Articles tagged with: The Hills
Stephanie Pratt Arrested For Being A Booze-Soaked Nob
We should be thanking Stephanie Pratt. In these troubled times, it's always nice to have a bit of consistency. And that's what she's provided. Forget about financial ruin or war or ecological destruction - so long as, somewhere in the world, someone from The Hills is acting like an overprivileged nob, then we know that everything is exactly as it should be. And if that means that Stephanie Pratt has to get arrested on suspicion of DUI, then that's what has to happen. Honestly, Stephanie Pratt deserves a medal. Or a jail sentence. Probably just the jail sentence, actually. Medals are quite expensive.
We should be thanking Stephanie Pratt. In these troubled times, it's always nice to have a bit of consistency. And that's what she's provided. Forget about financial ruin or war or ecological destruction - so long as, somewhere in the world, someone from The Hills is acting like an overprivileged nob, then we know that everything is exactly as it should be. And if that means that Stephanie Pratt has to get arrested on suspicion of DUI, then that's what has to happen. Honestly, Stephanie Pratt deserves a medal. Or a jail sentence. Probably just the jail sentence, actually. Medals are quite expensive.
Lauren Conrad’s Stupid Book Turns Into A Stupid Film
The first rule of writing is 'write what you know', but try telling that to Lauren Conrad from The Hills. How could Lauren Conrad write what she knows? She doesn't know anything. Tell Lauren Conrad to write what she knows and she'll end up handing you a Post-It note with 'My doggy looks cute in a hat' written in Crayola on one side and a drawing of what appears to be a thalidomide monkey with a plantpot on its head on the other. Oh, we're just jealous. Lauren Conrad has written a book, and now she's going to turn it into a film. Possibly.
The first rule of writing is 'write what you know', but try telling that to Lauren Conrad from The Hills. How could Lauren Conrad write what she knows? She doesn't know anything. Tell Lauren Conrad to write what she knows and she'll end up handing you a Post-It note with 'My doggy looks cute in a hat' written in Crayola on one side and a drawing of what appears to be a thalidomide monkey with a plantpot on its head on the other. Oh, we're just jealous. Lauren Conrad has written a book, and now she's going to turn it into a film. Possibly.
Audrina Partridge Partially Removes Clothes For Animals
Audrina Partridge loves animals - her surname is a type of animal, plus she stars in The Hills and some animals live on hills. But Audrina Partidge does love animals. And, as a reality television star, Audrina Partridge is also the sort of person who'd probably massacre her family if it meant she'd get a headline from it. So combine the love of animals and the compulsive attention-seeking and what do you get? That's right - a new PETA campaign where Audrina Partridge gets to strip. Not strip naked, mind you. In that respect, Audrina Partridge thinks that animals can piss off.
Audrina Partridge loves animals - her surname is a type of animal, plus she stars in The Hills and some animals live on hills. But Audrina Partidge does love animals. And, as a reality television star, Audrina Partridge is also the sort of person who'd probably massacre her family if it meant she'd get a headline from it. So combine the love of animals and the compulsive attention-seeking and what do you get? That's right - a new PETA campaign where Audrina Partridge gets to strip. Not strip naked, mind you. In that respect, Audrina Partridge thinks that animals can piss off.
Rihanna Not Having It Off With The Twonk From The Hills
These are tough times for Rihanna - now that she's dumped Chris Brown, there's nobody left to punch her in the face. But help may be at hand. Apparently Rihanna has been linked to Frankie Delgado from The Hills. It's weird - Frankie doesn't have a violent temper, a girl's voice or ridiculous dentistry, so he's definitely not Rihanna's type. Not that it matters, anyway, because Frankie Delgado has denied any romantic involvement with Rihanna. She's probably holding out for Spencer Pratt - after all, going out with turds seems to be her thing, so she may as well shoot for the moon.
These are tough times for Rihanna - now that she's dumped Chris Brown, there's nobody left to punch her in the face. But help may be at hand. Apparently Rihanna has been linked to Frankie Delgado from The Hills. It's weird - Frankie doesn't have a violent temper, a girl's voice or ridiculous dentistry, so he's definitely not Rihanna's type. Not that it matters, anyway, because Frankie Delgado has denied any romantic involvement with Rihanna. She's probably holding out for Spencer Pratt - after all, going out with turds seems to be her thing, so she may as well shoot for the moon.
Audrina Partridge Gets Burgled! On Oscar Night! Or Something!
