TV Review – The World’s Biggest Penis, Channel Four

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jonah falcon penisHead shot. The man’s name is Jonah Falcon. There’s no denying that Jonah is blessed with a beautiful name. But – sweet shitting crikey – it’s his behemoth phallus that grabs the plaudits. A farmer apparently told him he was “built like a mule.” Welcome to The World’s Biggest Penis, shown last night on Channel Four.

Fact fans will be interested to note that your average penis is six inches long when, ahem, full of blood. Jonah’s is 13-and-a-half inches. Nearly double. It’s no joke to imagine being clubbed to death by it. There are smaller salmon. Obviously, a man with a massive thing like that isn’t going to be shy about it (who wouldn’t be?), and when it is unleashed on camera… well, it’s enough to scare a police horse. Probably make it quite jealous too.

It’s so long that Jonah can wrap it around his hand a couple of times. This just isn’t right. He could do back-stroke and – no doubt – there would be a few Cock Ness Monster gags flying about. You see, Jonah has the World’s Biggest Penis. Sure enough, he’s made his money from it (although not in skin flicks) and subsequently, craves the attention that it has obviously brought from both men and women alike.

Jonah is not alone. The World’s Biggest Penis cuts to Dan. Dan lives in Los Angeles. The
narrator tells us he’s an “intelligent man, but would like to remain anonymous.” Dan pipes up with ‘women, like, uh, see it, like, uh, like a superhuman type of, uh, superpower, like uh, yeah, a super type
thing’.
Now think on. This kid is intelligent.

Dan spends his time on an Internet forum called ‘the Large Penis Support Group’ to share his problems with other women, and hopefully meet women who call themselves ‘size queens’.

We can now assume that any women who took an interest in this article have now disappeared and logged on to the support group website.

Sure they’ve gone, but they’ll be back. Doubled up in agony. During The World’s Biggest Penis one man, obviously with an incredible wang, referred to relations with his partner as ‘a brutal and strenuous act of affection’.

The lady in question nodded in agreement, and told a tale or two about the logistics of her and her partners bedroom habits. Having one up the bum-bum in the shower et cetera.

One thing that is obvious from The World’s Biggest Penis is the effect that having a big’un tends to overshadow your personality. That it isn’t really the blessing that you’d think.

 

Going back to Jonah, he seemed like a nice enough guy. Self-analysing, and self-deprecating. However, without his phallus, he doesn’t get a second look.

So, he’s taken to (occasionally) wearing tight, gold, lame trousers to show off his alien appendage. One thing you’ve learnt is that having a gigantic old chap doesn’t buy you taste.

As ever, The World’s Biggest Penis was one of those broadcasts that was frequented by the odd expert , social commentator or some seldom heard-of writer.

These talking heads pop up and deliver profound insights into the staggeringly obvious, like:

‘It would appear that having a large penis is not good at times’.

Thanks for that.

Next we met Steed. Steed, other than being yet another person blessed with a superb name, is from California. Steed and his bruised banana  – a bloody great big bruised banana “is well known on the gay scene in the West Coast.

Steed told us that his member actively affected his choice of sexuality. Men are better equipped to deal with one of these monstrosities than women. Women get hurt.

The back door presumably has miles of intestines to work with. All said, Steed is a reasonably
sombre character who spends his time “fulfilling other people’s destiny” on various websites. Rig up the web-cam, show off your wares and make someone very very happy. This obviously is not satisfying for Steed.

Satisfaction seems to be a thing he lacks, and when talking about his sex life, he approaches it from a mathematical angle. Understandable considering.

By the time we got to Omar from Nottingham, the novelty was wearing a little thin. What does prick up your ears, though, is the news that his phallus was being given a dubious honour. It will be immortalised. By taking a cast of it and a company will fashion a sex toy from it.

Again, Omar seemed like a pretty stand up fella when he spoke of the problems he’s faced and how a cock like his can pose problems.

Maybe it is difficult to imagine these guys as nice chaps when your machismo immediately assumes they’ll be natural born show-offs. Omar was certainly not. He was under no illusion why he had gone from being a bit part in The Bill and Only Fools And Horses to being a very well paid actor in adult films.

Much like the dick on show here, The World’s Biggest Penis goes on for far too long. In fact, the viewer probably ended up feeling like an unsuspecting lady. In pain and a bit bored. Like the viewer, the novelty seemed to have worn thin with the owners of these men of silly girth and length. They are men
who are constantly trying to redefine themselves.

It is obviously difficult in the ample sundial shadow of your all walking, talking penis. So the only thing left? Get it out and smile. As stated before, who wouldn’t?

Read more:

The World’s Biggest PenisChannel Four

[story by Mof Gimmers]

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Comments

  1. jennifer p says

    I wonder why all the programs are about male attributes, when will they make a show about the biggest vaginas and actually show it opened wide or the logest vaginal lips, biggest clitoris, etc. All male all the time, you get fed up we women also have something below the belt.

  2. loko says

    Well said jennifer. TV always seems to show the male genitalia these days, ive seen many shows on the size of mens bits….but not womens. Also, tv programes will show mens erect penises but never show a woman with her legs open…..why the hell not…reverse sexism is to blame here!

  3. james says

    i am 12 and have a 7 inch penis is that small for my age and could you please send me the average penis size for my age

  4. jay says

    …joe ur a bit over average…but if i were u i woudlnt b that proud cuz im 14 and im a half inche biger…

  5. george says

    im 9 and i have a 17inch penis on the flop my friends laughed at me and sed that its too small and im just wonderin wot the average is for my age

  6. dude says

    oi an average dick is 5.5inch – 6.5inch….oi it doesnt matter anyway size doesnt matter its the way u you’s it… cause if u have a 20inch that doesnt mean u can give a women a orgasm

  7. Mr. Johnson says

    I like to win bets with my penis. When I’m in the bar, somebody usually brings up penis size at some point and I say “I like to scrape fifty cent pieces off the table with mine.” I get funny looks and they say “yeah right.” Then we go to the back room and I put twelve fifty cent pieces on the table, get my dick hard and scrape them off onto the floor. It is an attention getter for sure.

