Being Yoko Ono must be a bit of a poisoned chalice; all the joy you get from living off your dead husband's millions is neutralised by being expected to only ever talk about John Lennon all the time always to everyone you ever meet – what a yawn.
But you can't fault Yoko Ono for her ability to always come up with a new morsel of John Lennon information even a quarter of a century after he died. For example, this weekend Yoko Ono was the subject of Desert Island Discs – an appearance less about what music she'd want to take with her to a desert island and more an excuse to rattle on about how she almost got her son Sean aborted and then how John Lennon wanted to go and see Sean just before he got shot. With touching sadness, Yoko Ono then announced that the song to always remind her of that tragic incident is The Cheeky Song (Touch My Bum) by The Cheeky Girls.
What's the point of Yoko Ono, apart from being an easy target for middle-aged racists? After all, now that Heather Mills is the Beatle wife that people dislike the most and you can talk to John Lennon from beyond the grave, Yoko Ono has become slightly redundant. But that doesn't stop Yoko from ploughing on regardless, trying to set up a global John Lennon day where everyone can find peace in the lyrics of Woman Is The Nigger Of The World, starting fights with Paul McCartney for fun and suing record companies because she's not earning enough money from her dead husband as she should be.
Actually, that's unfair. There's much more to Yoko Ono than endless stories about John Lennon, like getting death threats from pervy Turkish drivers and, um… oh, who are we kidding? Death threats and John Lennon are the only things that Yoko Ono knows about, and you can probably guess which one of these Yoko Ono decided to talk most about during her appearance on Desert Island Discs this weekend. Forbes reports that Yoko Ono revealed her last conversation with Lennon was about their son Sean:
"We were returning from the studio, and I said: 'Should we go and have dinner before we go home?' and John was saying, 'No, lets go home because I want to see Sean before he goes to sleep.' And it was like he wasn't sure if we would get home before he (Sean) went to sleep and he was concerned about that."
Yoko summed this moment up by choosing John Lennon's Beautiful Boy, a song which was almost never written because Yoko and John thought about aborting Sean:
"I thought that I should let John decide whether to keep it or not. We'd just got back together and I became pregnant very soon, and I didn't know if it was the right moment to have a child. I just didn't want to burden him with something he didn't want."
Of course, Yoko Ono couldn't just pick a bunch of John Lennon songs for her time on the desert island, so instead she also chose Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien, Magic by Sean Lennon, Seoul by Amiina and a song by a band that Paul McCartney's brother was in once. Notice that there aren't any Yoko Ono songs in there – even Yoko Ono knows that a lifetime of solitude on a desert island is bad enough without having to hear a woman atonally shrieking Don't Worry Kyoko (Mummy's Only Looking for a Hand in the Snow) four times a day as well.
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fanofthefab4 says
This is really crazy,because John in his last radio and magazine interviews said that Julian was not planned and was born out of a whisky bottle on a Saturday night, but he said Sean was very much a planned child and he was really proud and happy about this, and he said he doesn’t love Julian any less.
kate says
What is sad is not only is John dead, but the only person who really knew him (other than his sons) is the same person who for a publicity stunt ate a dog in the UK not long ago. EEEEKKK