Will Young Launches A One-Man War On The Smoking Ban
Then buzz it up
September 29th, 2008 at 12:30 by Matthew Laidlow
Hey, guess what! Will Young has a new album coming out. How do we know this?
The Pop Idol winner has been thankfully away from our TVs and radio for a good healthy period of time. But now he’s back making all sorts of grand pronouncements. Bum. When popstars aren’t around to annoy us, no-one gives a toss about them. But when albums are released, quotes from press interviews are suddenly given massive importance. Erm… just like we’re doing right now. Bum.
You see, Will Young’s decided to come out (not literally - we’ve had a hunch for a while) with a random statement about one of the main loves in his life – the good old cigarette.
Will Young is one of those people whose main vice in life is to fill his mouth with the sweet taste of smoke. Mmm, if ever there was a sexy thought to cross our minds. Well, the thought of the stubbly lady from the off license is a close second. Sadly for Will and millions of other fag lovers, the government decided to go and outlaw smoking in pubs and public buildings, effectively making sure you can’t light up anywhere.
Hooray! Non-smokers won’t die of cancer from the evil gases that come from cigarettes. We can now wander the street with only the fear of being shot at or being stabbed in our minds instead. God bless Britain.
Some famous folk have decided to ignore the ban on smoking and do radical things like smoking on stage at gigs. But Will Young wouldn’t do that! Oh no. Probably because parents of the under-18 gigs he plays wouldn’t be happy. If their 12-year-old children want to smoke, it should be their choice. Being influenced by a past-it Pop Idol bloke won’t help.
Nevertheless, Will Young is pissed off with not being able to smoke anywhere. He told Now magazine that he’d reverse the smoking ban if he had the power. Something that’s as likely to happen as Jordan not having any more surgery on her tits. Will said:
“If I could pass any law I’d reverse the smoking ban. The amount of times I’m outside a building, in a public place, and someone says: “You can’t smoke here.†And I’m like: “I’m on the pavement; just you try and stop me!â€
Yeah! Just try and stop him. What you gonna do? Remember he sang in a competition once and now has more power then you could ever have? Leave him alone. He’s done nothing to you. At least in his mind, he can make a difference. So just go with him before things get tasty and bits of your leg go missing.
We have an idea of how Will can get his fix of smoke for free. We are all financially fucked at the minute, remember. All you need to do is get in your car and have the engine running. The fumes it emits will entice the Pop Idol bod to come and smack his lips right round the exhaust. As he breathes it all in, the option of reversing the car over him is entirely up to you. Just remember, we didn’t plant that idea in your head. Not even if the judge asks.
Related and recent:
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- Tom And Jerry Slapped With Smoking Ban
- Lenny Kravitz Can Ban Smoking, Mariah Carey Can’t Ban Smoking
- Watch The Young Knives She’s Attracted To Video
- Will Young Fancies Girls And Takes Drugs
- Charlotte Church Hates The Fags
- Jordan Releases New Book; Changes Literature Forever
- Disney Bans Smoking, Less Quick To Ban Tim Allen
September 29th, 2008 at 12:51 pm
fucking pansy non smokers. dont you know you arent a real man? grow up laidlow.
September 29th, 2008 at 9:33 pm
It is by no means a “one man war” against smoking bans, you are naive or a liar. The website http://www.forces.org has posted all of the original studies done concerning second hand smoke and none of them show any measure of danger even remotely close to what is claimed by the extremists who have promoted smoking bans.
Hats off you you Mr. Young, call me I’d love to work with you on this.
Respectfully,
Maryetta Ables
President of FORCES International
the web site gets over 12 million hits a month…. you are not alone.
September 30th, 2008 at 3:14 pm
Ahhh, yes, good old “forces.org” ; in their own words: “those who expect from life the freedom to smoke, eat, drink”
Yes, that sounds like the least they could ask, unless you stop to think that people HAVE to eat and drink to stay alive.
Also, while they are eating and drinking, they don’t force a portion of their food down the throats of everybody else in the room.
So, really “forces.org” are full of crap. If you stop and think.
September 30th, 2008 at 6:03 pm
You’d think someone who was the president of something would be a tad more rational wouldn’t you? Anyway, here’s my cunt’s tip of the day: clamp an unlit cigarette in your mouth as you wander around supermarkets, sit in the pub or deliver babies. That way you will look like a cock, but you still get to shorten the lives of some sanctimonious non-smokers as their blood pressure rises in response to your obvious cuntery. With a bit of luck one of them will have a fatal embolism from rage at your actions, and you’ll get to see another healthy non-smoker go before you do. This will make the ciggie you have to trudge all the way outside to enjoy taste even better - much like the way a blood diamond sparkles from all the souls lost to it. You’ll probably piss off plenty of smokers too, but let’s face it they’re going to meet the same horrible gasping-for-breath end as you anyway.
November 10th, 2008 at 3:17 pm
I think its good to protest but I wonder if people would be more open to the idea of smoking and nonsmoking pubs. I’m one of the people who gets ill from the smell of smoke (I dunno why it just gives me a headache and i feel sick and grumpy)and its one of the reasons why I previously wouldn’t go to pubs with people but if you could choose what pub to go in like… advertise a pub as smoking or not smoking or have smoking and non-smoking rooms… I just don’t know why they dont compromise a little, I know the smoking ban has helped a LOT of people but… still it seems unfair to separate them from society.
Any way I know you can’t do anything but that’s just my thoughts on the smoking ban (I have to do an assignment on intro to journalism about it so this is one of my sources which is why I decided to comment.)
Liz