  8. TLC says

    I am 14 and i have a 16-17 inch cock i love having a dick that big!
    people can say that big is not always better but i think it is!
    not all of it is natural, i did use a pump otherwise i would be like a 9-10. i have made so many girls scream its funny! every body at my school says there’sare bigger than everyone else’s and when i get a chance to show them they just automaticly quit saying theres the biggest! If you have MSN and you would like to add me feel welcome my email address is tlcdjservices@hotmail.com

  9. says

    I too have a big penis no, i am an italian man living in napoli and i have got a 36 inch penis yes, it is a medical condition okay and every time i get an erection i pass out because soo much blood goes to it my penis. My testicles are very small like two grapes and i just look stupid like a man with a donkey and nowhere to go do you understand me yes? my wife say to me andreas your are such big man i cannot handle you living in my house, once she had to go to hopsital because of not when we had intercourse but when she tripped over it, i was asleep on the couch and she walked over to turn off the TV and BANG she was on the floor. i have soo many worries about my penis size, my doctor just laughs at me and says i wish i was like you but now i feel like a freak and dont like who i am. please help me i cannot go on

  10. MeL says

    This post sure did get some attention to those Cock Lovers out there.. or those who’s proud of their large and long penis.. hmm.. interesting though. Moderation is still the best I’d say.. not too big, not too small.. and not too long.. you might just cause cervical incompetence through banging and thrusting too deep..Good luck though..

  11. James says

    I have just turned 11 and my dick is 10.5 inches (folded in half).

    Is that too big or too small for boy of my age?

    Sometimes I have to tuck it in my sock but if I get a boner it raises my right leg up in the air and I look like Chuck Norris doing a roundhouse kick.

  12. says

    I have a 19 inch penis at 12 years of age..i want to enter a contest but…i dont know where…and my friends think i lie…PLEASE HELP ME

  13. david says

    Hi im 84 and i i dont have a big enough ruler 2 mesure my dick.it can wrap round my neck and when i shove my cock up my wives ass my dick comes out her mouth.is this wrong?

  14. Eddie says

    I’m 35 and when limp, my penis is the size of a pea. But when I get horny it becomes the size of a single peanut.

    I have to use a mirror to see it cos my belly gets in the way.

    What’s the average size for a man of my age? Can someone please confirm?

  15. Jeremiah says

    Okay, all of you little kids who are 9-12 years old with a supposedly massive dude piston are LYING FUCKS!!!!! There is no way in hell that someone who isn’t even through puberty yet has one that big. QUIT LYING…YOU ARE REALLY GAY!!!

  16. Tryst says

    Feh… you fellahs merely need to “pass the oral exam” to please a woman. They all like it, whether they’ve thought about it or not.

  17. Mr Tripod says

    Im a man of 22 and i actually wear a boot on the end of mine and perform at the circus. “there he is, Mr Tripod” they say

  18. Roderick Baldpole, Jr. says

    I’m a thirty-something married man who’s hung like a Texas stud bull. I like to call my johnson “Sam the Pirate,” but my wife just calls him “The Constrictor.” Lately, Sam has been talking to me at night. Does this happpen to anyone else out there? I’m afraid that I may be losing my mind. Please respond. It’s like this: I’m sleeping soundly, and then I hear the voice. “Fuck her,” he keeps saying. “Go on, just roll over on her and wake her up with a stab to the rafters.” I’m a sensitive guy, and can’t stand that kind of talk, but Sam keeps whispering “Fuck her, you boyscout. What are you, queer? Go on, bone the ham. Lay a floggin’ on her! You know she wants it.” Sometimes I wake up in a cold sweat, and there’s Sam, staring me in the eye. “Bang her,” he orders. “Hose her down. What are you waiting for, you wimp?” It’s a nightmare! And it seems to be getting worse. Last night, Sam woke me up at 3am, throbbing. He was as angry as I’ve ever seen him. “Slam that trollop in the flap-hole, you sorry little pissant! Go on — give her a good pipe-cleaning!” Stop it, I pleaded in my mind, and even whispered “Stop this insanity” in a very low voice. “She’s a cheap strumpet,” Sam hissed. “An easy-riding gutterslut. Hammer the chippy, you satin-pantsed faggot! Hump that wanton floozy till she begs for mercy!” I mean, it was really frightening! “Plow the wench now, you candy-ass, or I’ll do it myself! Just look at her, sleeping with that smug smile, like a nun at Christmas. She’s no saint. She’s the Devil’s plaything, you bleeding-hearted choirboy. A hustler, a freak, a shameless tramp! She’s a latent stunt-beaver, you clueless asswipe — a harlot, a tart, a nymphomaniacal B-girl, and you just lie there like a whipped chicken! You’re pathetic! What do you think is lurking up that snapper, a bear trap? Fuck her, you pussy! FUCK HER!” I sat up and shouted, “Shut up, you sex-crazed cunt monkey! You don’t own me!!” My wife was suddenly awake and staring at me. “What’s the matter, honey? Bad dream?” I just rolled over with my back to her. “Oh, it’s nothing. Go back to sleep.” But Sam was still whispering, “You miserable wimp…. You limp-wristed gayboy….” Please, anybody, I need some input here…. Is this normal?

  19. Mr. Bigglesworth says

    You punks think you got big dicks, one time when I was 15 Steven Spielberg asked me to be the star of his upcoming thriller “GODZILLA -VS- MY DICK”

  20. TinyTim says

    You guys are all lucky….my penis is only 5 inches long but it’s 8 inches in diameter(that not a typo). It looks like I have a roast in my pants. I keep getting accused of shoplifting when i go to the mall.

  21. Adam says

    Today I was at a friends house and I went to the bathroom, his mum did not lock the door and I barged in by accident. His mum was taking a pee standing up, is this normal?

  22. bj fu*king smegma. says

    jesus christ, ive never seen such ridiculously sad posts in my life. “oh, im 12 years old and my penis are big”
    what the f*ck? not only are none of these true, but its simply so friggen sad. get a life, ppl.

    oh, just for the record, I AM A TWO MONTH OLD GIRL, WHO KILLED MY MUM WHILE I WAS IN HER STOMACH BY GETTING A 40 FOOT ERECTION!!! IS THAT NORMAL!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!!!!!!???????
    OH, AND THE OTHER DAY, I KNOCKED OUT MY FRIENDS BY GETTING AN ERECTION, IS THAT NORMAL?!?!??!??!
    YEAH, AND TWO DAYS AGO I KILLED A WILD BEAR BY GETTING AN ERECTION, IS THAT NORMAL?!?!?!?!
    I NEARLY FORGOT, I HAVE SEX WITH KIM JONG IL, EVEN THOUGH I LIVE ON THE LARGE-PENIS GALAXY, WHICH IS FAR FAR AWAY, BY GETTING A 10,000,000 LIGHT YEAR LONG ERECTION, IS THAT NORMAL!?!?!?!?!

