All week long celebrity gossip sites around the globe keep a running tab of stars fucking up. And they’re always fucking up, aren’t they? Left and right. But only one can take the crown as this week’s biggest fuck up! Which is it: Kris Jenner actually still being alive, Lindsay Lohan letting her tits go to shit, Katy Perry and John Mayer actually going through with this thing?
See? Totally valid question. So without further ado, I give you — This Week’s Biggest Fuck Ups.
Katy Perry and John Mayer Gross PDA
Yeah, sure, we were already pretty positive that this Katy Perry and John Mayer thing was actually a thing. But damn! I was still clinging to the hope that it wasn’t! And after seeing these ooky pictures of the couple in the middle of some mega awkward, ?full blown PDA, I’m gonna have ?to flush my eyeballs with bleach. Y’all fucked up!
Lindsay Lohans Boobies
Holy mother of god, what the hell happened to LiLo’s notoriously fine titties? SPOILER: Lots of bad shit apparently. Seriously though, at 26 years old there’s no reason why her formerly glorious melons should be hanging out by her belly button. I mean “no reason” aside from excessive drugs, smoking, and not ever wearing a damn bra. Lindsay managing to fuck up the thing we like about her most (boobs), is really fucked up!
Teen Mom’s New Single Music Video
http://youtu.be/QJuu_4SR8-Y
Just last week Teen Mom Farrah released a single. It was all kinds of awful. Actually, it was every kind of awful. This week she’s back with a music video for her second single. It’s brutal. In fact, now that I think about it… don’t watch it. You shouldn’t subject your eyes and ear to such horrors. Yes, it is truly THAT fucked up!
Kris Jenner Is Still Alive
On Monday night, ‘RIP Kris Jenner’ was trending. Unfortunately, it was just a hoax. She’s still alive! Knowing Kris and fame whore ways, I bet she was behind the whole thing in the first place. And you know what? She shouldn’t to toy with our emotions like that — it aint right! In fact, it’s fucked up.
So… who deserves the title of This Week’s Biggest Fuck Up? Yes, I’d rather break up the crown and give each contestant a piece to remind them of their fuck uppery, but that’s just not how the world works. YOU MUST CHOOSE!