Here's the news you've all been waiting for, the biggest news of the decade, the date that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are finally getting married – it's – oh, you already saw it in the headline, fair enough.
According to a bunch of people who know about this sort of thing, Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are getting married on November 23. Probably. Just to add to the confusion, it's also reported that the Tom Cruise/ Katie Holmes wedding will take place at George Clooney's Italian villa – the scene of countless non-weddings by Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Is it too early to start getting needlessly doubtful about the whole thing yet?
It's been a slow process, but now Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes finally seem to have everything in order for their wedding. Katie Holmes has taken her Buff Brides fitness program, she's bought her wedding dress and she's even had time to silently pop out a baby even though she's still supposed to be a virgin. Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise just needed two more things to make their wedding complete – a wedding date and a wedding location. We thought we had those two pegged as being at the Scientology Celebrity Centre in August but we were way off the mark. Now it's being reported that George Clooney's house in Italy might be the location, as Metro reports:
Hollywood golden couple Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are to tie the knot at George Clooney's Italian lakeside villa. Details of their marriage plans were leaked to a newspaper in Como at the weekend. The date for the wedding is believed to be November 23. Holmes, 28, and Cruise, 44 – who have a five-month old daughter, Suri – are said to have opted for Clooney's luxury Villa Oleandra after holidaying there.
These Como people sure do love leaking their celebrity wedding plans to newspapers, don't they? In the past George Clooney has been forced to release a statement saying that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie weren't getting married at his house and then there some more Brad/ Angie/ Lake Como wedding rumours which look very much like they were all invented by Como residents who just wanted to make a fast buck and wind the press up a bit.
So are Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes really getting married on November 23 on the shores of Lake Como? Who can really say for sure, although we're sure to be heading down there armed with our suitcases of human placentas to use as confetti on the off-chance that it's true. Even if it's not true we'll be glad to get rid of the placentas, to be honest – they've been laying around since the summer and they're starting to honk a bit.
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[story by Stuart Heritage]