Articles tagged with: Topless
Hef Says Merry Xmas Via Karissa And Kristina Shannon’s Norks
You can stick all this baby Jesus nonsense up your wazoo - nobody knows the true meaning of Christmas more that Hugh Hefner. And that's that Christmas is a time when even the world's most frail-looking 82-year-old man can live out his increasingly creepy wish-fulfilment fantasies by posing with two 19-year-old twins who've had their boobs slathered with paint. And thanks to Karissa and Kristina Shannon, that's exactly what Hugh Hefner got to do - Hugh's Christmas card this year features him standing between the bodypainted Karissa and Kristina Shannon with a facial expression situated somewhere between 'smug' and 'kidnap victim'. God bless us, every one.
You can stick all this baby Jesus nonsense up your wazoo - nobody knows the true meaning of Christmas more that Hugh Hefner. And that's that Christmas is a time when even the world's most frail-looking 82-year-old man can live out his increasingly creepy wish-fulfilment fantasies by posing with two 19-year-old twins who've had their boobs slathered with paint. And thanks to Karissa and Kristina Shannon, that's exactly what Hugh Hefner got to do - Hugh's Christmas card this year features him standing between the bodypainted Karissa and Kristina Shannon with a facial expression situated somewhere between 'smug' and 'kidnap victim'. God bless us, every one.
Amy Winehouse Goes Topless! Merry Christmas!
Right, whichever one of you wrote to Santa asking to see what Amy Winehouse's boobs look like, you've got detention for a month. Thanks to you, someone's taken a load of photos of Amy Winehouse topless on holiday and spread them across the internet like some sort of obscene dirty protest. However, the good news is that Amy Winehouse looks less like the emaciated hollow-eyed wreck we've all seen in the papers for the last 18 months and more like an actual human. The bad news is that they're pictures of Amy Winehouse topless. How much worse do you want? Jesus.
Right, whichever one of you wrote to Santa asking to see what Amy Winehouse's boobs look like, you've got detention for a month. Thanks to you, someone's taken a load of photos of Amy Winehouse topless on holiday and spread them across the internet like some sort of obscene dirty protest. However, the good news is that Amy Winehouse looks less like the emaciated hollow-eyed wreck we've all seen in the papers for the last 18 months and more like an actual human. The bad news is that they're pictures of Amy Winehouse topless. How much worse do you want? Jesus.
Nooooo! Our Eyes! Kerry Katona Goes Topless!
Take a portion of rice, cup full of chilli powder, nine cans of lager, a large packet of chips, cup of curry sauce from the local Chinese takeaway, a couple of mints and what do you get? Vomit-induced fun! Mmm, all those undigested chunks floating around in a river of brown liquid either in the middle of the street, the next door neighbour’s neatly trimmed lawn or your mate’s bed. Whilst the above combination is the result of typical student bids to be wacky and impressive, everyone can now experience the thrill of choking on their own sick. You see, everyone’s favourite reality TV star Kerry Katona has decided to show the world her boobs. Well, we’ve got to work one way or another. Even if it puts the health of the nation at risk.
Take a portion of rice, cup full of chilli powder, nine cans of lager, a large packet of chips, cup of curry sauce from the local Chinese takeaway, a couple of mints and what do you get? Vomit-induced fun! Mmm, all those undigested chunks floating around in a river of brown liquid either in the middle of the street, the next door neighbour’s neatly trimmed lawn or your mate’s bed. Whilst the above combination is the result of typical student bids to be wacky and impressive, everyone can now experience the thrill of choking on their own sick. You see, everyone’s favourite reality TV star Kerry Katona has decided to show the world her boobs. Well, we’ve got to work one way or another. Even if it puts the health of the nation at risk.
Megan Fox Drinks Vinegar, Takes Her Top Off and Pretends to be a Lesbian
Going directly against the orders of Michael Bay, Megan Fox seems to be doing exactly the opposite to piling on some poundage. Whereas the explosion-loving director ordered every young boy in the world's wet dream to put some weight on for Transformers 2, the actress has revealed that she instead decides to clean herself out with vinegar. No, we have no idea either. But, reports have flooded in on all the websites you would hope to print them - namely the ones aimed at already-image-conscious young teenage girls, who are now likely to think that drinking vinegar is a viable dieting option. What a great example these Hollywood types set each and every day.
Going directly against the orders of Michael Bay, Megan Fox seems to be doing exactly the opposite to piling on some poundage. Whereas the explosion-loving director ordered every young boy in the world's wet dream to put some weight on for Transformers 2, the actress has revealed that she instead decides to clean herself out with vinegar. No, we have no idea either. But, reports have flooded in on all the websites you would hope to print them - namely the ones aimed at already-image-conscious young teenage girls, who are now likely to think that drinking vinegar is a viable dieting option. What a great example these Hollywood types set each and every day.