  23. jimmy says

    As far as im concerned you are all full of shit , im 43 yrs old and have a 7 and a half inche cock . but i do no one thing most women love and prefer a good strong orgasm useing my tongue , fallowed by some hard deep penertration…….. a word of advise get your head out of the clouds and listen to what a woman really wants thankyou .

  24. says

    I am died and my penisis the ony fing tht hasnt rottedaway yet is this a sign tht i need to have sex as im a virgin still and also my dicks very rinkly and shrivled like a chip but its also sucked in and its the thinness of a pencil and as big as a pen lid i will giv a girl gr8 pleasure as they wont get hurt by my dick it may not reach inside her vergina its that small wot do i do t make this fing grow i luv my dick i cud eat it off but its a mega horny fing sumtimes it shoots out stuff wen i feel it for a while i lick it as its like milk wot is it and am i normal i luv all the men out ther.

  25. bones says

    i was born with three matching legs but then one sprouted huge balls when i was 7 years old and the doctors finally confirmed that it was actually my large penis and a Nike shoe was just stuck on the end of it. i was very relieved!

  26. says

    Omg roflmao lol! 34 cm’s that’s like 26 cm’s larger than my dick!

    I wish i had a dick like yours… Btw, can u get an erection?!

    How big is it when u got a hard on?

    Dont you faint cause of all the blood loss from the rest of your body?

    Best Regards, Poffe

  27. Marathon_Lover says

    hello; i am looking for some advice. Please state your opinion. You may have heard about this on the news….unfortunately i am that marathon runner who was accused of cheating in NYC marathon a few years ago.
    What had happened was that I was running in 2nd place just A few feet behind the 1st position runner. The finish line was about 100 feet away. I knew that i wasn’t gonna be able to beat this guy since i was completely out of everything that i had. As i was running i glanced up to my side and saw 2 extremely hot girls flashing their boobs. I immidiately had an erection. Now keep in mind that I was already close to the finish line, maybe about 5 feet away n the other guy was just about 2 feet ahead of me…..I don’t know if it was a blessing or curse but by having the erection I won that race first place. My penis had put me ahead of the guy. By the time i realized what had happened; my penis had already broke thru the finish line banner. This was not to happen, i never had anything like that in my mind. You know im not a cheater, i never cheat. but this was such an embarrassing situation…u will not believe me, i still get phone calls and letters from people calling me a cheater. Its not my fault that those girls were abusing the power of their milk factories. and that I was born n raised near a nuclear facility.
    Please help, I need to have a clear mind so i can prepare for another upcoming marathon in BANGKOCK.

  28. mikontisot says

    My penis is a prehensile little thing (only a 10 incher) when I wear a kilt, I can steal cream buns from the table at afternoon tea

  29. pus says

    All i have to say is that no girl likes a penis too big or too small, and definitly not too long b/c u can seriously damage our insides and it hurts like a mother fucker.

  30. Pushpi says

    Funniest thread ever, i never have laughed so much in my whole life. “Tales from the dick crypt” were awesome.

  31. burn me says

    Look all you nuts out there…IT DOESN’T MATTER HOW LONG IT IS, BUT HOW THICK IT IS. Tell you what, once i inserted mine in an empty drum, and it got stuck. It had to be blown out using highly pressurised water-hass from the other side.

  32. Stephen says

    Well I would LOVE to be on this show b/cause I an 12 inches…. but I don’t have the girth that these guys do!

  33. Krista says

    dude im like the only CHICK on here but oh well…hello boys =] im 14 and my boyfriend has a 8incher =P….ok dudes even I know this the average when your hard is 6 (its very sad i know)…anyways a good thick girth and a good 6 inches is fine and will make the ladies forget about your size if it feels good…i promise they wont even care if you can give it to them like none other….i got a friend whoose ex bf was 8-9 inches when hard and he never made her cum once (shes older then i am btw)

  34. Phillup McCrack says

    I had a perfectly normal weiner until some of that black stuff from the Venom costume on the Spiderman 3 movie fell on my dick. Now it is 9 and a half feet long and can shoot sticky spider web jizz everywhere. It also has really sharp fangs and often bites me in the leg. Is this normal?

    P.S. I just saved a lot of money on my car insurance by switching to Geico.

  35. rice and peas says

    My penis is detachable and lights up like a beacan when erect, is this normal?

  36. Big Kahuna Dick says

    My dick is so big, it has it’s own set of lungs and a heart……………is this normal?

  37. DILD says

    Hi, whenever I close my eyes…I get an erection…whenever I open them…it goes away !!! IS THAT NORMAL ???

  38. fatso says

    my dick is the size and shape as a ferrari enzo, and can direct interface with the iphone. Is that normal?

  39. says

    My dick has it’s own set of house keys it hides under the foreskin…should I be letting it crawl the streets on it’s own?

    On Saturday mornings I play a round of golf with it, so far it is one stroke ahead.

    On Sundays I go bike riding and it slaps drivers in the face as we ride by, is that bad?

  40. joke says

    is any one 4 real here this site is so funny iam going 2 use some of them in s show keep it up peps

  41. huba buba says

    my dick is so big i resintly sued the huba buba tape comany for stealing the trademark saying for my dick. [ six feet of fun six feet of flavor ]

  42. gillian Mark says

    Hey Im a girl…and i dated a guy for a year who had a teenie weenie….like the first time i was shocked….but i got over it….
    When he was hard it was about 3-4 inches max, but when he wasnt hard…it was soo small (an inch max) …i thought he had no penis when i felt down ther. so guys its not thee most important thing….i lived with it…but now wer over i did go look for a tripod guy to give me a good hard bang.

  43. edwin says

    Im 11 years old and my dicks so big that when i get a boner my dick rips right through my pants. The other day in school i was sitting at my desk and i started thinking about what it would be like to fuck my teacher in the ass, then all of a sudden i got this explosive boner and it knocked the kid over sitting in front of me. Is this normal?

  44. Hoof Hearted says

    When my penis is soft, it’s 15 inches but when I’m hard it’s 1 inch. Is this normal?

  45. jerold says

    Hi, i am a new born waiting to be born.. im typing via satalite off my new comp in my mothers stomach my penis is like..
    well picture a chubby 6 year olds arms but holding a football at the end of it.. yes exactly.. it has been said so many times on
    here but i will have to quote it.. “IS THIS NORMAL”

  46. Tylie says

    this site is F*CKIN HILARIOUS . . . . (Ferrari enzo)(light saber)(chuck norris)… is this normal, i have never laughed so hard
    LMFAO

  47. Harry Potter says

    MIne came out when I was on the stage in the west end one time, and blinded a pony in the eye.
    I know thats normal. But is getting turned on by it normal?

