Watch Michael Moore’s New Film For Free, To Some Extent

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Hey you! Do you want to watch an obese millionaire tell you a bunch of stuff you already know in an insultingly patronising way – for free?

You do? Then does Michael Moore have a treat for you! What with this being an election year, it’s Michael Moore’s duty to ram hectoring, boorish, borderline propagandaish political information down everyone’s throats until they literally fart tedium. Only this time, he’s going to do it for free.

Michael Moore has announced that his fans can watch his new movie Slacker Uprising for free on the internet. Provided they do it in a designated three-week window and live in North America, that is. If this doesn’t include you, don’t get upset – you can probably achieve the same effect by going up to a fat tramp and getting him to whine about the government for a couple of hours and then shout at a building through a megaphone.

As things stand, there’s quite a big chance that America won’t have a Republican president by next year. And, as such, there’s quite a big chance that Michael Moore will be out of a job.

Michael Moore’s really come into his own over the last eight years by churning out films and books all about the various ways that the Republicans have narked him off, so if Barack Obama gets into power he’ll be reduced to making documentaries about kittens and writing books called I Essentially Agree With Everything Now: The Dumb Noddings Of Michael Moore.

So, on the off-chance that happens, Michael Moore needs to go out with a bang. But not the old sort of Michael Moore bang – the sort where he’d deliberately break the law and then bitch about it for months after – this time Michael Moore wants to go out on a completely new type of bang.

That’s right – Michael Moore’s doing a Radiohead.

Not literally, obviously – Michael Moore isn’t going to make one of his eyes go all squinty and wail about existential alienation in a manner that depresses a teenagers – but he is going to give his new film away for free on the internet. BBC News reports:

Oscar winner Michael Moore is to release his latest documentary free of charge on the internet. Slacker Uprising will be available as a download to North American viewers for three weeks from 23 September. Moore said he had considered a cinematic release to coincide with the current presidential race, but decided the internet would best “help get the vote out for November”.

And, if you don’t live in America, plan to observe the three-week Karlstad treaty memorial internet boycott that starts on September 23 or just don’t like Michael Moore very much, here’s the closest you’ll ever get to Slacker Uprising – the trailer…

Clever huh? It looks to us like Michael Moore spent all that money filming his political tour of America but couldn’t really release it as a film afterwards because everyone ended up voting for George Bush – ultimately making the tour a failure – only to later realise he could pin it to Barack Obama’s upsurge in popularity and make it look as if he invented getting young people to vote all along. But we could be wrong.

Either way, it’s nice to be given stuff for free – even if we’re not geographically allowed to watch the poxy thing anyway – so just imagine how much nicer it would be if the film was about something other than two hours of people congratulating Michael Moore for being such a bloody decent person.

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Comments

  1. Stabby McGee says

    Where’s that impotently outraged Michael Moore fanboy that used to write for Hecklerspray when you need him most, eh?

  2. says

    If I gave more than a small rats-arse, what with that lawsuit from the University of Tasmania on the way and my family about to be evicted, I’ld be that fan-boy, Stabby.

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