Being a student might give you a degree printed on a fancy bit of paper, but the three years studying for it can be a bit of a drag. There are highs when most nights-out consist of getting drunk for less than £5.
However, when it comes to vomiting up your insides the next morning, some people regret drinking cheap Hungarian Vodka that’s laced with lead.
After graduation, most students realise that the three years spent earning a degree in “advance shelf construction” was a waste of time all whilst having a huge debt to pay off.
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Jessica Simpson says her dad didn’t fit her for her first training bra.
Let’s face it, no one ever thought that he did. In fact, we all went about blissfully without ever having thought about it at all. But now that the topic has been broached and your day has been ruined by the mental image, all we can think is “Joe Simpson fit his daughter for a training bra?? Ewwww…” That, and, “We missed a story about Joe Simpson fitting his daughter for a training bra??”
We apologise for missing such an important, vomit-inducing piece of journalism. It shall not happen again. We will be the first to supply you with details when Joe Simpson details accounts of fitting his daughter for her second and third training bras, as well as every subsequent regular bra up to the present.
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Prince William knows only too well that being second in line to the throne has its perks.
For instance, when you're going to be King Of England all sorts of lovely young girls routinely throw themselves at you even though you're an uppity rugby tosser with insane male pattern baldness, a near-incomprehensible speaking voice and a face like a pre-kiln Toby jug of an Easter Island statue made by the blind lady from that Lionel Richie video. Plus people let you fly fighter planes.
That's basically what we're getting at – someone's decided to let Prince William fly a fighter plane. That's about it.
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