Death threats are bad enough at the best of times, but imagine Britney Spears threatening to kill you – the combination of Britney's bad wig, poo-covered clothes, zombified eyes and honking stench of smoke would give you nightmares forever.
So God help paparazzo Andrew Deetz, who claims that Britney Spears hurled a bunch of death threats at him during a recent Las Vegas run-in. So traumatised was Deetz by the experience of being pushed against a wall and battered by a bodyguard while Britney Spears threw baby bottles and wailed "I'm going to kill you" at him that he's now planning to sue Britney Spears over the incident. It's sad moments like these that make us long for the glory days when Britney Spears just cut off all her hair, puked up in cars and let everyone see her vagittyfidget all the time.
If you thought you were having a bad week, spare a thought for Britney Spears who – through no fault of her own – has starred in the world's most grease and shit-covered photo shoot for a magazine ever and got divorced. And if you want to go back a few days, Britney Spears also slapped her mother and served her legal papers. And if you want to go back a bit further still, Britney Spears shaved off all her hair in floods of tears, attacked a car with an umbrella and then tried to kill herself in rehab while declaring herself to be the antichrist. We blame the paparazzi.
And, inevitably, we're not the only ones. Britney Spears apparently blames the paparazzi too. In fact, Britney Spears doesn't just blame the paparazzi – she wants to see all the paparazzi dead. Dead by her own hand. Dead. That's what photographer Andrew Deetz claims anyway. As E! Online reports, Andrew Deetz is suing Britney Spears for reportedly screaming death threats at him while her bodyguard was beating up both him and colleague Kyle Henderson last Thursday in Las Vegas:
One of Spears' bodyguards, Julio "J.C." Camera, pushed 23-year-old Henderson against a wall until casino security intervened. Deetz claims he was punched and kicked by Camera… He says that at that point Spears, too, wanted in on the paparazzi-punishing action. He alleges the pop star attempted to run up to Henderson, only to be stopped by security. When she was unable to reach him, she hurled a baby bottle toward him instead… Spears then launched into a cuss-filled tirade, telling him he ought to get a restraining order against her, because she was either going to kill him herself or find someone who would do the job for her. "I'm going to kill you!" she allegedly yelled.
Apparently, according to a tape released by Las Vegas police, one of the paparazzi received head injuries from the scuffle and was treated by paramedics. Meanwhile, Britney Spears has also filed a complaint against the photographers, claiming that the fight broke out when Henderson hit her son Sean Preston on the head with his camera. And if this is the case, then Britney Spears has every right to file a complaint. What sort of a world would we live in if strangers on the street could just walk up and endanger the life of Britney Spears' children?
Because, as we all know, that's Britney Spears' job.
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Viking Lumberjack says
This sounds completely strange because it goes beyond all of our collective “morality”, should we have any, but does anyone feel that aside from all of the usual insanity, we wouldn’t do the same thing?
Think about it: you’re hounded day and night by these assholes that won’t stop shoving their goddamn cameras at you for months on end, chasing you in cars, pushing your friends out of the way to get at you and knocking over your gin bottle that you use to beat unruly children with, provoking you for a reaction, pinning you down on a pool table and gang-raping you…
Scratch that last one. The gin bottle stays though. Still, it’s honestly amazing that more people don’t pull Sean Penns and start wading through the cameramen like a drunk Russell Crowe, throwing fists and sharp objects and feral cats at anything that moves.
How would the rest of you react to this? Like a media whore or a character from the movie 300? I mean, aside from head-shaving-Satan-manifested-baby-endangering-mother-slapping-car-beating-lunacy, of course.
Ed says
I don’t see why people cant just leave her alone…
Mr Bun The Baker says
Strangely I can’t find too much sympathy for the Pap!! It’s not the first instance, we had the recent ‘baked bean throwing incident’ with Hugh Grant, where the Pap scum in question tried to sue for assault – luckily the British legal system ran smoothly on that occasion, and the parasite was told exactly where to go. Hopefully the US legal system will similarly give Mr Deetz similarly short shrift.