  48. Labee says

    My penis is bent at a 30 degree angle, and if I see a good looking girl at work, my dick gets hard and I keep switching on my emergency hazard lights on my keyring, or my remote ignition on my car turns on automatically. One time I had my girlfriends electronic keys in my pants pocket, saw a hot chick, and you guessed it, started her car and it started driving down the street by itself because I left it in 1st gear and Im running after it with a 30 degree 8 inch hardon running sideways laughing so hard that I wanted to cum and pee at the same time!

  49. Damon says

    I think the average penis size has increased in the last 15-20 years due to the increased use of growth hormones in cows, which are passed on in their meat and milk. Kids are going into puberty at younger ages, too. I’ve heard that in the 1950s, typically puberty started at age 15 on average, but I don’t know how reliable those statistics are. My nephew had hair on his chest and belly by the time he was 12, and possibly younger.

  50. Dick Johnson says

    My dick looks like a long sword from the medevil ages, it hurts my feelings when people call me elephant cock and mayo jar and Rocket Ship and Donkey dick, i’am very sensitve about my unormaly over sized dick, whenever a girl pulls my pants down she says oh my god, and it irrtates me, last time i punched her in the fucking head and she said ooh baby thats the way i like it, so i cried miserably and left the room. i tried going out with a fat chick becuase i thought they’d have bigger holes, i swear to god i went out with a female version of jabba the hutt, and her pussy felt like a hole from a aquafina water bottle. what do i do im tired of people calling me King Dong and white boy that should be black it hurts my feelings alot. even my son said daddy why do you have a water hose in your pants. i thought about killing myself and slitting my wrist but when i cut my wrist no blood came out it was all in my dick and i failed miserably again. please help me what do i do can i have sex with rosey o donoald and maybe it will get smaller? please any ideas would be much appreciated.

  51. vicky says

    i m 27 and my penis is 6.5 but this is not straight after erecting this moves to one side after erection

  52. DESMOND says

    Im a girl and my last boyfreind had a 6 inch penis i dumped him the next day because it was so small i went and found myself a guy with a 9 inch bAZOONKA atleast 3 inches wide SO if i was really u i would try enlarge my penis if it is not above 7 inch because a girl wont want u if u dont do this commit suicide no joke like my ex cause when we were bout to fuck i told him his dick was small the next day he was found dead with a letter saying Sorry mum it wasnt ur fault.

  53. says

    My Boyfriend has a massive cock!! its about ten and a half inches long and maybe three inches thick,
    i have never had sex like it in my life, it is so painful but hey, you know what they say no pain no gain!! it is amazing… there is really nothing like a really big cock before ya go to sleep:P…. but dont go killing yourself if your cock isnt big thats just silly!!! you can do other things to your Missus they aren’t all fucked in the head like this desmond bitch!

  54. misspussy says

    my puss is that big i would take u all on lol lol funny site,had a good laugh thanks 2 all u little peanuts who have 2 lie about it,go and buy urself a big car lol

  55. Lindsey101 says

    My boyfreinds dick is real long but not very thick its wonderful wen we have sex but i mean its really thin is that normal?

  56. John says

    My penis has its own brain and eyes, and seems to control everything I do. The fucker is about 10 inches, is this normal?

  57. says

    WTF is it with all the people asking is this normal……..btw i haven’t laughed like i just have in ages rofl lightsabre but this thread has gone downhill “my dick is 100 million light years long and i fucked obi wan kenobi and darth vader at the same time and made master yoda is this normal?” funny immature shit but people do need to grow up.

    PS: To all of you’s who asked is this normal? ………….. no its not you all got serious problems u need to sort out!

    PPS: Lol but you all made me laugh so hard.

  58. says

    when erect my penis gives a thick yellow discharge, dominoes offered me millions of dollars to use it for a new buffalo wing dipping sauce. is this normal?

  59. Dairy Licious says

    Hello i need some advice. I am planning to open a new yogurt brand because I’ve been told that my jizz looks like thick yogurt and is very indistinguishable. So there I go with my business plan.
    What do you all think? is this normal? plus it will be the first yougurt of its kinda with protien and no fat contents at all.

  60. bong head says

    i’ve just taken the worlds largest dump!!!! also i enjoy sucking dick all day long.bong.kong.shlong.song. HELLO HELLO !!! YE YE YE !

  61. turd fergueson says

    NASA has recently asked me if they can hire out my dick as a bridge so they can walk to mars. Is this normal?

  62. biggan says

    my nob is so big i cant clean it. ive never seen my bell end and when i cum, it takes ages for the spunk to land on my head. Its like jack and the bean stalk. my wife has to climb to the top, and wash the cheese off. She says its tasty and i should let more women climb it.

  63. Buffalo Sausage says

    Hi, my dick is 3 inches long and 7 inches in diameter. I may not get to the back, but i always tear the sides up. I got 1 question, IS THIS NORMAL?

  64. cheesing says

    hi, im nearly 17 and my penis is so big that i have to have a wank every hour otherwise they will explode. i personally dont think its that big compared to my mums but the doctors say it the biggest they have seen, its 19inches long and 21 inches thick is this normal

    please tell me if this is normal, i am not lying i can drill through a tree with it and its cum is like acid it rots pussy

  65. Carpy says

    Well, I’m 30, and I’m very modest 7″ (compared to you tools). BUT, anyone with a REAL big wanker, feel free to contact me.

  66. hello says

    my penis is so big that i have to have extra skin added to my forskin coz it rips wen i get a erection can someone tell if i am the only one or do other peole have the same problem

    IS THIS NORMAL…………?

  67. DO Do says

    Hahaha! thats fascinating you a girl? with penis 15 inch? wao means u have got solution of both problems: u can put ur own penis in ur own fucky hole! hahahahahahahahhahahahhahahahahha

  68. Didgeridoo says

    I have quite a large penis, but, the other night I was chatting up a chick in a bar and she said “unless it’s 12 inches, then you can’t stick up may arse”.

    I said “”fuck off, I’m not having 6 inches chopped off for anyone”…

  69. im_sad says

    HEllo, my penis is very thick and long… it doesn’t fit in any clothing. I tried visiting the store “big n tall” but all the pants and underwears, and shorts can’t seems to accomodate my tool.
    so now i just wear robes everywhere….people make fun of me that i wear robes outside..they just dont understand why…. IS THIS NORMAL???

