As a former massive-haired gelatine penis-gobbling 1980s naked model, Heather Mills is pretty much class all over.

So, even though it was apparently a fraction of what she hoped to receive, Heather Mills accepted her £24.3 million divorce settlement from Paul McCartney yesterday with nothing but the sort of dignity and grace that could only prove her critics wrong.

What's that? She didn't? In actual fact Heather Mills apparently stormed over to Paul McCartney's divorce lawyer and poured a glass of water over her head? Oh thank god - for a moment there we were worried that all that money had made Heather Mills normal. Perish the thought.