Folded:

• Big name celebrities on meth! (check ‘em out!)
• Conan the Barbarian Special Edition on DVD for £3 (totally worth it for Arnie’s commentary: “How did I get billing over James Earl Jones?”)
• Those loveable brothel ladies from the W.I (they did have fun with the working girls in Nevada, didn’t they? Pity journalist Nicky Taylor had to stay in England mopping up jizz)
• Joe Cornish’s Quantum of Solace theme song (why aren’t Adam and Joe on TV much anymore? It’s all wrong)
• Dizzee Rascal looking all of fourteen in his Dance Wiv Me video (with Calvin Harris at the uni bar refusing to serve him drinks. Cute)

Creased:

• Customer service in the UK (things happen; busses are late, trains break down, but would it kill someone to say ‘sorry’ just once?)
• Gabriella Cilmi, DOB: 10/10/91 (watch her Sweet About Me video and you’ll curse the day you were born – in other words you’ll wish it was about ten years later)
• The taxi meter (marvellous invention that never charges the same amount twice; not even for exactly the same distance at exactly the same time of day)
• Natty (no fucking idea who this fella is, we’re just sick of seeing his infomercial advert)
• The X-Files: I Want To Believe (Chris Carter will make you change that sentiment)

Psst.

Psst. You. Hey! Do you like nineties sci-fi TV shows about a couple of FBI agents who should have been boning each other senseless but never got round to it because they were too busy chasing/not believing in (delete as applicable) UFOs and aliens? If so, then, boy, have we got a treat for you.

Some wag, it seems, has secretly filmed a sneak preview of the upcoming X-Files movie sequel, due for release this July. And whaddaya know – despite being a horribly low-quality clip – it's actually enough to wipe hecklerspray's memory of the awful last few seasons of the show. Why, there's nary a T-1000 in sight!

What you will find, however, is Gillian Anderson digging something mysterious up in the snow, David Duchovny running around looking anxious, and a white-haired Billy Connolly pretending to be some sort of mysterious bad guy. Intriguing, you say? It is, rather, isn't it?