  70. says

    Lies wont get any of you guys laid, and that other guy that CLAIMS to have a 15 inch penis and CLAIMS to be a girl, how do you think that would improve your sex life?

  71. Frank says

    My penis is average in size, and both my girlfriend and myself are content with it.
    Is this normal?

  72. John says

    I think you are all extremely sad.. I feel soey for the people who are weird enough to leave a really long 10line comment.. Sad Bastards.. Im only on here to take the mic..

  73. Mickel says

    I em 7 yaers old and i are a 36 inch peepee and are that normel? when it are hard it are 62 inhes thick and 326 inches long. normal?

  74. says

    HI IM ZACK AND IM 15 YEARS OF AGE AND MY COCK IS 8 INCHES LONG.IS THAT GOOD IN AN AVRAGE SCALE?
    HEY ITS BIGGER IN TEXAS!!!

  75. Mela says

    hey there… i just want to know that I have 3 balls,,,,,,,,,is this normal?
    second thing…. i was screwing a 40yr old lady and she sounded like if she was crying ….. was that normal?
    thirdly…. I am about to take some pills to make my penis even bigger….is this normal????

  76. says

    Whats is normal

    eg bonning your sister with a dildo made of razor blades whilst your nan is shitting on here face. or being able to actually stretch your own cock inside you anus so as to bum yourself crazy
    ???????????????????????????

  77. mingsniffer says

    HEY

    iM ADDICTED TO HEADBUTTING TURDS LAID OUT ON BUBBLE WRAP

    IS THAT NORMAL

    I WAS BORN WITH AND INVERTED PENIS DOES THIS MEAN I HAVE A VAGINA

  78. Jeremy Beadle says

    Hello cyber mutants, I’m the famous Jeremy Beadle off 90′s t.v. I’m now an onion farmer in Lincolnshire, U.K. I have a willy…….. On the one hand it’s tiny but on the other it’s FUCKIN’ MASSIVE you fucking cunts………. Fuck the internet, it was much better in the 80′s when everyone knew jack shit….. my wife took me for every red cent I had and shacked up with a 16 year old turk so ……….”BANG-BANG……………

    Jeremy Beadle (1952-2008).

  79. stephen chaytor says

    hello, can you hear me? can you hear me now?? ok….. my willy is so big i have to live in a hot air balloon at 14,000 feet with my wife and 3 kids. morning wood is not good.
    x -I just wanted t be the 1st person to leave a kiss.

  80. dumb shit says

    my penis looks like a can of tuna short and fat all bitches have walls with my fat dick is that normal

  81. Melvin says

    can the admin please kill this post now…..i beg you….kill it……it just keeps growing and growing………………….kill it.

  82. Joke Police says

    Team Hecklerspray – are you proud that this has become the Thread That Will Not Die? I suppose it was inevitable given the title of the show being in the headline and all.

  83. edwin says

    Every morning after i wake up i burn my dick because it nearly touches the sun from morning wood. Is this normal?

  84. Average says

    I have a 6″ penis, which is the normal size of an adult white person.
    I’m 14 :)
    I don’t even have to ask if this is normal because i know it is.

  85. Benard says

    My dick is the same length as my legs. As it is the same length I have to buy a shoe for it when I go out.

    Is this normal?

  86. A stupid kid says

    Hi iyym 9 yehurz owld and mi pehnise is 17 inchuis lonng bekuzz iym a sthoophid khidd wiv now liyfhe.

  87. A stupid kid says

    Hi my penis is so long that I can do boxing with it and one day I was playing with this hot guy and suddenly his shorts went invisible and I could see his long hard shaft that smelt and tasted good because it had been in some guys ass so I got a boner and my dick impaled him onto the wall and now he is dead but it’s OK because I stole his cock and had it for lunch. IS THIS NORMAL??

  88. munch says

    My neighbour has both male and female parts (both very large for the record-i see that people like to know that sorta thing) and he/she impregnates him/herself every-time he/she gets excited.
    Is this abnormal?

  89. William says

    I have two penises…when hard I put a rubber band over it and use it as a slingshot from my balcony.

    Is this normal?

  90. Chris says

    My dick is 6 inches wide and 1 inch long and resembles a can of tuna. I am 11 years old.

    Is this normal for a boy of my age?

  91. Long Jhon Mckok says

    Im 14 and my penis 4 ft long. Sometimes thenstead of jacking off with my 2 hands i put it up my ass and enjoy it. Somebody please tell me if they too have this problem.IS THIS NORMAL?

  92. fertility says

    I am 30 and my cock hasn’t stopped growing since I was born. I measured it recently using a meter stick, I have to say that it is now about 60 inches long. Perhaps that makes an average of two inches a year. I find that I can only get full erections when I am at the hospital with high-pressure donor blood being intravenously pumped into my arteries. Such monster erections usually get a lot of attention from slutty nurses, if any are around at the time, who have an appetite for public cock sucking on erect knobs in excess of 2 meters.
    Such a long cock has other uses. I can tie things up with it and dangle on it when I go rock climbing down the sports center
    I couldn’t be happier with my big schlong. Everyone should be proud of their knobs – of course except those poor lads with micro penis.
    Yay!

  93. jordan says

    hi i am 12 years old and my dick is 5.5 inches long and i want to make it longr . can i use enzyte?

  94. Dodgy says

    Hey does anyone remember a song from the 80′s – something about a guy with a hundred-foot long cock?
    I think at some stage the lyrics talk about him fucking Godzilla in the ass, and maybe knocking planes out of the sky.
    I think it was called “The Incredible Fuck”

    Not normal, I know…

  95. wow says

    This is definitely THE wierdest thread I have EVER encounterred on this amazing World Wide Web!

  96. silcock says

    Hi.
    I am 13 years old and have a 6inch enis is that small for my age?

    (P.S.)I wank about 1-3 times a day

  97. chris says

    Hi I love wanking and my penis is 5 + a half inches but i am only 13 is this normal for my age?

    I use limewire for my porn and paris hilton sex tape.

    If anyone has free sex tapes please send them to Silcock01@hotmail.co.uk
    NO GAY SEX TAPES PLEASE

  98. nostromo says

    Many years ago I realised my dick had gone missing but I found it again after a few weeks of searching. I must admit it had been a worrying time but there it was again. Coincidentally enough it habitually wore mini-skirts and had grown a killer pair of legs. I managed to befriend it again, reluctant as it was at first, and we have lived happily together these many years. A great cook and manager of our funds too, it has to be said.
    Is this normal?

