and funny. When we had here Golden Ages and were an educational, cultural, power and wisdom center in Europe, you were just some Barbarians hiding in caves. Well, well, and what can You sirs with your naive and rediculous comments tell US about Music, when we have such a national Music (yes, with a capital M) that is popular all over the world. Yes, and I remember when a big Jazz band from Western Europe came here and listened to our music and told – we can count up to four, and it was wisdon to tell this, because they liked the music, but did not understand the tact… Well, well, IT WAS ALWAYS IN HUMAN HISTORY THAT THINGS PEOPLE DID NOT UNDERSTAND WERE READILY ACKNOWLEDGED TO BE RIDICULOUS. LATER ON RIDICULOUS THINGS TURN OUT TO HAVE REVOLUTIONIZED THE WORLD…. AND SOMETHING MORE, DEAR SIRS, SOMETHING ABOUT CULTURE – MAYBE YOUR CULTURE IS WORLDWIDE SEEN IN YOUR STADIUMS – DRUNKARDS, GOING TO A FOOTBAL MATCH TO KILL, BEAT AND SO ON. POOR YOU. Yes, RIDICULOUS that YOU ARE TALKING TO US ABOUT CULTURE. REALLY RIDICULOUS. FUNNY.
MAYBE YOU HAVE GOT NO TASTE FOR GOOD MUSIC… OR JUST YOU NEED TO CLEAN YOUR YEARS. YES, YES, CLEAN YOUR YEARS OR BETTER GO TO A DOCTOR, BECAUSE YOUR YEARS CERTAINLY DO NEED A SPECIAL TREATMENT FOR PROPER MUSIC TASTE.
Loving Bulgaria,
And with good taste for ALL the good songs in Eurovision,
I wish WATER a GOOD LUCK!!!!!
Nick says
Mr Stuart Heritage,
You don’t know Bulgarian folklore!
Yordan says
Dear Sirs, I am PROUD TO BE BULGARIAN! And this song makes me proud to be BULGARIAN! Well, concerning the Author of this material, as well as all the others with the same oppinion I would like to kindly tell you that a wise man would never tell such stupid things about a culture and a nation FAR MORE GREATER than this of their own. I would like also to add that your innoncence is the thing that is ridiculous and funny. When we had here Golden Ages and were an educational, cultural, power and wisdom center in Europe, you were just some Barbarians hiding in caves. Well, well, and what can You sirs with your naive and rediculous comments tell US about Music, when we have such a national Music (yes, with a capital M) that is popular all over the world. Yes, and I remember when a big Jazz band from Western Europe came here and listened to our music and told – we can count up to four, and it was wisdon to tell this, because they liked the music, but did not understand the tact… Well, well, IT WAS ALWAYS IN HUMAN HISTORY THAT THINGS PEOPLE DID NOT UNDERSTAND WERE READILY ACKNOWLEDGED TO BE RIDICULOUS. LATER ON RIDICULOUS THINGS TURN OUT TO HAVE REVOLUTIONIZED THE WORLD…. AND SOMETHING MORE, DEAR SIRS, SOMETHING ABOUT CULTURE – MAYBE YOUR CULTURE IS WORLDWIDE SEEN IN YOUR STADIUMS – DRUNKARDS, GOING TO A FOOTBAL MATCH TO KILL, BEAT AND SO ON. POOR YOU. Yes, RIDICULOUS that YOU ARE TALKING TO US ABOUT CULTURE. REALLY RIDICULOUS. FUNNY.
MAYBE YOU HAVE GOT NO TASTE FOR GOOD MUSIC… OR JUST YOU NEED TO CLEAN YOUR YEARS. YES, YES, CLEAN YOUR YEARS OR BETTER GO TO A DOCTOR, BECAUSE YOUR YEARS CERTAINLY DO NEED A SPECIAL TREATMENT FOR PROPER MUSIC TASTE.
