The sixties were all about ‘Free love’. The seventies was the age of great movie-making and music. The eighties was epitomised by consumerism and the 1990’s had er, the Tamagotchi.

Every decade becomes synonymous with a particular movement, fashion or mood. As such, the 2010’s (or ‘Teens’ as it’s known to total idiots) will henceforth be known as the ‘Decade Where People Broke Down Or Cried A Bit On Telly’. So far, we’ve had the usually stone-faced political spin doctor Alistair Campbell wobble on Andrew Marr’s BBC show and news that Gordon Brown gets emotional during his soon-to-be-televised interview with Piers Morgan. Though surely just hearing that the PM had to meet PM would have been enough to cause hysterical weeping on a grand scale.

Kicking off the ‘Teens’ – sorry, 2010’s – Cry-O-Vision trend was of course the King of Hearts himself, Peter Andre. To celebrate the upcoming ten years of televisual tears, let’s take a look back at that and some other celebrities secreting liquid from their lacrimal glands in response to emotional stress. Why? Because THAT’S ENTERTAINMENT…!

10 – Peter Andre

You’ve got to feel sorry for Andre here really, haven’t you? Cynically railroaded into getting upset by that cyborg Kay Burley. Still, consider his situation – crying on Sky News because Dwight Yorke‘s criticising you for adopting his child, while you fight a custody battle with your ex wife, Jordan. Who is now married to a martial artist transvestite. Ah, for the simpler days of Mysterious Girl…

9 – Angelina Jolie

Angelina shows her emotional side here as she, in absolutely no way tries to positively boost her public profile.

8 – Heidi Montag

Now she’s either crying in this clip or the botox is leaking. Either way, we love her here, don’t we?

7 – Ellen DeGeneres

With the experience Ellen has in being left by dogs, you might have thought that she could deal with this latest episode of canine desertion. That was a joke about Anne Heche by the way. Tee hee hee!

6 – John Terry

No list mocking celebrities would be complete at the moment without a mention of this chap, so representing the worlds of sport and adultery – here’s John Terry!

5 – Gwyneth Paltrow

There are plenty of fawning, over-the-top Oscar speech blubfests to choose from, but Chris Martin’s missus’s 1999 Best Actress acceptance is surely the most cringe-worthy of all.

4 – The Game

After being spurned by the majority of the hip-hop community for collaboration on a protest track about police brutality, The Game broke down and cried during an interview. Which is strange because we didn’t know that The Game is a girl. That’s right, Hecklerspray is dissing you, TG. Maximum disrespect.

3 – Britney Spears

Anyone suffering from an irony intolerance should beware of this clip as Britney cries to the media about being in the media too much. We all know that the real reason that she’s crying here is that she’s upset about people making fun of internet tantrum sensation Chris Crocker after all he’s been through! ‘LEAVE CHRIS ALONE!’ She’s practically screaming here.

2 – Jessica Simpson

In a staggeringly powerful moment of self-realisation, Jessica Simpson suddenly hears her own dreadful song and voice, then remembers that she slept with the massive bell-end that is John Mayer. Boo hoo indeed!

1 – Beyonce

Quite sweet actually, this one. She’s lovely, isn’t she? If anyone has her number, can you please leave it in the comments section below please? Don’t worry about Jay-Z, he’s a girl. That’s right, Hecklerspray is dissing you too, JZ. Maxi… etc.

So there you have it. Enjoy that? Yeah you’re right, it was a little depressing.

Next week: TOP 10 Genocides!

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Talk about a breakdown of civil rights – not so long ago The Game was sentenced to 60 days in jail for threatening to kill a man with his gun.

That's not where the loss of civil rights comes in though. No, that comes with the news that The Game has been released from jail after serving just eight days of his 60-day sentence.

Eight days? That means The Game had to spend about one eighth of his jail sentence actually in jail. Don't these people know who The Game is? As a celebrity, his time locked up should have been strictly capped at a twelfth of the sentence, tops. Expect a really bloody angry enquiry any day now. 

We'd hate to imagine how The Game feels at the moment. After he was sentenced to 60 days in jail for threatening to shoot a man to death during a basketball game, The Game knew that he'd get to spend Easter in Los Angeles' Twin Towers Correctional Facility – the happiest time of the year to be incarcerated thanks to the presence of Easter Barry, basically a large man wearing homemade rabbit ears who gives each inmate an egg-sized clump of shit before stabbing them in the ribs.

But now The Game has been released just eight days after he first went to prison, and that meant the only festival he got to observe was Albanian Teacher's Day – a day marked in jail by Easter Barry pushing his own shit into everyone's hands and then stabbing them. Boring! No rabbit ears or anything.

Anyway, the point is that The Game is out of jail after a piffling eight days. The San Francisco Chronicle reports:

Rapper the Game has reportedly been released from jail, just eight days into his 60-day sentence. The star, real name Jayceon Taylor, was handed the prison term in February after pleading guilty to felony gun charges… But according to TMZ.com, the Game is now a free man after being released early from the Twin Towers Correctional Facility in California on Monday.

Now, although you might think The Game would be pretty chuffed at getting out of jail 52 days earlier than he thought he would, you need to consider the implications and the conflicting feelings he'll be experiencing. Yes, he's a free man, but the justice system didn't smile as kindly on him as it did with Nicole Richie. Not only that, but by released early at all, The Game has proved himself to be less gangsta than Paris Hilton. Talk about being caught between two shitheads.

Ultimately, though, The Game's early release from jail was for the best. He now has to complete 150 hours of community service, and that will force him to actively improve his surroundings instead of just idly sitting around swapping bomb-making tips with criminals which would have happened if he'd have stayed in the slammer.

