top 10 - HecklerSpray

Top 10 Instructional Training Raps

August 4th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

Bless the dung-minded simpletons who look at hip hop and think, “Ah! That looks easy! Its just talking over a hip hop beat! What idiot couldn’t do that? I talk all the time! I was pretty good at thinking of words that rhyme too!”

Some of these people often take this very silly notion and apply it to learning. “Kids love rap! I need them to learn! Rapping? Learning? INSTRUCTIONAL RAP! It’s a schooling miracle!”

And so, throughout the 80s (and regrettably beyond), there has been a spate of instructional rap videos, designed to be ‘educational’ and ‘fun’, usually falling way short of both marks. Sadly for them, they didn’t realise that rapping is one of the most insanely difficult things to do. Mercifully for this post, this didn’t stop them. So welcome to a world of rap-audits, fried chicken flexidiscs and martial arts rhymes (and not in a Wu Tang way).

Top 10 Monkees Songs (RIP Davy Jones)

August 4th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

With the sad passing of Davy Jones (okay, he was the least likeable of The Monkees, but he’s A Monkee fercryinoutloud!) it only seems fair to pay some kind of tribute to him and the band that made him a star.

No. His brief spot on a popular British soap doesn’t count.

And so, to avoid been overly sentimental fans, we’ve decided to simply let the music do the talking and push our worthless opinion in your face. Basically, here are the ten best tracks by The Monkees and as ever, you’re advised to tell us about your favourite songs either through the comments or through various social networking technology.

Top 10 Most Entirely Unreasonable Celebrity Couples

February 14th, 2012 By Sophie Hall

Ah love. We love it. But not as much as celebrity couples who love it more! Or at least maybe murmer to Max Clifford that those M&S microwave asparagus rissottos aren’t going to heat up in their houses with no electricity by themselves.

Love is all you need.

Everybody says it. John Lennon says it. Richard Curtis got a fridge magnet of it and then based an entire career around it. We’re not really sure what the hell’s going on to be honest. Suffice to say, it’s the hecklerspray Top 10 Most.. GOD KNOWS WHAT THEY WERE THINKING! Celebrity Couples list!

Super Bowl 2012: Top Ten Big Game Commercials

August 7th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

You may think the Super Bowl is all about a sporting event, but you’re wrong. It’s all about television and, specifically, the adverts that litter the game. American Football is the perfect sport for the advertising exec.

Why?

Well, not only is America filled with vain, greedy sporting superstars who are willing to shill to the highest bidder, but American Football is also filled with stop/start action and, for every stop, there’s a chance for a television advert. To many, the commercials are the whole reason for tuning in. IMAGINE! Anyway, if you can’t be bother with all that sport cluttering up a perfectly good break, here’s the ten best Super Bowl big game commercials.

Top 10 Retro Cartoons

November 29th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

The word retro is often misused. People tend to mean ‘old’, rather than something new, that looks vintage. That’s what retro is. Anyway, we got thinking about retro things and, in particular, cartoons.

That’s because cartoons are the best thing ever, ever, EVER.

Of course, there was a golden age of cartoons with Bugs Bunny, Tom & Jenny, Roadrunner et all, providing us with snappy jokes, immediate punchlines and amazing, hair-raising action! But cartoons didn’t stop being good. In fact, in recent years, some ‘toons have tried to recreate that vintage animation spectacle, capturing the spirit of getting hit in the face with a pan, or better yet, a complete and utter disregard for being remotely realistic. In short, let’s look at the best retro cartoons!

Brian May Thinks You Like Queen Because You’re Common

November 10th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Queen are a terrible band aren’t they? Overblown, pompous, noodly bollocks for people who can’t bring themselves to dance or listen to anything with a trace of funk. They’re so white they’re borderline Aryan.

Still, there’s obviously a huge market of Stock Broker Rock and Queen have hardly struggled throughout their career.

But what is it that people like about them? Well, if you ask Brian May, it’s because they “speak for common people”.

Heidi Klum’s Best Halloween Outfits

October 31st, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Halloween is just about the perfect festival. Why? Well, because there’s no stupid religion involved, you can get as drunk as you like, guilt free.

GUILT FREE!

Better yet, you can get drunk while dressed as a brain-eating zombie. What’s not to like? Apart from trick or treating children. NOTHING. THAT’S WHAT. And someone who really, really enjoys Halloween is Heidi Klum. She makes a real effort this time of year and so, we’re having a look at her best outfits from her Halloween ball.

Hecklerspray’s Top 10 Most Underwhelming “Sexy” Hallowe’en Costumes

October 27th, 2011 By Michael Park

When we make lists, they’re usually pretty easy to do. You just take your own opinion of something, prioritise it and throw it in an article without giving the consequences much thought. As such, we still have people arguing the toss (pun intended) over our ‘Top’ Sci-Fi babes & newscasters.

Of course, some lists aren’t that easy to come up with and require rigorously observed criteria in order to make them acceptable for the delicate eyes of our readers.

Our quest was long and arduous but we got there in the end.

10 British TV Shows Stolen From America

September 20th, 2012 By hecklerspray staff

Americans just can't seem to get enough British TV at the moment. Sherlock, Life on Mars, Antiques Roadshow, Outnumbered, Footballers? Wives, Celebrity Fit Club, Richard Blackwood?s Renaissance Showdown ? they?ll remake practically anything it seems, even British programmes that they've already remade.

First Britain created Pop Idol. Then America snapped it up. Then Britain created The X Factor (essentially the same show as Pop Idol ? but with red). Now America has their very own X Factor (American Idol ? but with red).

The Yanks love bad British TV so much that they've even snapped up Jeremy Kyle to present exactly the same show as the one that he presents here ? but in the US! He might have lost the intense neon blue lighting that made his programme seem like it was being presented from within an ultraviolet fly killer and gained a really small washed-out picture of the New York skyline, but essentially it's the same ? the same types of people, the same completely-unqualified-to-comment-on-anything advice being dished out, etc. Oh, how things were different way back when.

George Harrison’s 10 Best Songs

October 4th, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

Argue all you want, but there’s absolutely no denying that George Harrison is the coolest of The Beatles. John and Paul fought it out for best songwriter while George slid into effortless cool, taking it easy and releasing records as and when he pleased.

How cool was George? He faced everything with a shrug. The Quiet Beatle wrote in his diary in ’69: “Got up went to Twickenham rehearsed until lunchtime ? left the Beatles ? went home, and in the evening did King of Fuh at Trident studio, had chips later.?

And so, with Martin Scorsese’s documentary ‘George Harrison: Living in the Material World’ getting everyone talking about George, let us look at his best music… okay?