Although we suspect that fans of Katy Perry and Gym Class Heroes are already great at coping with disappointment, they probably should brace themselves anyway.

You see Katy Perry and her Gym Class Hero boyfriend Travis McCoy have apparently split up, just weeks after they apparently got engaged. It’s all very sad and, as yet, nobody knows who’ll take custody of their one good song.

The split seems to have hit Travis McCoy particularly hard, as his recent angry blog entries have proved. Honestly, what sort of pathetic loser sits around all day filling the internet with vicious hatred? Oh.

It’s never easy to maintain a relationship when you’re in the public eye, and it can be even harder when you’re desperately doing everything you can to stay in the public eye despite being such an obvious one hit wonder that people often mistake you for the illegitimate offspring of Billy Ray Cyrus and one of The Weather Girls.

And that’s why we’re not particularly surprised by the news that Katy Perry and her boyfriend Travis McCoy have split up. Between twatting about with knives, pretending to have a secret crush on Scarlett Johansson and doing everything short of literally kidnapping an actual child to remind everyone that she still exists, Katy Perry can’t have had too much time to concentrate on McCoy.

And now it’s all over. The News Of The World reports that Katy Perry and Travis McCoy gave themselves a make-or-break Christmas trip to Mexico, but not even spending time together in an environment primarily consisting of cacti, uncomfortable heat and millions of little hairy men could keep them together:

My source told me: “It’s sad, but they were fighting a lot in recent months because they never saw each other. When somebody becomes very famous very quickly their relationship usually suffers. She’s going through such a huge time at the moment so needs to be on her own.” [Travis] raged at Katy on his blog… “My Laptop is my new b***h, LOYAL, LISTENS, and NEVER LETS ME DOWN!”

No wonder Travis McCoy is so upset – it can be difficult for a man when his girlfriend becomes more successful than him. And remember that Katy Perry has got one song that some people know the title of even though none of them could sing it all the way through even if you put a gun to their heads, which makes her about 4,000 times successful than Travis.

However, what does make this split slightly unusual is that less than a month ago we reported that Katy Perry and Travis McCoy were engaged. And now it’s all off. It just goes to show that things move fast in Katy Perry’s world. Again, that doesn’t come as much of a surprise, though – if Katy Perry can cram an entire musical career into about a month and a half, then getting engaged and splitting up within 18 days must be a titting cakewalk for her.

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Katy: I Dissed A Boy - News Of The World

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Credit where credit’s due – for a one-hit wonder, Katy Perry’s awfully good at staying in the news, isn’t she?

This time, Katy Perry has managed to sneak back into the headlines for possibly getting engaged to her boyfriend Travis McCoy. Possibly, you understand – nobody knows for sure, making them the Jay-Z and Beyonce that nobody gives a stuff about.

Strangely, this engagement coincides with that Katy Perry pop video that’s all about her wedding, showing the extent that Katy Perry pop videos can foretell the future. So fingers crossed that her next video involves her retiring from music while she’s still got some dignity left.

Katy Perry knows the value of a good shock tactic. She shot to fame with a gender-bending song about kissing girls, then she dicked about with a knife until the press spluttered into its tea and made her apologise. And her new single’s entitled Hot N Cold, which is dangerous and shocking because it’s about how Katy Perry thinks the lack of temperature regulation in menopausal women is hilarious. Or something. Look, we don’t bloody know.

And now Katy Perry is ready to reveal her most shocking stunt yet – she’s getting married. To a boy. Possibly. We’re not accepting it as fact yet because Katy Perry hasn’t officially confirmed it yet. However, sources inside of Katy Perry’s mouth seem to think that it’s pretty much a done deal, as MTV reports:

Rumours in the New York Daily News claim that her boyfriend, Gym Class Heroes lead singer Travis McCoy Katy and Travis have been dating since last year and it seems Travis has popped the big question on a recent visit to the romantic city of Paris. Reports claim that on a recent visit to the French capital, McCoy kissed Perry with a diamond ring in his mouth which led to the proposal.

Ah, the old ‘saliva-coated choking hazard’ proposal technique – is there anything as romantic? No there isn’t. Unless you count putting an engagement ring up your bum and then farting it into your girlfriend’s eye, but that has problems of its own. We won’t be doing that again, no sirree.

But still, cynics that we are, we’re still over the moon for Katy Perry and Travis McCoy from Gym Class Heroes. Fingers crossed that they hurry up the aisle as soon as possible, because that way they’ll finally get to achieve their dream of becoming a one-and-a-half hit family.

However, we can’t help feeling that marriage and domestic happiness will hurt Katy Perry’s credibility as an edgy songwriter in performer. It’s all very well her singing songs about kissing girls and whatnot now, but in a couple of years when she’s faced with the back to back failure of her singles I Went To Habitat And I Liked It and I Found A Smashing Three For Two Deal On Yogurts At Morrisons And I Liked It, there’s a chance that Katy Perry might regret her decision.

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