But best of all, eight days in jail was no time for The Game to pen his drearily inevitable jail album, sparing us all the agony of having to actually listen to it. Now, at worst, we only have to put up with The Game's concept EP, Eight Dayz In Tha Pound.

Read more:

The Game Released From Jail - SFGate 

If you want to play a game of basketball without worrying that a tattoo-faced rapper will threaten to kill you with a gun, now's the time to do it.

Because The Game, hip-hop's leading proponent of punching men to the ground during friendly basketball matches and then threatening to kill them with a gun, has started his 60-day jail sentence in LA.

However, it looks like The Game will get an easier ride than most other prisoners, because his jail sentence will be marked by the cushy segregation that all other celebrity inmates receive. Which is ironic, because we wouldn't be able to recognise The Game if he held a gun to our head.

OK, maybe if he held an actual gun to our head…

The Game isn't just a rapper, he's a role-model. Admittedly he'd be a bigger role-model if people had actually listened to any of his music in the last two years, but The Game should still think carefully about how his actions influence the young. Otherwise next thing you know there'll be gangs of kids all wearing masks in shopping malls and hurting policemen's feelings willy-nilly. And that way chaos lies.

But, worse, kids could copy The Game and start threatening their peers with guns during innocent sporting events. Imagine if little Timmy from across the street was arrested for pulling a glock on a six-year-old girl during the climax of a tense school sports day egg and spoon race. Because when that inevitably happens, it'll all be The Game's fault.

Substitute 'egg and spoon race' for 'basketball match' and 'six-year-old girl' for 'some bloke' and you're pretty close to imagining what The Game did last year. By getting arrested for punching a competitor in the face, running to fetch a gun from his car and then threatening to kill him, The Game got himself in more trouble than he could have ever wished for.

Last month The Game was sentenced to 60 days in jail for the incident and, on Sunday, he showed up to start his sentence, as E! Online reports:

The "How We Do" hip-hopster reported to Los Angeles' Twin Towers Correctional Facility Sunday night to begin serving a 60-day sentence after pleading no contest last month to whipping out a gun during a schoolyard pickup basketball game last February. According to TMZ, The Game will do his time in the joint in an isolated cell segregated from the general prison population.

However, as everybody knows, when a celebrity gets sent to jail in Los Angeles they never fully serve out their time. It's expected that The Game will only serve half of his sentence and will be released 30 days into his term. Sounds cushy, we know, but how would you like spending Easter, St Patrick's Day and International Women's Day locked in a cell? The Game will experience a hitherto unknown emotional challenge trying to get through that without weeping like a baby.  

But listen, now that The Game is in jail and Foxy Brown is in jail, literally the only rappers not in jail at the moment are two of the Fat Boys and MC Miker G. Literally.

Read more:

The Game Goes to Jail - E! Online 

It's a common situation – you're playing a backyard game of sport and all of a sudden you're overwhelmed with the urge to punch and pull a gun on your competitor while threatening to kill him.

Can't we all say that's happened to us at one point or another? We know we can – and those toddlers won't be asking for their marbles back in a hurry – and now so can The Game.

Rapper The Game has been sentenced to 60 days in jail for waving a gun around during a basketball match in a schoolyard. Good thing too – if The Game got away with it, this gun-based kill-threatening could have snuck into professional sports, and God knows Alan Smith is dangerous enough as it is without a six-shooter strapped to his thigh.

The Game is probably best known for having the most spectacularly ill-thought-out name in music. Google The Game and you're taken to pages about a David Fincher film, a chain of videogame stores, an American sitcom, a wrestler, a Jurassic 5 song and a book about how to trick girls into sleeping with you. That's something you don't get with, say, Lethal Bizzle.

So, knowing that he's up against all of those things, The Game has decided to get himself in the news as many times as possible. Mainly by acting like a dickwad, granted, but you can't fault him for trying. In the past The Game has been arrested for swearing in a shopping centre, for pretending to be a policeman and for giving another policeman self-esteem issues but, as you can tell, none of those things involved punching a man during a friendly sporting event and then threatening to kill him with a gun.

Fortunately, The Game realised this a year ago and did that very thing. He was then charged in June and faced a five-year jail sentence for it. However, thanks to that most gangsta of legal get-out clauses – the plea-bargain – The Game has only ended up being sentenced to 60 days in jail. E! Online reports:

The hit-making rappper has been sentenced to two months in an L.A. lockup after pleading no contest Monday to whipping out a gun during a schoolyard pickup basketball game. The 28-year-old "How We Do" hip-hopster, referred to in court by his given name, Jacyeon Terrell Taylor, worked out a deal with prosecutors to avoid up to five years in the can. In exchange for his no-contest plea on a felony count of possession of a firearm in a school zone, the district attorney's office dropped two other felony charges—making criminal threats and exhibiting a firearm in the presence of a peace officer.

As well as 60 days locked up, The Game will also have to complete 150 hours of community service, and he'll be on probation for three years – which seems like an awful long time to last for someone who once got arrested for making a policeman feel bad. 

So The Game is in jail and Foxy Brown is in jail. It seems that if this trend continues for much longer then all rappers will need to behave themselves because of their various probation orders. This will usher in a new era of gentlemanly, well-mannered hip-hop – and we've already preempted it, as our stocks of baggy tuxedos and oversized top-hats will attest.

And if Westwwod doesn't put our new banger Oh Marjory (What A Delightful Blouse) on heavy rotation by Easter, we'll be very surprised.

Read more:

Game Off—Rapper Sentenced to Jail - E! Online