Grief? An uneasy feeling that undesirables have been in your home? You've been watching The Hills, haven't you. Or you've been burgled. Basically the effects of either are identical. Just ask Audrina Partridge - she's in The Hills and now she's been burgled as well. Plus she has to talk to Spencer Pratt sometimes. Talk about unlucky. But more fool the burglars, because Audrina Partridge managed to catch them on camera. This basically means that they'll probably end up with their own MTV reality show. At least they've got a talent, which admittedly puts them a nose in front of Audrina.
Grief? An uneasy feeling that undesirables have been in your home? You've been watching The Hills, haven't you. Or you've been burgled. Basically the effects of either are identical. Just ask Audrina Partridge - she's in The Hills and now she's been burgled as well. Plus she has to talk to Spencer Pratt sometimes. Talk about unlucky. But more fool the burglars, because Audrina Partridge managed to catch them on camera. This basically means that they'll probably end up with their own MTV reality show. At least they've got a talent, which admittedly puts them a nose in front of Audrina.
Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt Continue To Waste Our Time
Remember when Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt from The Hills got married and everyone wondered if it was the biggest non-event in all of history? Guess what - it wasn't! According to all sorts of horribly depressing reports, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt aren't going to legally formalise their Mexican wedding! It was all a great big waste of everyone's time! But, really, Heidi and Spencer should know that fake weddings are so passe - next time they want headlines they should try something more original, like getting caught in a bear trap or developing asbestos poisoning or playing frisbee with some landmines or something.
Remember when Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt from The Hills got married and everyone wondered if it was the biggest non-event in all of history? Guess what - it wasn't! According to all sorts of horribly depressing reports, Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt aren't going to legally formalise their Mexican wedding! It was all a great big waste of everyone's time! But, really, Heidi and Spencer should know that fake weddings are so passe - next time they want headlines they should try something more original, like getting caught in a bear trap or developing asbestos poisoning or playing frisbee with some landmines or something.
Heidi Montag’s Wedding: What Do Really Minor Celebrities Think?
Now that the US election is over, it's not uncommon to find any number of pointlessly minor celebrities drifting around without purpose. Because, now that Barack Obama is president, celebrities have got nothing left to blab their relentlessly ill-considered and completely unwanted opinions about, and that makes them sad. So thank heavens for the brand-new hot-button topic that has allowed any celebrity - no matter how utterly insignificant they be - to spout on about it like they're bloody experts. We're talking about the Heidi Montag/ Spencer Pratt wedding. Now, just because you couldn't give a monkey's bum that Heidi Montag got married to Spencer Pratt, that's not going to stop luminaries like Perez Hilton, two people off The Hills and that woman who used to be married to the man who was in that plane crash that one time from gibbering on like self-regarding nobsacks about it. Guess what's after the jump. No, really. Guess.
Now that the US election is over, it's not uncommon to find any number of pointlessly minor celebrities drifting around without purpose. Because, now that Barack Obama is president, celebrities have got nothing left to blab their relentlessly ill-considered and completely unwanted opinions about, and that makes them sad. So thank heavens for the brand-new hot-button topic that has allowed any celebrity - no matter how utterly insignificant they be - to spout on about it like they're bloody experts. We're talking about the Heidi Montag/ Spencer Pratt wedding. Now, just because you couldn't give a monkey's bum that Heidi Montag got married to Spencer Pratt, that's not going to stop luminaries like Perez Hilton, two people off The Hills and that woman who used to be married to the man who was in that plane crash that one time from gibbering on like self-regarding nobsacks about it. Guess what's after the jump. No, really. Guess.
Spencer From The Hills Thinks Gay People Rock At Doing Hair And Makeup
In the old days, MTV used to show music videos that artists made to promote their new single. But now in our modern society, MTV has changed and only offers programming that really has nothing to do with music. Well, Tim Westwood does play records we guess. One of the most popular shows is The Hills. A reality show where we get to compare our own grim lives to those of some trendy twentysomething spoilt tits. Known for being a bit dim, Spencer from the show has decided to open his gob and speak about Proposition 8, the big hot topic in California at the moment. Remember, we did say he's known for being a bit dim.
In the old days, MTV used to show music videos that artists made to promote their new single. But now in our modern society, MTV has changed and only offers programming that really has nothing to do with music. Well, Tim Westwood does play records we guess. One of the most popular shows is The Hills. A reality show where we get to compare our own grim lives to those of some trendy twentysomething spoilt tits. Known for being a bit dim, Spencer from the show has decided to open his gob and speak about Proposition 8, the big hot topic in California at the moment. Remember, we did say he's known for being a bit dim.
