Grown Up Gossip & Internet Villainy
Born in Belgium with Northern Irish heritage, Stella Maxwell is a Victoria’s Secret Angel. Which means she needs to be seen naked. Right now.
Raised in Belgium until her early teens, Maxwell moved to Australia and New Zealand, where she was discovered as a model. In 2016, she was voted #1 in Maxim’s Hot 100 list. Which is actually rather surprising.
We also weren’t super impressed with her walk and think she should take some lessons from Gisele, Doutzen or Candice. She IS quite pretty though.
If a super computer were going to build the perfect Swedish supermodel, it would probably end with a woman who looks a lot like Elsa Hosk.
The lanky blonde Victoria’s Secret model was discovered while in high school but didn’t take her modeling career seriously she had spent two years playing basketball for the Swedish equivalent to the WNBA. She then won the 2012 season of Sweden’s Top Model, which included an introduction to Victoria’s Secret.
Since then, Hosk has appeared in the annual Victoria’s Secret’s fashion show and in 2015 was named on of the Victoria’s Secret “Angels.” Which really just means you wear oversized white angel wings while you model skimpy lingerie that push up your boobs.
You probably seen the Victoria’s Secret catalog before and thought damn, this chick is smoking hot. Boys and girls, it’s time to see Alessandra Ambrosio nude.
Born to parents of Italian and Polisn ancestry in Brazil, Ambrosio is 174 cm (5′ 8″) tall and she began modeling at the age of 12. She’s done some TV shows, mainly appearing as herself because her actual life is more awesome than any role they could create.
You look beautiful. You’re adored by millions. You are paid millions to wear sexy lingerie that makes people love you even more and you’re doing all this while traveling the world with beautiful girlfriends like Gisele Bundchen and Adriana Lima. Wow.
The annual Victoria’s Secret fashion show happened in Paris this week and it airs this coming Monday, and, honestly, I’m incredibly stoked to watch it. Watching hot skinny bitches in lingerie I can’t afford is legitimately how I like to start my holiday season, as bizarre as that sounds.
Aside from the fact the whole thing is just beautiful women walking around half naked while super talented musicians perform, there are actually some really pop culture relevant reasons to tune in this year specifically!
Adriana Lima is probably the greatest Victoria Secret Angel of all time. She’s the hottest Brazilian supermodel ever and she believes in sex after marriage. Wife material? You bet.
While other women are straight-up beautiful, Adriana Lima sizzles with a certain kind of sexual intensity that’s one in a million. Look up the definition of the word ‘sultry’ in a dictionary and you’ll find her face. The basketball player who made her his wife is a lucky dude envied by millions. Just look at how this girl walks.
Miranda Kerr is one of the most beautiful women alive. That’s a fact. She’s got a heart-warming smile, super cute dimples, a gorgeous face, perfect hair, amazing eyes and a stunning body that’s tight/slim/nubile. Too much perfection. No wonder she has her fair share of haters.
We tried really hard but couldn’t find any physical flaws. Like Candice Swanepoel, she’s beautiful, thin, sexy and cute at the same time. No, her elbows are not pointy and she’s not a difficult person. Orlando Bloom was a fool and didn’t know what he lost. Just look at this video. Can you find anything better?
Former Victoria’s Secret Angel Doutzen Kroes is a beautiful Dutch model. She’s blonde haired, blue-eyed and 5 ft 9 inches (1.75m) tall. We think she’s totally fab.
One of the few all natural beauties, Kroes is married to a DJ and is a mother to a boy and girl. It’s pretty crazy how good she manages to look after two pregnancies. Usually some women hit the wall and start slacking off but not Doutzen. Just look at her on the catwalk.
Yes, she’s nowhere close to Queen Gisele when it comes to power walks but she’s still hot as hell:
Former Victoria Secret Angel Erin Heatherton isn’t shy about getting naked. She’s done it in several magazine photoshoots and candid photos from her phone were leaked online in Sept 2014.
You’re either a fan of Heatherton or not. We think she’s hot because she’s tall (6 ft) and her freckles are super cute. They’ve become an adorable defining feature of her face. Freckles ARE hot. But only if you’re a hot blonde girl. Doesn’t apply to awkward boys.
She’s really pretty although in a completely different way from Candice Swanepoel, her fellow Victoria’s Secret angel. She’s a personable, down-to-earth girl-next-door that isn’t super intimidating. Kinda similar to the equally hot Brooklyn Decker, right?
Eternally disappointing fellow bony hip humper, Leonardo DiCaprio, Adam Levine went ahead this weekend and married one of the many models he’s bedded.? Even after having the skim milk, some guys do end up still wanting to buy the skinny cow.
Most surprising of all though was that Levine managed to make it all the way down the aisle without tripping and landing inside one of the Victoria’s Secret model bridesmaids.?? Snaps to that, Adam.
Adam Levine is the typical rock star.? He lives on a diet of fame and model crotch.? While he can sing about love like he really means it, he’s kind of a douchebag when it comes to the women he has dated.
But since he’s decided to stick with one woman for the rest of his life (or about a year at most), he wants to make amends with all the scorned women of his past.?? And they couldn’t care less.
