There's a lot of talk about the third season of Desperate Housewives being less rubbish than the second, although if producers chose to stick an endoscope up a goat's rectum and leave it there for 23 weeks it'd still be a bit more interesting.
However, it looks as if the Desperate Housewives producers have already hit a wall; the ginger one out of Desperate Housewives – or Marcia Cross as she inexplicably prefers to be called – has just announced that she is pregnant. This means we can expect most of Marcia Cross' dramatic Desperate Housewives season three moments to take place with her expanding belly hidden, like the scene where she confronts her wayward son while standing up to her boobs in a puddle.
Who's your favourite one from Desperate Housewives? The one with the eyepatch? The one with the shaved vagina that can be seen from space? The one married to the man who wants to kick Lindsay Lohan's ass? Michael Bolton's girlfriend? The penis-waggle man? Chances are that Marcia Cross is somewhere near the bottom of your list. The others all have more obvious appeal, be it to perverts who remember the Superman TV show, perverts who can't remember Superman but still buy Maxim a lot, or, er, William H Macy and Michael Bolton. But what does Marcia Cross have? Marcia Cross has nice hair and that's about it. But, hey, at least someone loves her. It was only in June that Marcia Cross got married to some sort of stockbroker man, and Eva Longoria said at the time that:
"She's over the moon. I'm so excited for her. It's so beautiful to see her this happy and so in love."
And soon it'll be so beautiful to watch Marcia Cross throwing up in her Desperate Housewives dressing room sink every morning while staggering about on her swollen ankles and getting shirty with people who won't give up their seat for her – publicists have announced that Marcia Cross is pregnant with her first baby. There's no word from Marcia Cross or her husband just yet, but their baby is expected to be delivered in April, leaving Marcia Cross more than half a year to think of new ways to defend her rubbish TV show before nature takes over.
Yesterday we mentioned what a struggle it is for the stars of Lost to try and keep a higher profile than the show they work for. However, it's good to know that in the world of Desperate Housewives, a ginger woman not having a baby for another seven months immediately becomes a billion times more exciting than anything we've seen on the show ever.
Read more:
Marcia Cross is Pregnant – People
[story by Stuart Heritage]