Ah, Hollywood. My how you’ve changed…
Gone are the days of The Cosby Show, when Bill and Claire Huxtable taught their children of oddly various hues a valuable lesson in a 30-minute show whilst we reluctantly endured your attempts to increase our appreciation of jazz or education. Also gone are the days where rock stars kept their domestic squabbles swept under the rug where they belong, until the day when one of their messed-up kids writes a defacing tell-all book or made-for-TV movie to pay the bills until the next instalment of Celebrity Fit Club comes a-knocking at their door.
In these modern times of Hollywood, you can’t go a day without hearing about some celebrity trying to beat the living snot out of their spouse, or vice versa. Well, boys and girls, today’s tale of dysfunction, includes blood, violence, and fire – thanks to Velvet Revolver nee Stone Temple Pilots lead singer Scott Weiland and his blushing bride. Seriously, people. Keep the arson and such under wraps, because you’re taking up valuable press space that could be devoted to finding the autopsy results of Anna Nicole Smith’s colon.
So, anyway, the word is that Scott Weiland’s wife, Mary Weiland, took it upon herself to set $10,000 worth of Scott’s wardrobe ablaze in the front yard of their Burbank, CA home. Before we could round up the roasting pokers and s’more fixings to join in the campfire fun, the police were called (and, we’re assuming the fire department) to haul off Mrs. W to jail. She was later released on $50, 000 bail.
So, yeah, we know the issue is domestic violence, and that’s sad, but is anyone else having trouble figuring out how a rail-thin rocker who always seems to be topless and wearing ratty jeans has 10K worth of clothes to burn? Maybe some of his undies are bejewelled with diamonds that spell ‘DIVA’ on the butt, or something.
Anyway, it appears that Mary Weiland’s arson-esque rage may have been kindled, as it were, by another domestic incident the day before. Scott and Mary were kicked out of the Graciela Hotel in Burbank, CA the day before because of totally rocker-worthy fight that wrecked their room and left blood on the linens – hopefully, they had some club soda on hand to keep those nasty stains from setting.
We can’t help but be shocked to learn that the train wreck that is Scott Weiland is married. At least there weren’t any vulnerable youngsters to witness the blaze. What’s that you say? They have two children that we’re placed in the custody of relatives following the ordeal? This incident will surely stamp the kids’ lifetime therapy pass, if it wasn’t already. We’d like to take this opportunity to issue our personal credo with regards to reproduction: Just because you can procreate, does not mean that you should.
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nosebag says
Wish she’d set fire to his mouth and tongue
Keith Richards says
I feel terrible for them all; drugs are a bitch.
Why, in MY day, when we set fire to clothes it was mainly because they stank and fire was the only way we knew to deal with our pants. There were washing machines but only rich bastards and people accustomed to changing their clothes periodically had them, you see. The Man wanted us to pay coin for public use o’that shite and I’d be damned.