Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy
Season Six of Mad Men is fast approaching and it’s time we discuss what we want—nay, need to happen to one Don Draper and the rest of the gang at Sterling Cooper Draper Price Crosby Stills Nash and Young.
This is serious stuff folks, Mad Men head honcho Matthew Weiner has said that Mad Men will end with its seventh season so that makes this the penultimate season. This is Mad Men’s The Empire Strikes Back, this is Mad Men’s Morrison Hotel.
Making a show about fighting robots into something exciting should be simple. When the words “robot”, “combat”, and “league” are combined, they create emotions only rivaled by the combination of “car wash” and “Eva Mendes.”
However, leave it to Syfy, a channel that had already succeeded in making the search for Bigfoot boring, to create the most lackluster show about punching metal that you’ll ever see. The first episode of Robot Combat League premiered yesterday, and it let me down in nearly every way possible.
Earth, wind, fire and water are the elements that make up 30% of the world. The other 70% of the world is made of Stephen King. He’s everywhere. Anytime you feel like their might be someone else in an empty room, it’s just the presence of Stephen King.
And as much as the master of horror literature is everywhere, he deserves to be everywhere-er. One of his latest novels, “Under The Dome,” is getting turned into a TV series and more from his expansive library should get the same treatment. Here are five Stephen King stories that need to be on your television.
Hi, welcome to the article 7 Most Lovable Douchebags In TV And Film, did you gain a bunch of weight recently or did your face just get pregnant? Boom. Right out the gate, let’s come to a consensus for what and what does not constitute a douchebag.
Obviously the opening of this article was just an inquiry from a concerned friend about the maidenhood of your double chin, and should not in any way be construed as an example of exceptional douchebaggery. That being said, the overt smugness of that last sentence might be a good litmus test for what and what doesn’t make one a douchebag. Or does it?
A little while ago, I wrote that Glee was a fantastic series about secret agents and sex robots, based on the YouTube comments that I’d read. To be honest, I believe my assumptions were fairly accurate. Due to the spot-on nature of my perception, I decided to apply this same method to another show that I’ve never watched, Downton Abbey.
Now, from what I’ve heard, Downton Abbey consists mainly of British people being assholes to one another. I’ll use this as the platform from which to start my research.
Alright, YouTube comments, you paradigm of telling me I’m dumb and then trying to fight me, it’s time to go to work.
Vitamins are very important, especially for growing children. But, do you know what’s even more important than iron and protein supplements? Pro wrestling.
I know that it seems ludicrous, and my God it is, but pro wrestling does more to promote health than any vitamin. It was absolutely necessary in the creation of the man I know me to be today. And I rule. Here are seven reasons why fake TV wrestling is better than taking your vitamins.
Advertisements are used to help consumers make choices, and it’s a testament to their effectiveness that this Trojan man really wants an iPad Pepsi Kia right now. One of the biggest showcases for advertisements is the Super Bowl, where companies spend millions of dollars, just to get a spot that millions will see. This list is comprised of the worst of these ads, ads that missed their mark so badly that sales will probably decrease.
I would do a list of the best ones, but it would probably just be a video of Beyonce’s half-time performance over and over again. Oh, Beyonce, you magnificent Aphrodite.
To describe American Horror Story as “good” would show a severe misunderstanding of the word, and to describe it as bad would be discrediting to all the good parts of it. In short, American Horror Story is a bizarre combination of weirdness and ineptitude, leaving viewers with one of the most bizarre shows on television.
Almost nothing on AHS works in the way that it should, and I love it for it. It’s because of this schizophrenic mixture of amazing things stemming from unintended awfulness that we get a great cast of characters.
These are the seven best characters on American Horror Story, for reasons that are often as nuts as the show itself.
Before you could put a TV character’s quote on top of an image of the character themselves, relationships were simply fifty years of begging someone to listen. Thanks to a mix of the internet, TV and graphic editing software, we can now explain our feelings with things that fake people have done/said.
I wouldn’t call this indirect, but it’s akin to being an assassin whose only method is to tweet about all the murders he might commit. If Republicans used this same tactic in their campaigns, you would have a bunch of sixty-year-old men describing the definition of rape as “that one scene in Death Wish, possibly.”
The CBS show, How I Met Your Mother, is extremely popular when it comes to statements about love and romance. And, as it often is with things that don’t actually exist, a lot of these “tips” don’t exactly apply to real life. Sorry, Tumblr.
The Oscar nominees for 2013 were just announced and the backlash is huge, as nothing creates strong opinions like someone else’s opinions. However, in these times of argument and sarcastic tweets about Battleship, one opinion stands alone as universal.
It is the opinion that Justified is the best show on TV right now. I can’t let it lay claim to the greatest show ever, as Deadwood once existed, but in the current realm of boxes that shoot visuals into your home, Justified reigns supreme.
Oh, five reasons for that? Well, I just happen to have that number.
