Ouch.
It was a bad performance overall, made somewhat worse by that moment, and – for us – the pain was doubled by the fact that we watched the match in the presence of Americans, Italians, Germans and – worst of all – Scottishes.
This meant that it felt exactly like watching a re-run of Bambi with your parents when, just after the little critter begins to walk (our goal), the film is suddenly, inexplicably, replaced by Hardcore Passions Volume Two: Hairy Potter And The Prisoner Of Ass-caban (their ‘goal’).
Ah well, it’s Monday, and that means it’s time for shirking work by discussing whether David James should be the next man to flop uselessly around in goal, and by sweating underneath a feebly-spinning fan while wearing a nylon replica of John Terry‘s shirt. It’s also time for…
YOUR MANGO!
Can we get a ‘whoot’?
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The best thing about being a rootin’-tootin’ country and western singer is that you’re allowed to offend anyone you want – just look at Tim McGraw.
Last week saw the release of a new Tim McGraw album, and Tim McGraw wants everyone to know how completely sorry he is about it. You see, Tim McGraw was upset because the new album was a Greatest Hits collection and it was full of his most famous old songs that people enjoy listening to, rather than the collection of new bad rubbish that he wanted to release.
So, to counter this, Tim McGraw has released a statement showing his anger at the album’s release and pleading with fans not to buy it. And, in turn, Tim McGraw’s record label’s next release will be a collection of Tim McGraw b-sides all performed by crying children trapped down a well with a tuba player and fanged clown.
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Country music is scientifically proven to turn people into violent, woman-beating drunks – or is it just that only violent wife-beating drunks like country music?
Maybe we'll never know for sure, but let's forget the history for a moment and just laugh at the fat, allegedly woman-beating rednecks who go to country music concerts. Like the fat, allegedly woman-beating redneck who country star Tim McGraw hauled up onstage and ejected from a show in Washington on Tuesday night.
Best of all, there's video footage of the incident. An obnoxious fat cowboy who's too fat to be lifted off the ground by three other obnoxious cowboys? Sounds perfect, doesn't it? It's not – the video's got a country music soundtrack. Bleugh.
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Ouch.
