You want to sell a car? Employ Jessica Biel and Jessica Alba to tongue each other on the bonnet dressed in bikinis. Simple. You want to sell an aftershave? Employ Hayden Panettiere or Megan Fox to suddenly find any man wearing it irresistible. Simple, but effective. And, let’s face it, anything is better than those bloody aftershave ads that look like something Tracy Emin vomited out after a night on the tiles.
You want to sell tampons? OK, you’re on your own.
The point is, it’s hardly rocket science. Sex sells – everyone knows that. Give a heterosexual man enough of a look at sexy lady flesh and he’ll be halfway to the shop before you know it. New deodorant? Great. New mobile phone? OK! New treatment for thrush? Errr.
It’s not that we’re simple – we just like to look at images of half-naked, sexy girls. Well, just to emphasise the point, Hecklerspray has overcome some technical issues and decided to come up with its choice of the sexiest ads to date, properly this time. Enjoy!
26. Ellesse tennis ad
We all should play more tennis.
25. Go daddy commercial
Just some good, old-fashioned, squeaky-clean fun. Not sure what it hasto do with Go Daddy, but who cares?
24. Levi’s train commercial
Not entirely sure about she didn’t just use scissors, but who are we to judge?
23. Sprite Zero Commercial
See we learned something today – don’t stalk pretty girls or you’ll end up with no pants. Or something.
22. Scruffs Hardware Commercial
So much better than DIY.
21. Chocoparty ad
What is she selling again? We just spent the last few minutes bobbing our head up and down.
20. Brooke Shields in Calvin Klein jeans ad
You know, Brooke Shields when she was younger could do some amazing things with her body. Well, we’ve all seen Blue Lagoon.
19. Alysso Milano ad for Candie’s perfume
This is the way to sell a product. So simple.
18. Tabasco ad
Now, that’s hot stuff.
17. Britney Spears in ‘Curious’ ad
The only thing we’re curious about why Britney’s room is not padded.
16. Axe Bullet funny ad
Imagine actually owning X-ray specs? Let’s face it, you would spend most of your day shielding your eyes.
15. Lynx commercial
We all could do with more slow motion boob action.
14. Xenergy Drink ad
Just drinking Xenergy drink can turn your life into an MTV video. In another ad for the same drink, the same model Monica is so sexy she could even turn on motorbikes. Put that in Heroes.
13. Vaio commercial
This happen all the time at Hecklerspray Towers.
12. Miller catfight ad
Girls fighting – isn’t that every bloke’s fantasy? Well, actually no, because we all know that the reality is a whole lot different.
11. Victoria Secret – what is sexy commercial
What is sexy? Errr, this video, for starters. Not exactly a secret, Victoria.
10. New Yorker lingerie ad
Not entirely sure they thought this one through. Knickers that can kill?
9. Cindy Crawford Pepsi ad
The success of this ad is summed up in two words – Cindy and Crawford. That’s one mole you would not mind rummaging around in your garden.
8. Paris Hilton’s burger ad
Would have been higher but it’s not exactly the first time we have seen her with some meat in her mouth. Mind you, good to see her actually do some work for a change.
7. Schiesser ad
Belgian nurses have an interesting way to stop a man going into cardiac arrest and a far better bedside manner.
6. Mac’s Orange Juice commercial
This is a such a bizarre ad, but it works for us. We think it’s trying to say, never drink orange juice from horny trees or it turns you into a lesbian. Or something like that.
5. Napster commercial
Even if you hate Napster – you’ll like this ad.
4. Victoria Secret’s Christmas ad
What would Christmas be without Victoria’s Secret? It’s enough to make Santa’s sack bulge.
3. Eva Mendes’ Calvin Klein commercial
Eva Mendes naked. Perfect. More ads like this please.
2. Agent Provocateur commercial with Kylie Minogue
Agent Provocateur has the sexiest underwear you can buy – just as long as you are buying it for Kylie Minogue.
1. Bavaria beer ad
Beer and women – the perfect combination.