  99. christopher says

    when i have a full erection (or any erection) the head of my penis gets covered by extra skin. and it hurts when i pull the extra skin back, also when i pull it back you still can’t see the head
    (i am only 13, but i think it has to do with the fact that when i was young i pulled my penis back to hard and cut it)

  100. Yo momma says

    My penis looks just like corn on the cob…its ugly but it taste great with some butter and salt!

  101. Bill says

    When I get excited my cock bends around my scrotum between my legs and goes into my bumhole.

    Is this normal?

  102. Chuck Norris says

    My Penis is so large that it is now covering the entire planet earth. This is excellent for crime fighting as I can shift my body and blood with an erection and appear anywhere on earth. Is this normal?

  103. Old Billy says

    My penis measures 575 mm when fully sized. Is this normal for a man who turns 86 this summer?

  104. katie says

    wow youll people got a lot of problems!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1!!!!!!!and most of you need to get a life big time and you no 4 a fact that your lieing just so people got something to read and then think DAMN where do that boy live at id hit dat or just have something to look at then lolz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and most people on these websites are rapers n wana screw some booty!?!?!so you should not try and expose your self so fast and if it is that important to expose your self that fastthan you have major problems and should get a job to keep your mind out of the gutter and rember STAY IN SCHOOL IT DOSE HELP 4 YOUR FUTURE!!!!!!!!!!!!! i know from experiance!!!!!!!

  105. p burns says

    im so old and crusty that i need a crowbar to ply back my foreskin

    is this normal

    ps wats an erection

  106. says

    i am damn sure my penis is the biggest in the world , u all mother fuckers come to have a taste of it and i bet ur all mothers will sweat

  107. Joe Mannix says

    I am almost 15 and I can’t measure my willy accurately. I think it’s about 4 inches, but my foreskin is 3 feet long and I can’t pull it back far enough to see. When erect, it looks like a snake digesting an egg. Is this normal?

    Also, when at school I have to roll up the skin and put it in a colostomy bag. It smells funny sometimes. Does anyone else have this problem??

  108. blahblah says

    the weirdest and most stupid thread in the whole world.

    why these people put stupid posts like im a 8yr old kid with random size. fucking rediculous bastards

  109. Ben Nau says

    Hello,
    My name is Ben Nau, I from South-Korea. My penis measures just 4cm when erected. Can i grow it bigger? Im 27 years old. Please help me.

  110. Big-red says

    i fucked this kid in the ass one day nd he saw that mi cum filled his nuts nd 2 days later his nuts exploded is dat normal?

  111. Scott says

    My cock is so bent over that whenever I get a boner, it hits my balls. This really hurts and I’m afraid that I will soon neuter myself.
    Does anyone else have this problem

  112. George Bush says

    Heya I ain’t the most intellijent guy and dis here thread (yuck yucK) is conphusing my little old bran, so I was wondering if one of you here folks could joost infarm me of one perticular peece of informasion: watt is a peenis? Whateva it is, I sure don’t pozess one. Do they have them in Irack or Irann, cos I need to start some more here wars, and those penises are prooving a threet to the safty of the enteere civilized world, dammit! I preesume these here bonners you yak about are attacks by el kayakeda using these here new-fangled penises on the good folkk of this here country. How dar they use bonners to kill americans, when my here actions are the only thing that shood. Damit, I don’t want these here bonners to kill more folk than I did with Katreena or lakk of affordable healthcare. Hey, wate a minute, bonners should be leegalised so that all americcans kan carry them – the konstitution says a man has a rite to deefend himself, and bonners must be aloowed so theey kan do dis. Dis is all so confusin (yuck yuvk), may be I sgood just go ask sumone – where’s that nise Karl Rove wenn yuo need him, or that greet Scooter Libby. I cood teell John Mccain about these bonners – im shure thats one thing that Byrakk Obarma aint got

  113. jo says

    When my dick gets hard it bends down and around and everytime it gos into my own ass, is that normal?

  114. jim jam says

    My penis is so damn big the only thing i manage to bang is elephants is that normal?

  115. smeg says

    hi my dick can time travel and spends its time fucking various historical figures.

    is that normal?

  116. smokie3883 says

    Sometimes I have to tuck my penis in my sock but if I get a boner it raises my right leg up in the air and I look like Chuck Norris doing a roundhouse kick.

    haha. funny shit. this is so stupid. why am i here? mmm. im gone

  117. hello says

    hi my penis was so long  it was 10 inches long is it normal?? i’m 12 yrs. old.. ang i love to put a balloon on it…

  118. Kekz says

    I r  23 and be pro gigolo guy, me has as big penis as Satan in Hell’s asshole, I r super serial!

  119. Tom Barton says

    hi my names tom I am actually typing this with my cock it is at least 19.34 inches long but it has a pointer on the end of it making it useful for day-to-day tasks such as typingThe only problem is when I pre-cum it goes all over the keys and I have to clean it, I can also tickle my wifes g-spot when shes sucking me off.However one time I came and it was actually black like dirty oil, is this normal?

  120. Edward says

    When my dick gets hard it helps my mobile phone get better reception.
    Is this normal?

  121. curtis says

    Hi. This guy named’z kurtis his age is 16yrs old n his idck is 3inch when soft n his dick is 6 n half when hard.. Is that normal? Or too small? Or huge?

    Huh?

  122. Josh says

    Ahhhhahhahhah … i have never read such hilarious posts. ahhhhahahahahah … rofl … i think i’m going to burst laughing. 9 yr old with 12 inch long penises … hahaha … oh god … i have not laughed like this in ages. thanx a lot guys … btw … i am in Pakistan, it’s 6 am and i need to get some sleep. thanx a lot everyone. this was real fun.

  123. Mike the Marrow says

    Just remember to water it every day and don’t expose it to direct sunlight.

  124. papajon says

    my penis is like a swiss army kinfe and its so big people live on it but i hate them because they always make it itch on the little eye part. and the other day i was wheeling my cock down the road and i got arested because my large penis punched some old lady in her bingo-wings and she was allergic to penis so she died but i didnt mean it… then i tried to kill my penis but i got defeated because of its swiss army like features so i looked it in its itchy eye and it say to me “is this normal” and it shot me in the face with its special sauce and my face got pregnant then when the self-imbreed demon child was born it turned out to be david blane and all that was his new magic stunt…. but then he got put in jail because he was responsible for killing the old lady and when he was in prison someone put there john wayne up his bum-bum and made him say “oohhh unlce” and they smeared mayonase on him…. my penis also always spermes on people by accident…. also my friends penis is 1 inch long but its 12 inch wide so evrybody calls him pizza-dick is this normal. hahahaha (best comment yet!)