Disney To Miley Cyrus: Back To Work, Paedo-Bait
Ever since she posed for those provocative sort-of topless underage Vanity Fair photos, Miley Cyrus has left her wholesome tween image far behind. But try telling that to Disney. Even though she seems more comfortable these days posing vulnerably under satin sheets and draping herself over her father's lap in an uncomfortably sexual way, Miley Cyrus is still one of Disney's biggest cash cows. And that's why the corporation has refused to scrap Miley's upcoming concert set for Saturday. However, in a nod to the effect of the scandal and her new audience, Disney has staged a last-minute change of venue for the concert. Now, instead of performing at the sun-dappled Disney World Resort in Orlando, Miley Cyrus will be appearing at a grotty underground basement in front of an audience comprised soley of raincoat-wearing middle-aged, yellow-eyed, nicotine-stained Frenchmen.
Ever since she posed for those provocative sort-of topless underage Vanity Fair photos, Miley Cyrus has left her wholesome tween image far behind. But try telling that to Disney. Even though she seems more comfortable these days posing vulnerably under satin sheets and draping herself over her father's lap in an uncomfortably sexual way, Miley Cyrus is still one of Disney's biggest cash cows. And that's why the corporation has refused to scrap Miley's upcoming concert set for Saturday. However, in a nod to the effect of the scandal and her new audience, Disney has staged a last-minute change of venue for the concert. Now, instead of performing at the sun-dappled Disney World Resort in Orlando, Miley Cyrus will be appearing at a grotty underground basement in front of an audience comprised soley of raincoat-wearing middle-aged, yellow-eyed, nicotine-stained Frenchmen.
Annie Leibovitz Says Sorry About Miley Cyrus, Sort Of
There's an angry mob forming over those 'topless' Miley Cyrus pictures in Vanity Fair - but the question is, whose house shall we burn down first? We can't burn down Miley Cyrus' house because she's already apologised to her fans and blamed all the evil grown-ups for exploiting her - so that just leaves Annie Leibovitz, the woman who took the photos of Miley Cyrus in the first place. Let's get her! Except we can't, because Annie Leibovitz has apologised for the Miley Cyrus photos as well. OK, maybe 'apologised' is a strong word - instead Annie Leibovitz has called everyone stupid for not appreciating the beauty of her art, but she phrased it like an apology. An apology that we accept. We think. Oh, we're so confused. Let's burn down the camera factories!
There's an angry mob forming over those 'topless' Miley Cyrus pictures in Vanity Fair - but the question is, whose house shall we burn down first? We can't burn down Miley Cyrus' house because she's already apologised to her fans and blamed all the evil grown-ups for exploiting her - so that just leaves Annie Leibovitz, the woman who took the photos of Miley Cyrus in the first place. Let's get her! Except we can't, because Annie Leibovitz has apologised for the Miley Cyrus photos as well. OK, maybe 'apologised' is a strong word - instead Annie Leibovitz has called everyone stupid for not appreciating the beauty of her art, but she phrased it like an apology. An apology that we accept. We think. Oh, we're so confused. Let's burn down the camera factories!
Miley Cyrus Topless Photo: The Dim-Witted Apology
Paedophile wish-fulfillment tweenbot Miley Cyrus is at it again - and this time her 15-year-old breasts are coming along for the ride too. As if the recent internet photos of Miley Cyrus whipping her bra out around rolling on a boy's lap in her underwear weren't enough, now the web is abuzz with a brand new picture - a picture that shows Miley Cyrus completely topless, or at least as topless as you can be when you're covered in a blanket. And what's more, this topless Miley Cyrus photo was taken for well-known spank rag Vanity Fair by that filthy pornographer Annie Leibovitz. OK, so what actually happened was that one of the world's most famous photographers took a picture of Miley Cyrus that isn't really very naked in the slightest. But, hey, that hasn't stopped Miley Cyrus from apologising for it, the stupid teenage twit.
Paedophile wish-fulfillment tweenbot Miley Cyrus is at it again - and this time her 15-year-old breasts are coming along for the ride too. As if the recent internet photos of Miley Cyrus whipping her bra out around rolling on a boy's lap in her underwear weren't enough, now the web is abuzz with a brand new picture - a picture that shows Miley Cyrus completely topless, or at least as topless as you can be when you're covered in a blanket. And what's more, this topless Miley Cyrus photo was taken for well-known spank rag Vanity Fair by that filthy pornographer Annie Leibovitz. OK, so what actually happened was that one of the world's most famous photographers took a picture of Miley Cyrus that isn't really very naked in the slightest. But, hey, that hasn't stopped Miley Cyrus from apologising for it, the stupid teenage twit.
