There is a definite trend of companies recycling their expensive adverts of yesteryear in order to save themselves a bit of cash. To be honest, there isn’t a lot we can say as a criticism of that. Times are tough and if your product hasn’t changed very much then why bother going to the effort of making a whole new advert to?extoll?the exact same virtues.
While there’s nothing wrong with it on the face of it, some ads remind us that they were completely awful in the first place and, like last week, we’re looking into the murky, sugar-loaded world of soft drinks.
Are they a bargain? ‘Cause everyone loves a bargain, and don’t try to pretend that you don’t. There is?evidence to suggest that we are more likely to buy things if they are on some kind of offer, be it ‘buy one get one free’, ‘two for the price of one’ or ‘buy six and get thirty free pictures of stick-men in various sexual positions’.
However sometimes getting two for the price of one isn’t as good as it may seem.
Take this prime example from Fanta:
Let’s not waste too much time on this. Why are these cuddly cartoon characters partying it up with Fanta? Fanta with no alcohol in it. Perhaps it’s a very British attitude to have but alcohol is party juice. We’ve never had a sip of Fanta and felt compelled to crowdsurf, unless it was to crowdsurf to the Coca Cola Company’s HQ and tell them that it doesn’t taste as good as it used to and ask them if they’ve tried Orangina.
Still. Perhaps this ad will teach us the best way to recover from awkward social situations at parties. This las recovers using?mime as a form of modern dance. MIME! If you used mime as a method of recovering from an embarrassing door-face-interaction you’d be laughed out of that party into the waiting arms of a junkie who would promise to take you back in time to 1936 when that move was cool.
Boys don’t like to be phantom-lassoed. Just a hint there, ladies.
Demographically, the first part of the advert is confusing. This party infested by Bieber/Jonas-ites (similarity to parasites withstanding) who don’t want to drink or have crazy sex at a party but just stand around and drink Fanta. Who’s the demographic for this advert? Is it?only being shown on the Disney channel?
We thought that this train of thought might peter out but then we popped on to?Fanta’s official website?and saw The Fantanas; a girl band manufactured to sing songs about the beautiful taste of Fanta.
Is it too much to hope that Miley Cyrus and Demi Lovato will be sharpening their bitch-sticks and trimming their mullets ready for some kind of gimp-pop showdown with these girls? Coming to Disney Channel Pay-Per-View soon!
Still, let’s move onto the tagline, shall we?
“MORE FANTA. LESS SERIOUS.”
More Fanta, less serious is the entire tag to this advert. Less serious about fun, less serious about taste, less serious about music, less serious about styles of dancing that aren’t entirely anachronistic, less serious about advertising.
Possibly the thing that irks us the most is the fact that it’s not over yet.
You probably don’t want to buy a bottle of Fanta yet so let’s have an?entirely different advert with an?entirely different feel. Why they did this, no-one knows, but we can only imagine that the graphics people were on a roll and just launched straight into a new advert.
They’ve taken the most boring situation possible, some kind of lecture where the lecturer stands in silence, reading the latest?Dan Brown novel and ignoring the class. They’re bored of the lazy, untalented writing style which oozes from the page like a noxious gas. This putrid, useless pile of paper is scarcely worthy of propping open the door of this classroom. The door through which the class are about to rush out of into the Friday sun to their friends and Fanta and a complete lack of fun or entertainment.
The clock dings (helpfully, it says Friday so it saves you having to climb inside the television and consult a calendar) and suddenly the room is transformed into a club. A club. It’s 5 o’clock on a Friday! Go home and get changed. Have some dinner or something! Responsible drinking kids. Drinking Fanta in excess will make you all gassy.
“GRAB A TASTE OF FRIDAY.”
Answer us this, ladies and gentlemen. Does Fanta taste like Friday? Just because it’s alliterative? Of course it doesn’t. For a start, we’ve seen one of these things on a Tuesday. What are they saying to us?
“You still have most of the week to get through before you’ll be able to lick any surface and it will taste like Fanta! Ha!”
How dare they.
What’s a true taste of Friday? Revomitted vodka. Get to work, people.