  125. bob hordson says

    i have a bigger penis than this guy! Mine is 11inches in its flacid state! allmost 17inches when erect!!! see me, put me on C4 for crying out loud, his penis is small compared to mine!

  126. Kimmy The Fighter says

    yo yo yo, im kimmy and my penis is so long, that when i have a shit, my penis is dangling down the toilet and all the shit goes on my dick, and i say to my girlfriend “yo, bitch! come over here and suck all the chocolate sauce off my dick!” and she likes it ;]

  127. bigbigone says

    well you know when people die they get buried 16 feet under ground well im gonna get burried 34 feet under, or it would poke out, and people would think it was a tree stump. and if they try to turn me sideway’s i will hit the other people’s coffins. is this normal?

  128. OldCock says

    I am very old, and I have never measured my penis, but for millions of years I have used it to keep the moon in orbit around the earth. When the moon goes dark, that is because I’m wrapping my enormous black cock around it. Once a month I unwrap it so I can fuck your mother. She is the only woman loose enough to take me. Most of the time I prefer the moon as it is much less rough and crusty than your mom. But a man has needs. Unfortunately she is not very satisfying because she is so loose that I don’t even touch the sides. So if you know any other loose women I am open to a change. (Someone suggested Paris or Britney, but I don’t want to catch anything. I would have sores the size of Mount Everest!)

    Anyhow, is this normal?

  129. scott says

    hey im scott im 13 years old and erect my penis is 6.2 inches long and 3inches wide is that too small or what?

  130. says

    Look, greta, I don’t think ur exactly telling th etruth. I hate liars, and I don’t think ur a) a girl or b) in the ownership of a 24.5 inch cock
    piss off, liar face

  131. says

    this shit all sounds good but all of you big dick claimers cant show and stick so cut the bullshit i wish i could find a disease free big dick man who can stick and lick without making me choose between the 2 of which one he does the best goddamnnnnnnnnn wheres that jonah

  132. Barnaby Jones says

    helpp!!!

    i am 32 and my pepe just up an fell off has this happen to other blokes? i tr/y contact cement to affix it back and it wont work right..

    btw it measure 3.1415926535 inches on the main dry part when i stretch it out tight.. i stretched it out a lot but then it came off.

    somehow i suspect it isnt normal

  133. Greg Lovelace says

    im 4 and my dick is 15 inches……….but on soft.When it gets hard its like 27 inches long!!I have to use it as a belt sometomes!!!

  134. says

    I’m going to start a blog devoted just to big penises and live off the ad earnings. And Sarah, I was going to say something rather horrid about/to you but unaccountably I had an attack of common good courtesy instead. So, nicely said!

  135. toolahroolahroolah says

    My penis types over 60 words per minute. In fact, it is typing this post while I use my hands to eat breakfast. Multitasking is where its at.

  136. Shagy says

    Yo crazy ass your cock is bigger then your hight ow…..so sad,you don’t have any choice to cut your….. Watever and who was that lady spocked her boyfriend has 8-9inches,well I know her very well the truth is her bf got 8-9cm…..it’s beter to say that 6inches cock is perfect then don’t think that i’m 6inches,I’m a guy of a simple taste i’m 9.5inches not crazy as you people.

  137. Hector says

    i’m 13 and my penis is 86.62 inches long and an even 18 in circumference… when not erect… also my testicles are approx. the size of softballs. i cant really wear shorts or else my penis and balls just hang out onto the ground… i have to wear pants so i can hve it folded up inside and down one pant leg. i have won 16 fights with it with not a scratch on it after. i just slither it out of my pants and punch and strangle with it. it can move pretty darn fast. in fact nodody has ever been able to get a hold of it or even touch it at all in those fights. the doctor says my pubic hair amount is way above average for adult. i run track and have also won all of the contests, but thats just my fitness. i can lift up to 643 pounds with it and lastly, i have to kinda run down the halls at school in between classes because all the girls are grouping around me gigling and trying to touch me, they see the giaant long thick muscular veiny bulge in my pants, and go crazy. they say i have the perfect face too… all this has made my life very different from all the other boys, and a lot more strange… anyway, i was wondering if this is something to be proud of? is my penis too small?

  138. George Bush says

    I am the Biggest Cock and i love my big cock. It’s a great cock that once you get to know him he’ll do anything for you. I even help him run the country every Monday and Friday. He even has his own Mobile Cheeese van he uses that to drive around the country to sell his home made cheese. Its a great cheese thats liked by all. Is it normal for a cock to make such good tasting cheese??

  139. andy says

    hello everyone i am just writing to see if anyone has a bigger penis than me and i have to say i have a 18 inch penis and i am 32.

  140. humansundial says

    Well I’m sure glad you people find this all so damn funny. I’m a 34 year old man and my penis is so big that I was told by the doctor that I cannot have an erection for more than 3-4 minutes or I will die.I have to take drugs to help control my erections. Do you know what it’s like to never even be able to jack off? When I was 16 I had to be rushed to the hospital b/c my penis had gotten wrapped around my neck while I was sleeping and I got a boner (which also left my penis permanently coiled like a 10-ft. slinky). Luckily my mom was awake and heard me gasping for air and trying to yell and called 911, or I would not be here right now, reading all of your ridiculous, ignorant and insulting comments.

  141. shit head says

    hey, im 12 and my wang is 5 and a half inches… is this above or below average? what is average?

  142. Jon Boy says

    Do you all realize that most women love an average size penis. I personally am a little above average, but that is nothing to brag about, you must use a lot more lubrication, you must be delicate with a woman and not just ram the shit out of her. Several times my wife and I had to stop because it hurts. Start slow and delicate, then let her get her orgasm. That will lube her up to the point that you can almost insert all the way and can have a great orgasm themselves. I woman cannot do much with a 9 in. penis so anything past 8″ is a waste. Be proud, women love confidence in the bedroom, and do not have an endless pussy. So whether little or big, fuck like champs all the time.

  143. Charles says

    Awh sounds like theese guy are a bunch of cry babies. My wife was just caling me a short dick prick the other day. If their so bored with al that dick they can always send a couple inches my way!!

  144. Kathy says

    Hi i am a size queen and love guys with huge cocks. For some reson when a guy sports 12 inches or more i simply go crazy over it. If guys can like big boobs why cant girls love big cocks .

