Vince Vaughn - HecklerSpray

Vince Vaughn & Glenn Beck to Create Worst TV Show Ever

December 11th, 2012 By Chris Starr

Name the two most annoying people you can think of. Statistics show there’s a one-in-six chance you just named Vince Vaughn and Glenn Beck (Adam Sandler also comes high in the probability table). Great job guys! You’ve just named the two people who are about to executive produce a new reality show!

It’s like all our Christmases have come at once, except that instead of presents we have cluster bombs and instead of Santa we have a gargoyle who eats baby children. And the bow on the top of the present is the fact that this is a reality show. Because all reality shows are Emmy-nominated pieces of brilliance.

Vince Vaughn Has A Baby, Proving That Idiots Get Sex Too

December 21st, 2010 By Mof Gimmers

Picture the scene. A grotty bed somewhere, filled ably by a naked Vince Vaughn. Beneath him, somewhere, is a woman covered in a thin film of Vaughn’s sweat. She stares him in the eye, clenching her teeth as he rides her like a stolen moped. All the while, Vaughn mugs to a nearby mirror. He ejaculates and yells “I’m the hilarious Vince Vaughn!” And lo! A child was born!

That’s right. Astounding idiots have sex. Rich idiots probably have so much sex that they need a special ointment to treat genital blisters. And of course, they have children too and Vince Vaughn has become a father for the first time.

Vaughn’s soon-to-be long-suffering wife, Kyla Weber, gave birth to a baby girl in Chicago on Saturday. In true celebrity fashion, they have chosen a ridiculous name for their new faeces factory (that’s all babies are initially, eh?) – Locklyn Kyla Vaughn.

Couples Retreat – Movie Review

August 5th, 2012 By David Scarborough

Not really a refreshing vacation, Couples Retreat. Instead, expect the kind of thrills you’d get on a wet summer’s day in Butlins.

Starting off well, Couples Retreat sees Vince Vaughn dream up an idea about a holiday resort for couples – who get to indulge in the fine food, the bright blue water and the pristine sands, but only after they have finished partaking in the non-negotiable therapy courses. Hilarity should ensue, and at first it looks set to do just that.

Couples Retreat Tops Weekend Box Office, Despite Looking Awful

October 11th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Good for Vince Vaughn. After Fred Claus and Four Christmases, people thought he could only make godawful Christmas films.

But who's laughing now? Couples Retreat – the newest Vince Vaughn movie – is the number one movie at the weekend box office, so take that everyone. Couples Retreat has proved once and for all that Vince Vaughn doesn't only make godawful Christmas films – he makes godawful films that are completely independent of traditional religious festivals, as well. Vince Vaughn wins again!

Oh, and Couples Retreat co-star Jon Favreau wins again, too! God knows how badly that man needed a hit movie.

Vince Vaughn Gets Engaged To Kyla Weber, Whoever She Is

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

You know what makes Vince Vaughn horny? Property. Make Vince watch Location Location Location and he’ll start dry-humping whatever’s closest to him.

Probably. And Vince Vaughn’s possibly-fictitious property fetish goes even further – not only do we expect that he often rubs his groin up and down the kitchen section of Habitat, but he’s also just got engaged to real estate agent Kyla Weber.

Amusingly, the details of Vince Vaughn’s engagement are spectacularly vague – but all that matters is that Vince Vaughn is happy. And also that Jennifer Aniston will have definitely railroaded John Mayer into getting engaged to her by teatime.

Four Christmases Inexplicably Tops Weekend Box Office Again

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

People must like indentikit Vince Vaughn movies more than we thought – Four Christmases is still top of the weekend box office.

It just goes to show – at this time of year, moviegoers like nothing more than to snuggle down and enjoy lighthearted festive japes starring two of America’s most recognisable comic stars. That’s why Four Christmases has topped the US weekend box office for the second week running.

Well, it’s either that or because the most high-profile movie released on Friday was Punisher: War Zone, a film that looks as if it’s almost aggressively bumhole. Either one’s fine.

Four Christmases Yammers To Top Of Weekend Box Office

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Good news – Vince Vaughn’s new movie Four Christmases has done better at the weekend box office than his last Christmas movie Fred Claus.

In fact, Four Christmases has done so much better that it’s the top movie at the US weekend box office this week, beating off cultish vampire phenomenons, big-budget historical epics and dumb actioners alike.

That’s great news for Vince Vaughn and the cast and crew of Four Christmases, but don’t think that first paragraph was a compliment – just to add a little bit of perspective, here’s a list of other things that are better than Fred Claus: Bridge To Terabithia, I Now Pronounce You Chuck And Larry, Alvin And The Chipmunks, YouTube videos of people getting injured, genital herpes, crying pensioners, papercuts and smacking yourself about the face with a brick. Doesn’t make Four Christmases look so good in comparison, does it?

Reese Witherspoon: Vince Vaughn Isn’t An Unfunny Turdbag

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

One movie out this week is Four Christmases – the second part in Vince Vaughn’s trilogy of inexplicably awful Christmas films.

But Four Christmases isn’t just any old inescapably terrible Vince Vaughn Christmas film. No, Four Christmases is the Christmas film where Vince Vaughn and his co-star Reese Witherspoon apparently decided that they absolutely hated each other during filming, making the shoot a nightmare for everybody involved.

Except if you ask Reese Witherspoon about that, she’ll tell you it’s all hooey. Looking to dispel those rumours, Reese Witherspoon has come forward to say that she didn’t hate Vince Vaughn at all, and that he’s the funniest actor she’s ever worked with. Reese should be careful what she says; Jennifer Aniston once thought the same about Vince Vaughn and look what happened to her – John Mayer. Gree.

Fred Claus Star Vince Vaughn Somehow Named Most Valuable Actor

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

You want success? Try playing exactly the same yammering, flab-faced huckster character in every film you star in.

It seems to work for Vince Vaughn, because he’s just been named as Forbes‘ most valuable actor. For every dollar that Vince Vaughn was paid for Dodgeball, The Break-Up and Wedding Crashers, he pulled in $14.71 of gross income for his studios.

That’s impressive stuff, and Vince Vaughn should be incredibly proud of his achievements. Speaking of which, Vince Vaughn should also be incredibly proud next year when Forbes calculates his salary against Fred Claus and that awful-looking Christmas movie he’s making with Reese Witherspoon and names him as its most overpaid one-note, off-script, pointlessly rambling unfunny egobeast.

Vince Vaughn Still Yammering On About Jennifer Aniston

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Nobody talks about The Break-Up any more, mainly for fear that it'll trigger some sort of psychotic post-traumatic stress malarkey and they'll end up with a nosebleed.

But just because The Break-Up was so dire that it makes us want to vomit poo into an elf's face, it doesn't mean that its stars Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston don't get along. In fact, although they spilt up in 2006, Vince Vaughn has told Parade magazine that he's still great friends with Jennifer Aniston.

If this means there's going to be a sequel to The Break-Up any time soon, so help us…