There is literally nothing that Lady Gaga can’t do. She can wear impractical frocks, and she can, um…
Look, it’s mainly the impractical dress thing, OK? She’s not exactly a superhero, is she? Honestly, you lot should really consider re-evaluating the level of personal investment you put into these people. It’s not doing you any good. So Lady Gaga can wear some uncomfortable-looking clothes and do a passable imitation of Madonna. So what? She’s just a person. What else has she ever done that’s so great? Huh?
Oh, actually she managed to stop a fight at one of her recent concerts by shouting at the audience and then sort of wiggling her bum around a bit. That’s sort of cool. If you like that sort of thing. There’s a video of it after the jump if you’re really that interested. You are? Oh, you people.
Having seen some of her music videos, it seems clear to how how Lady Gaga should break up a fight. She should either covertly poison the instigator to death like in the Telephone video, or she should copy the Alejandro video and just get a police to dress up in a bondage outfit and stand around forlornly while a bunch of men bum each other in the background.That would almost definitely stop most fights.
But just because Lady Gaga should stop fights like that, it doesn’t mean that she will. She could just as easily stop whichever song she’s performing halfway through, yell as hard as she can and then, somewhat ashamed that she’s just essentially screamed a variation of “LEAVE IT! HE’S NOT WORTH IT!” like a drunk girl at a wedding, ask people how sexy they think she is, wiggle her bottom about and fall over. That would also work.
And it did. This week in Washington, a fight broke out between two audience members at a Lady Gaga concert. Nobody knows what they fighting about – maybe one was obscuring the other’s view of Gaga’s crotch-bulge, or perhaps they couldn’t decide which of her songs sounded the most like an existing Madonna song – but it took Lady Gaga to put an end to it. Look…
See? See the positivity that Lady Gaga spreads? Her concerts are all about love and unity and happiness. And T-shirts. And lightning bolt make-up kits. And tour programmes that cost $75 a pop. And, to be honest, a lot of songs that all sound quite similar.
But, you know, mainly love and unity and happiness and shit like that.
Qbert2001 says
GaGa’s thighs get larger and larger every time I see them.
Chris Cook says
You’re right hasn’t even the slightest bit of musical talent. Oh for the days when Britney and the Back Street Boys rules the world of pop…
Marty says
She is beautiful and DOES spread love and positivity. Let’s see your perfect thighs and what you have done with your life before you go judging others.
drdresapinkbunny says
Frankly Hecklerspray. Your a hater. But i must say I agree with you on this one. This chick’s music is mindless. And part of a vast conspiracy to drop the IQ’s of the general world population.
Colton says
Lady Gaga is quite possibly one of the best artists ever in all music history. She actually cares about her fans and she donates large amounts of money to good causes. She devotes herself to her fans and apologizes even when she hasn’t done anything wrong. Because of this I will forever be a devoted and loyal fan of hers. Say what you want but you cant deny facts. Shes generous and she supports the equality of ALL people. Shes the new Queen of music and she is actually a good person. Love you mother monster, you’ll always be #1 on my playlist.
Tom says
The article indicates that Steph is a Madonna knock off, I always thought of her as more of a Michael Jackson knock off.
Chainsaw Sale says
her entire life is staged, scripted, and teleprompted. do you think it was an accident that her biggest photo-op was a drunken strip-tease at yankee stadium?