  145. Jorge says

    Hey I’m three and a half years old and my penis is 18 inches long, is that small for my age?

  146. freak says

    Hey i am in my mother womb still (I have wireless internet in here) and i had this chick over the other day and we were about to do it when she saw my penis… Well she didnt exactly see it because when she pulled my pants down it poked her in the eye and killed her.. IS THIS NORMAL

  147. COCK! says

    Hi, im 5 days old and my penis is 20 metres long, it drags along the floor when i walk around, sometimes i trip over it and hurt myself. I sometimes try and wrap it up in a ball and tie it in knots before i go for a walk but it always ends up hanging out of the bottom of my trousers and trailing along behind me. Also, when i go for a swim, it hangs out the bottom of my trunks and seems to swim along with me. Im not quite sure what to do, shall i leave it as it is or cut it shorter? Please help me.

  148. ben andrews says

    i,ve a friend and huis name is jerry peetermain and his pen friend is my penis it so hard in kids this kids ass it makes him do things like write a play about lebanese giraffes stalking killer lemon trees in brazil. i love my mothers tight pussy!!!!!

  149. says

    Hi I live in Reno but my cock does not and I’m 13 and three quarters and once my cock was in Vegas but I was not and my cock hit a jack-pot but did not have I.D. is this normal? Also, my cock is kinda big.

  150. I like midgets says

    I’m 32 and haven’t been through puberty yet. It started at 16. I hated it because i was a “late bloomer” and all of the other kids had such big cocks. I was always embarasses to go into the showers. At 16 i started getting hair down there and lots of pimples. Then at 16 and a half nothing. I still have no hair anywhere else, a little tuff of dark hair on my junk, but it’s real fine. My doctor says my metabolism did some reverse cojudeadenal thing, i don’t know what the fuck he’s talking about, but my penis is only 15 inches long? When, oh, when will i fill out? Is this normal?

    And midgets are hot!!! I think, since i’m not fully a man yet, :(

  151. Braviano says

    My penis held my testicles against a cinder block and then smashed them with a tack hammer.

    I’m pressing charges.

  152. Harry says

    My penis is 3 inches long and 19 inches wide. From the top down it looks like I’m looking at a cake side on. I’m 11 years old.

    Is that normal for a boy of my age?

  153. richard taylor says

    well my dick is the best and who wants to shag cum on baby! haha! i will lick ya fanny shag ya until it hurts oooooooooooooo! haha!

  154. mrs.browser says

    Aha I most deff. Found those baby jokes with the large penis’s exxxtremly amusing [:

    I hope mr.13 inch doesn’t break his “shaboinka” coz then he can’t have sex for like three months and has to take viagra for like 6 and the worst part is. He LOSES 3inches :\
    And google it, it is possible for a man to break his shaboinka

  155. mahmoud says

    Hi,Kathi
    I,d like to send and recieve messages with you
    besides, i,m anxious to fuck you with my 16″ dick

  156. says

    Well i just turned 13 and my penis is i think 8 and a half inches i don’t know if thats normal my friend Cody Lafoy has a 2 inch penis and he is almost 14

  157. H3XalphA says

    I cannot find my “penis”. Where exactly is it located?
    Can someone show me a map to it or something? I need help soon.
    If possible, call me at 1.800.911 to place an appointment or show me a diagram of some sort.

  158. Kackmaster says

    My parents have yet to be conceived and my cock looks like a 2 liter bottle at a 1:1 scale. Is this normal?

  159. Mike H says

    Hello my name is micheal and i work for the hospital my penis is so long i can spin it around and i can fly to emergency situations like medivac so my long penis saves lives every day i think it deserves a medal dont you?

  160. Daniel K says

    Hello my penis is seven inches long well when it is soft when its hard its three and sometimes when i go pee it whistles show tunes is this normal? any girls that like show tunes call me

  161. Nick Boner says

    I don’t believe that this Jonah Falcon charactor has a 13 inch penis
    because I haven’t seen the proof, I hear all these stories but I’m yet
    to see an actual picture of his so called 13 inch penis. I think it’s
    a bunch of bull because he has no actual pictures to back up his claim.
    I have a 12 inch penis, and I am willing to back up my claim with pictures and I will submit them if you need proof if my penis size. My motto is “don’t talk it unless you can back it up” So that why I’m talking, because I can back up anything I say with the proof. As far as I’m concerned this Jonah Falcon is a 13 inch LIE until I see actual pictures, It’s a lie. If you are gonna talk this talk be sure that you can walk the walk, because otherwise your just wasting time B.Sing people.

  162. Frank Cannon says

    I think my penis is gay, and I disapprove.

    Is this normal? Do I have any legal recourse available to me? Shouldn’t I have some say in what my penis does when I’m not around?

  163. says

    Hahahahahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What proof do you have that any of those stuff your saying is true!!!

  164. Cameron! says

    HA your only average and it is always good to fuck the living shit out of them thats the only way i fuck

  165. charles says

    my penis has proved that the “Theory of Relativity”. According to this theory nothing can travel more then the speed of light but whenever i jerk my long penis it reaches to planets like Jupeter and Uranus in a second. When Neil Armstrong reached the Moon after travelling three days, he found my penis already lying there.

  166. jorgee says

    i was stranded on a island and pulled out my penis and pulled of my pants i swam past the big waves and tied my pants to my mast as i floated all the way to south america and on the way fished with my rod wen ungry i ate wen thirsty i drank milk wen ungry i had sting cheese wen i got dare i pulled out anchor with my mast and waded to shore. sorry i am bullshitting you is that normal for a two week old ???????????

  167. purple gut rocket says

    My gut meat is a foul smelling 16″ inches of rancid bazooka beef. I am beginning to wretch right now as I recoil in disgust from the blood clots and open sores along its porcine ridges and festering, putrid, girth.

  168. Greekboy says

    In your article you say that the average penis length is 6inches and Jonah Falcon’s is 13.5inches…. almost double. Don’t you mean MORE THAN DOUBLE you innumerate fuck!!

  169. bob wangslanger says

    hello i am an asian midget man with a 18 inch dick that attracts objects. your mom suck my big dick . i can legally marry to bitches one for my dick one for me

  170. says

    why would he lie he prolly doesn’t get laid cuz hes so big and it looks like he has no life cuz he has such a big dick now if this was happening to you and you were lying wouldn’t you stop and tell the truth so you could live a normal life

  171. Thomas Banacek says

    My penis flashes like hazard lights whenever the weather is bad. It keeps asking me if it can go out in the rain and direct traffic. It this normal behaviour?

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