Step aside originality, because Vin Diesel is about to make his bald self some more movies, yo.
Don’t worry, kids. You won’t have to concern your pretty little heads trying to follow new characters, nor intricate plot lines, because Vin Diesel is going to cling on to the threadbare coat tails of the same old crap he’s done before.
Word on the street is that Vin Diesel has signed on to the third XXX movie, as well as the fourth Fast and the Furious sequel. Oh, and a couple of more of those Riddick film thingies, so get those Blockbuster Video cards ready to tear up the straight to DVD releases.
Vin Diesel is a special kind of person. And don’t be saying that the man can’t act, because he has about two and half movies with 37 sequels that prove otherwise.
You see, when Vin Diesel forms a complete and coherent sentence on his very own, you know there’s something special in the air. But when he forms the same choppy, clichéd sentences in formulaic action movies over and over and over again, it’s just another day at the box office.
The problem seems to arise when Vin Diesel tries to step out of his comfort zone and make actiony/science-fictiony type films like Babylon AD and it totally tanks.
What’s that? It’s exactly the same as the others just with the letters arranged to make different words in the titles? Well, then it’s time Vinny goes back to what he does best.
Or at least what has made him money in the past, since he’s problem in desperate need of some more money right about now.
Enter the recent signing of Vin Diesel to make a bunch of films he’s pretty much already made before including XXX: The Return of Xander Cage, another Fast and the Furious movie, and two more Chronicles of Riddick flicks. But this time he’ll be wearing a whole new set of white trash tank tops, so woo!
There’s still one untapped sequel he has yet to try and squeeze lifelessly dry, which is a sequel to the delightfully brain-bleeding Disney family film, The Pacifier. In the second movie, Vin Diesel stops working out and takes on the persona of the hamburger loving Popeye character, Wimpy, and saves the world of meat processing by eating enough burgers to make PETA spontaneously combust with rage. Everybody wins.
blah blah blah
You talk without making a point.
Just because YOU don’t like his acting, it doesn’t negate his talents.
You sound just like the critics when Arnold started out. Do you like Arnold now? His early stuff? Yeah- typical- you like him because someone told you to. (think about it: there are a lot of similarities between them)
It takes a higher IQ to understand Sci Fi. You are below that bar, my friend!
Gilbert Wham says
Jesus Christ. I simply do not have the words. Gir? Stabby? Someone? Deal with him, could you?
Ah, hell, I’ll give it a shot…
Hi Bob. You are an idiot.
No wait, that’s not entirely fair. You are a generic idiot.
Hmmm. Closer, but still not it. Bob, you are a Bob.
Bobbed in every way. Your measure of good acting is
a gay Austrian body builder?
And your measure of intellect is the ability to enjoy
(not necessarily comprehend, mind you) Sci Fi?
Bob, you are the erasure of history, the dismal future incarnate,
the acme of nothingness. You are a vapor, a vesper, a null set
that mistakes itself for infinity. Bob, unborn Bob, abort thyself.
How’d I do Gil? I give it a C+.
Stabby McGee says
Ha ha ha. No, this is too easy. I reckon even JBollocks could handle this.
I did quite like XXX though, even if I was expecting something a little different from the name. Also: The Pacifier – Sci Fi at its best!
You’re another idiot! Or are you actually the same person as the author? More words without making a point. Very similar to the Elliot Offen technique.
Gilbert Wham says
I maintain Science Fiction is best as a literary form m’self. Its transitions to the big screen, or the small for that matter, are usually debased and foolish. Unless you are seven years old. Or really really fucking high.
mrs. mccoy says
there are people who like vin’s acting, and people who obviously don’t. but let’s face it, the man’s got talent in the action genre of the movies. that doesn’t necessarily mean he has to be good at delivering dialogue. when’s the last time a beefy actor was good at action and had the ability to deliver an original line that came from HIS mind, not some geeky sci-fi writer dude? not everyone can be blessed with brains AND brawn.
J Bollocks says
au contraire, Stabby,
I’m wondering where all the trekkies are? Not on this thread that’s for bloody sure!
As an aside Jedi is an official religion in Australia.
vin dieselz’ one of tha best actorz out there…im seein all tha sequelz…suck a fuckin dick Annette Hyde