If there’s one thing that hecklerspray finds entertaining, it’s watching a bunch of deluded fools shamble into a room full of unforgiving critics and having their dreams torn and scattered apart like so much pathetic confetti.
This is why X Factor is so good – up until the point where they start concentrating on the ‘professional’ contestants and it becomes rubbish overnight (good only, in fact, for betting money on which gurning simpleton is going to win the contest, have a Christmas number one and then disappear into a Kwik-Save managerial role/alcoholism/Channel Five presenting.)
Thank the heavens for Dragon’s Den, then.
Anyone who has treated themselves to a viewing of the masterwork that is Dragon’s Den will realise that it single-handedly justifies the licence fee in itself.
The premise of Dragon’s Den is as follows: some hapless wannabe entrepreneurs enter a room to confront a panel of billionaire business-people about a new idea they have. They are told that their idea is bollocks and are ritually humiliated. And that’s it.
Aside from being the most riotously entertaining thing this side of Dick And Dom In Da Bungalow, Dragon’s Den also manages to create moments of genuine tension – very rarely introducing a contestant who actually has a good idea, thereby kick-starting all sorts of money-on-the-table hard-arsed negotiating malarkey.
Those who saw the show last week will remember Danny Bampling, a plucky young chap from Plymouth who had invented a new toy called The Bedlam Cube – which was kind of like the Rubiks Cube except a million times more frustrating and impossible and therefore apparently better for some reason.
The collective Dragon’s Den judges – normally forever snarling like wolves with their genitals caught in a barbed wire fence – were so enraptured by the idea that a couple of them even offered Danny a Wonka-sized golden ticket: no less than £100,000 with which to plough into his new business.
And what has Danny decided to do?
Turn the money down.
Explaining his peculiar move, he said:
"At the time the Dragons’ offer looked like a positive move. But as it transpired we never closed the deal and my bank came up with a loan as an alternative. Although I am a firm believer in the principle of a smaller percentage of a much bigger pie, I just wanted to keep control of the business.Our sales have been good and the bank loan will allow us to meet demand. I have been able to drive the business forward and keep my equity. Only time will tell if it’s a good move."
hecklerspray says: good luck, Danny.
You crazy mentalist.
Read More:
Puzzle Man Snubs Dragon’s Money – BBC News
[story by C J Davies]