Loving Bulgaria,
And with good taste for ALL the good songs in Eurovision,
I wish WATER a GOOD LUCK!!!!!
christina says
The audience in the big European concert halls gives standing ovation to Bulgarian voices and do not need the translation of lyrics, which is also impossible, because English vocabulary is too scarce to express the herritage of the Balcans and Bulgaria in particular. Listen to the song in Bulgarian, no matter what English people imagine, their language is not a universal one, only music is. I have always wondered how a country and a nation could exist without folklore. Obviously, it is possible in the case of Britain… The only thing the author can do is to mock at things he will never be able to understand, because he lacks culture, knowledge and feeling. Let me just mention that Elitza and Stoyan are even more popular abroad than in Bulgaria, as they carry the magic of Bulgarian folklore to the rest of the world, bored by the uniform music of Western Europe.
Ivan says
Dear stupid-fuck Stuart Heritage…your article can be described only by the word ‘stupid’ …and as for you as a person…you’re nothing more than a stupid fuck…Did I said that before? So as a ignorant stupid fuck you should go..and well…fuck your stupid-self…somewhere in fuckland…Now we’re coming to the point when I’ll say that you’re a stupid fuck…Did I said that before..or did I said it before?
We had a culture in Bulgaria long before you’d be a sparkle in the eyes of your many fathers..
Zlatina Mincheva says
People are a bit emotional, which is not really the best approach to explain something :) But it’s true – the lyrics are nearly impossible to translate, so OF COURSE they’ll sound funny. Actually they are completely different from what’s written in the text above and tell a beautiful story. And the music is centuries of tradition modernized, it’s literally in the blood of every Bulgarian. We are proud we have this song in the competition :)
bo says
POOR MAN !!! OBVIUSLY HIS NOT VERY SMART.
Asya from BULGARIA says
Whoever says that WATER is a bad song simply has no taste in music at all! So far in the contest I didn’t hear a single song that was more original or that sounded better at the show last night! If I have to compare the Bulgarian song with the English one… I’ll have to say there is no possible comparison! The English song lacks individuality and is simple A song. While WATER is THE song at this year Eurovision song contest! The only reason why the English song is in the final is because it is privileged not because it earned its place there.
See you at the final LOSERS! WATER is the best song this year!!!
Elitza says
Dear one who wrote the text above,
I would have been really ashamed if I had written this text. I think it is because you see that the song is one of the best in the contest and is far away better than the other ones.
A few arguments to your writings:
1. Elitsa was part of the Magic voices of Bulgaria, whose songs were played in the space. She has an extreme voice and is not definitely a dolphine. The sounds she sings are typical Bulgarian that only a few people in the world could do.
2. The text is translated to give just an idea about what is sang in the song. It cannot be translated entirely though as it carries words that cannot be translated. And after all, why everything should be in perfect English!!! Not only the English text makes the music sound good.
3. The song represents traditional Bulgarian singing, which is veeery old and difficult to present.
4. The music is veeery modern and carries the old text perfectly.
5. The stage decoration was one of the best on the semi-final, simple, but going well with the music.
And finally, save your comments next time, because you seem funny sharing such stupidities. It tells clearly about your lack of intelligence and musical culture.
WE ARE THE BEST says
BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA BULGARIA SAYS TO YOU: WE ARE THE BEST!!!!!!!
Elitza says
And one more thing,
why after all a song should have too long texts?? And why to have a meaning in English when it sounds the best in the native language?? Do not forget that in the Eurovision there have been songs in invented languages and why not when they sound GOOD!!! People are already tired of love songs, broken heart songs etc…
Di says
In England the people is very cold and they don’t know what word WATER means for Bulgarians.People in England are a kind of machine.They haven’t got HEARTS.In England the alienation is a lot.DEDUCTION:Bulgaria is the best.
Nikolay Ivanov says
As Zlatina Mincheva already said, people here are indeed replying quite emotional, which in many cases actually doesn’t show much of an intelligence as well. Of course, being Southerners, we could easily blame it on our hot blood!
However, it’s quite logical to expect such kind of replies after an article, which seems quite offending to the Bulgarian participants in Eurovision 2007 and thus to the whole Bulgarian nation, history and culture as a whole. Especially when there is no real ground for making such offenses and especially in this particular case… Of course, the article is indeed merely a personal opinion of its author and holds no further importance than that – it’s not an official statement of an official jury or anything. And everyone is free to have and express his/her own opinion! Just as I could eventually express my bad opinion, let’s say, about the British participants, history and culture. And I believe that if I do, I’d face similar angry replies as well, wouldn’t I?
