Eastenders is just going from strength to strength right now. OK, it isn't, but we need to start upbeat before we look at the week ahead and start to weep uncontrollably.
This week, prostitution looms large for poor naive Whitney. She and Janine (both in dodgy wigs) go out on a ?double date? with sleazy Gary and David, and it's only Ricky that stops Janine having a very unpleasant experience.
As for Whitney, she's not slept with her punter, but she has stolen his wallet. Very wise when he knows where you live…
Meanwhile, young lovers Afia and Tamwar are having a torrid time, because of their parents and their own beefs. There's lots of argy bargy / Argee Bhajee, and sadly it looks like the relationship has to end. Can Masood put aside his own issues to save his son?s relationship?
Elsewhere, Max and Michael (aka Woody from toy story) are acting like a pair of jostling alpha male pricks, with one-woman make-up counter Vanessa in the middle and a punch in the face for Michael.
And Alfie is struggling ? he owes Michael money so pawns his wedding ring (did he only owe a tenner?), frets about the kiss he witnessed between Woody and Kat and plans a Mexican theme night in the pub. Why are they ALWAYS having theme nights in the pub? No local pub ever does this, yet they're once a week in the square, and everyone who turns up will be in costume.
Well, anyway, this one won't end well (surprise), when Alfie destroys the pi?ata in front of all the punters before storming upstairs. He then angrily blames Kat for Tommy’s death. Nice.
Elsewhere, Roxy sees Whitney’s theft on the club’s CCTV and confronts her. Whitney has to give it back but keeps some money for herself. Later, after being kicked out by Janine, Whitney is forced to spend the night in a shed at the allotment.
The shed! Not since the days of Martin Fowler have we seen it. But it was once so popular it got 1000 fan mail letters a week (maybe).
Kat?s in a state over the baby?s post mortem and, as usual, she's taking it out on Alfie and being weird with Ronnie and Michael. Is she actually going to be so vile that Alfie decides to leave the Square? And will Janine let Whitney come back into her flat?
It's cold on that allotment and there are loads of weird, pervy gardeners about (maybe).
Roxy and Michael end up kissing, spotted by Ronnie. Naturally she doesn't want the real father of her stolen baby to date her sister, as Christmas could get complicated, so schemes against it. But when Jack plans to go into business with him, she has to go further and claims he came onto her!
What a tangled web they weave down Walford way!