The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, Weekend Box Office, Meh

It’s the summer! And the summer means giant, all-conquering weekend box office monoliths, right?

Well, not really. In fact, the way things are shaping up, 2008 might just be the summer of hopelessly underperforming would-be blockbusters. Let’s hope so, because that’d amuse us a bit more.

Why all the doom and gloom? Because The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, this summer’s third blockbuster and the sequel to the huge The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe, has topped the weekend box office with a disappointing gross about $20 million shy of expectations. Indiana Jones, you’re next.

This could be shaping up to be a terribly disappointing summer weekend, box office-wise. Although Iron Man opened so gigantically that everyone thought this’d be a bumper year, the one-two punch of Speed Racer shitting the bed and now The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian doing worse than expected has got the doom-mongers rubbing their hands together and mongering away like their lives depended on it.

And they could be right; the Indiana Jones movie is getting some dreadful reviews - as is Sex And The City - and the fact that The Dark Knight stars a freaky dead guy might just prove off-putting too.

But for now let’s focus on The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian, which has underwhelmed due to either a) everyone playing GTA IV, b) nobody caring about Prince Caspian due to its lack of witches and wardrobes or c) since making The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe, Walden Media has been dedicated to throwing out bad fantasy crap every couple of weeks, and who’d pay to watch something made by the same people who paid for Bridge To Terabithia?

Still, let’s hope that The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian didn’t disappoint too much - we’re praying that this doesn’t hurt the chances of The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Horse And His Boy getting turned into a film. Horses and boys? That’s box office gold right there.

Anyway, here’s this week’s US weekend box office top five…

1 - The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (The real reason that The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian disappointed at the weekend box office? Because the annoying big-toothed kid from The Lion, The Witch And The Wardrobe is now an annoying big-toothed young lady. And you know you’re in trouble when you can’t even count on the paedo vote) $56,573,000

2 - Iron Man (Of course, if The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian was really serious about getting a good opening weekend box office, it should have followed Iron Man’s lead and had a bit at the end where Samuel L Jackson’s all like “Hey Edmund! Get ready for some deep shit, motherfucker - Lord Rhoop’s in the next film and some shit.”) $31,200,000

3 - What Happens In Vegas (You know what else happens in Vegas? Toni Braxton has a series of terrifying heart scares) $13,850,000

4 - Speed Racer (Of course, at least The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian still has something going for it - it isn’t Speed Racer. Aha ha ha ha ha. Oh, Speed Racer) $7,645,000

5 - Baby Mama (Dear Hollywood, please release more than one film a week, because if we have to write about Baby Mama for another week we might just cry ourselves into dust) $4,593,000

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Weekend Box Office - Box Office Mojo