Oh shit, I am so full of sad today. After a rough few days following a botched procedure, the amazing Joan Rivers has died today.
In honor of her passing, the least E! could do is ban all Kardashian shows for at least 48 hours and just air The Fashion Police nonstop. I could deal with Giuliana Rancic’s annoying voice just to see Rivers in all her bitchy glory.
Last week, Joan Rivers was in New York getting fairly simple work done on her vocal chords. Sometime during the procedure, shit went bad and Joan went into cardiac arrest. 911 was called, and Rivers was rushed to Mt. Sinai hospital. After that news came out, there was a lot of back and forth from “anonymous sources” on Joan’s condition. Some people were saying Rivers was near death, others were saying she’d be totally fine and back to calling the First Lady a Tranny in no time.
Melissa Rivers, Joan’s not nearly as exquisite daughter, had been giving the public updates, though very generic ones. Rivers spent a few days in the ICU, and was apparently in a medically induced coma to allow her body to heal. Unfortunately, some were saying that a ton of damage had already been done, and that when (and if) Rivers woke up, she’d have a lot of issues to overcome. There was even mention of brain damage. Melissa still tried to say that everything was going to be fine, which I get because I too would be in denial that Joan was going anywhere but back to the E! studio lot.
But sadly, instead of getting back, Joan was actually put on life support. According to some sources, the family was trying to give Rivers a few days to make a miraculous recovery, before having any talks about pulling plugs. But yesterday when Melissa let it be known that Joan had been moved from ICU to a private room, we all knew shit wasn’t looking too good.
Just a few hours ago, the following statement was released by Melissa-
“It is with great sadness that I announce the death of my mother, Joan Rivers. She passed peacefully at 1:17pm surrounded by family and close friends. My son and I would like to thank the doctors, nurses, and staff of Mount Sinai Hospital for the amazing care they provided for my mother. Cooper and I have found ourselves humbled by the outpouring of love, support, and prayers we have received from around the world. They have been heard and appreciated. My mother’s greatest joy in life was to make people laugh. Although that is difficult to do right now, I know her final wish would be that we return to laughing soon.”
Fuck, Joan. FUCK. I know not everyone was a big fan of Rivers’ vulgar and sometimes over the top humor, but I think it’s pretty safe to assume if you’ve read anything I’ve written on this site, then you know that Joan was my kind of broad. She wasn’t afraid to see the lines of political correctness and shit all over them. Was she inappropriate sometimes? Hell yes. Did she sometimes go too far? Absolutely. Was her face a walking anti-plastic surgery billboard? Holy fuck, you better believe it. But she was also a huge philanthropist who did a lot for women, especially within the comedy world.
Supposedly, Melissa will be looking into suing the shit out of the doctor who botched her throat procedure. The Department of Health in New York have already opened a review into the clinic, and now that Joan has died, the NYPD will also begin an investigation.
RIP Joan. You were taken from the world too soon. May you and Robin be somewhere better, continuing to be the comedic geniuses you always were.