Iliana Bulgaria says
One girl from Macedonia write in one site, that our song is a “macedonian”, because her grandmother were singing it years before. Dear girl, your grandmorther is a Bulgarian, but you don`t know this, because your history isn`t real. In This song is not macedonian elements. Our songs of Magedonian region of Bulgaria are very different. But You dont know that, of corse. Because, Macedonia is very, very, young republic!! Sorry.
OUR SONG IS THE BEST !!!!
Sorry, for My bad english, but I`ll believe that the all friends of Bulgaria understand me. Elitza and Stoyan are the winners!
Iskra says
This person who can write this show us his low music knowages…This song represent our Bulgarian unique way of singing and folklore.The text is again traditional folklore….and about the singer I strongly recomend to think again cos she have such scills that only here in Bulgaria can be learned….Many foreigners think that this song is amazing but If you …small person don’t understand it doesn’t give you a right to write such things….
So I’ll say only…” I’m proud to be bulgarian”…I love this song.
Sergen says
ALL ABOUT TURKEY.TURKEY WILL BE IN FIRST 5.I RESPECT ALL COUNTRS AROUND TURKEY.SPECIAL BULGARIA.I KNOW ALL BULGARIEN NO THAT TO.
Bad Turk E17 says
BUT I HATE ALL THE DICK HEADS LIKE GREECE.I WILL SPERM THEM there mum.and cyprus.NOT NORTH CYPRUS
Galina Angelova says
I love you, Elica i Stoian!
hoho says
I am very happy to see that so many people reacted to this ridiculuous article! The author really should be ashamed and should read a bit more about folklore before writing bullshit.!
As for the English song-it was enough to see a bit from it on Thursday to know that it is a total disaster.British try to copy the old childish song “Barbie girl”:)))
Whoever wrote this article, music is not all about text,it is much more about how it influence people with SOUND,how it makes people feel.And “Water” does exactly this,there is no need to sing all the time if you can make people dream and be happy.
So good luck Eliza and Stoyan and good luck to the Brits who will take one of the last places again:)
lino from ireland says
sure it doesnt make a difference, ya’s are only gonna vote for ur neighbours anyway, bring back the judges, thats why the shows gone ta shit
this is pitty says
This is bulgarian folklore. The text cannot be translated! TOday we’ll see who’s right and who’s wrong. I believe, that people all over the world will rate the bulgarian song as one of the best songs in Eurovision this year. Good luck Eliza and Stoyan!
Elena says
Good luck, Elitza and Stoyan!
Elena says
Congratulations to Elitza & Stoyan with their 5th place! Deserved more, yet got enogh
Tans says
Congratulations to Mr.Stuart with the 23 place for England ! Bonne chance the next year!
hoho says
HOHOHO, well let’s see where is UK……mmm… oh what a surprise it is the 23rd place.:)))And let’s see Bulgaria…. aha 5th place.The author,please clean your ears good next year and then write your ridiculous comments.
Congarulations for Elitza and Stoyan!
Wolf says
Just stumbled onto this article after deciding to research Elitza and Stoyan since I saw their performance on Eurovision. Although I am English I am ashamed of what I saw from our entry. I found myself amazed by Elitza and Stoyan’s performance and I voted for them. All I can say is congratulations to them on 5th place, I was shouting at the TV to see them get 1st place. The song was beautiful and their performance was masterful. I look forward to seeing more of their work.
Apocalexx says
Bravo! The best way to show how stupid you are is to write something like this! So should we all listen to boring balads like Hungary, France? Or perhaps the hard rock noises from Lordi last year? Bulgaria and Slovenia offer something ORIGINAL and in a very good way! They sing pretty, lovely, melodically, most of all – right.
I just can’t understand why you’d write this. You think you’re gaining fame this way? I don’t know your name and I never will and I will never come back to this site again, but please, feel more than happy, because you took 5 minutes of my time in which I told you how stupid you are, although one can never say enough on that…
PS: Imagine if all the songs were the same, like UK’s and France’s. Who’d watch Eurovision then? Why don’t you make your own competitions, only for western european countries – UK, Ireland, Iceland, France, Germany, Spain, Portugal, Andora and Malta. Try to air it two years in a raw anywhere and just see how many people would watch it, probably less than the population of the mountainios Slovenia. How many would like it? NONE!
psy says
fuck u, u r bullshet