Here at HecklerSpray we take our celebrity gossip very seriously and pride ourselves on honest and upstanding journalism (if you’re not nothing my sarcasm you should probably leave now). I, personally, have been avidly following Kylie Jenner through this blog for almost three years, and while I’ve mentioned the mystery surrounding her in the past, I really feel like it’s time I dove full on into an investigative report.
There is something very serious going on within the Kardashian and Jenner family; something they thought they could hide from us; something I’ve joked about, but now I’m finally ready to really talk about. NEED to talk about. Yes, that’s right, I am doing a full on investigation into the disappearance of the REAL Kylie Jenner and her replacement with whoever the fuck that person in the above picture is.
We’ve gotten so used to this new Kylie Jenner, that perhaps we’ve forgotten about the real Kylie. Well, let me refresh your memories:
You’ve probably noticed that the Kylie in that picture doesn’t look a damn thing like the Kylie in the first picture. True, people grow and change over the years, but please note that these pictures were taken a mere four years apart.
Around two years ago, we started to notice a change in Kylie via her Instagram posts. She stopped looking like that second picture, and instead started looking like this:
Still a very cute and pretty girl, but clearly she’d figure out how to do her hair and make-up in ways that really flattered her. She also clearly discovered filters and editing apps, but she still looked her age and still looked like Kylie Jenner. Because she still WAS Kylie Jenner.
Then, she became this:
Less than a year ago, “Kylie” revealed the very obvious fact that she got lip injections, which seemed to explain her drastic changing look to most people. However, if the Kardashian and Jenner family thought they could trick me with that “lip injections” shit they were sadly mistaken!
First, let’s look at the most obvious piece of evidence: Kylie Jenner’s face. While most people chalk it up to her lip injections and an insane amount of makeup contouring, a few side by side pictures point out that this new “Kylie Jenner” carries very few similarities of the real Kylie. We’re not just talking different lips, we’re talking different forehead, eyes, nose, cheeks, chin, jawline, skin (WHERE DID THOSE FRECKLES GO???)
See for yourselves:
By now, you’re probably thinking to yourselves: Did this bitch really spend her entire Good Friday morning Googling before and after pictures of Kylie Jenner? Well, the answer to that is a resounding YES. Because, like I said, at this blog we are committed to upstanding journalism and bringing you the TRUTH.
After examining those pictures closely, it seems pretty obvious that there is far more to Kylie Jenner’s transformation than mere lip injections and fancy make-up tricks. I mean, bitch looks like an ENTIRELY different person from every angle.
However, maybe you’re of the belief that Kylie really did just get her lips done and hired a really solid glam team and that’s all there is to it. Well, ok, sure. That’s fine when we are just talking about her face. But we ARE NOT just talking about her face! Aside from the fact her face has completely changed, so has her body.
Just a refresher, here are some shots of Kylie taken just a couple of years ago (some less than two):
As you can see, the real Kylie had a fairly straight build. She didn’t have those Kardashian curves or anything, but she had a nice, lean body. However, that’s not how Kylie Jenner’s body looks anymore. Let’s look at some bikini pics taken since July, shall we?
Mmhmm. So let me get this straight, KRIS JENNER, you expect me to believe that THAT person is Kylie Jenner? That girl who has an entirely different bone structure from the REAL Kylie from her forehead right down to her hips? I am supposed to believe that THIS is the same person:
Don’t get me wrong, there is a bit of a resemblance there, so you did a good job with casting, but if you expect me to believe that the person you’re passing off as Kylie Jenner is the original Kylie Jenner then you are CRAZY. “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” isn’t “Lassie”. You can’t just replace a main character with someone who kind of looks like them and expect no one to notice. This is just like when they got a new dog for that Disney show “Dog with a Blog”. Did you think I wouldn’t notice that you replaced the dog, Disney? Did you?! Cuz I fucking noticed, just like I noticed that that bitch is NOT Kylie fucking Jenner.
I have several theories as what might have actually happened to the real Kylie:
- They didn’t think she was developing hot enough, so they put her in hiding and replaced her with new, “sexy” Kylie, which may or may not be what they’ve also done to Khloe this past year.
- She got knocked up with Jaden Smith’s weird alien baby and they put her into hiding and replaced her with new, “sexy” Kylie.
- The real Kylie Jenner was also transgendered, like Caitlin, but didn’t want to have the media spectacle around his transition. He now lives as Kyle, and was replaced by the new “sexy” Kylie Jenner.
- The real Kylie Jenner died of a drug overdose, but Kris Jenner was not about to take the heat for that shit, so they replaced her with—wait for it—new, “sexy” Kylie Jenner.
I have more theories than that, but those four seem the most plausible. Though I have no evidence to support any of these claims, I promise you I will get to the bottom of this troubling mystery. Or at least, I’ll think about it for another 20 minutes and then get bored and do something else. Who knows?
Billy says
This is the most idiotic thing I’ve ever read. It’s the same Kylie, you probably also believe the government did 9/11 and that the Holocaust wasn’t real also.
Rio says
Well the government did do 9/11
ed says
billy isnt very sharp
Gary Schumacher says
better idea still. F**k the entire Kardasian clan, Jenner’s sure, Kylie and Kendall are Bruce’s not too badly f’d up children.
How about it you people, let them die like old Robert did…..
Bren says
That’s because she’s a completely different person- face structure, features , body. Original Kylie was replaced. Synthetic cloning technology is here.. that’s why some celebrities look so drastically different, and there have been body doubles since around the time of WW2.