Against all the odds U2 have scored a Number One hit with their latest slice of middle-age snooze rock ‘Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own’.

Bono and the rest of the ridiculously named group can surely do no wrong.  Announcing a recent U-turn concerning their ’supportive’ relationship with Tony Blair, they are surely a shoe-in for Charles and Camilla’s wedding band.

It does not mean much to get to Number One in the charts these days.  In fact, most decent bands might consider it an insult. But U2 are not a decent band.

And anyone who actually gives themselves the self-titled moniker ‘The Edge’ deserves to be beamed back to their childhood playground to have the crap kicked out of them. Dungeons and Dragons this is not.

You’ve gotta love winning Best Rock Song for ‘Vertigo’ at the Grammys.

I’m askin’ for the cheque
Girl with Crimson nails
Has Jesus ’round the neck

You see what they did there? You see the way it rhymes? Genius.