Stephen Colbert is going to testify before Congress. That was a weird sentence to type. He’s doing it in character too. Weirder still. The Comedy Central host is going to go to Capitol Hill and appear before a House Judiciary subcommittee for a hearing on immigration called “Protecting America’s Harvest.”

Seriously.

Colbert is going to speak alongside United Farm Workers (UFW) President Arturo Rodriguez about illegal immigrants taking people’s jobs. In character. A comedy character. A fictional, supposed to be funny, not real, character. In Congress. WHAT?

The comic spent a day working at a farm in New York last month after Rodriguez came on his show to discuss UFW’s “Take Our Jobs” campaign, which challenges the view that illegal immigrants are taking jobs from Americans.

Apparently, during his interview, Rodriguez talked about an initiative where the UFW invited the citizens of the USA (legal residents, natch) to replace the immigrant workers.

Only three people signed up to work in the fields. Colbert became the fourth.

And so, with the world clearly spinning anti-clockwise briefly, Colbert will be expected to talk about the agriculture industry’s dependence on illegal immigrants to pick fruits and vegetables, according CBS News reported.

Colbert appeared on ABC’s Good Morning America and sarcastically said:

“Republicans are concerned that I will make light of the responsibility of governance? That I will someway impede the smooth flow of the governing of this country? I take exception with that.”

Colbert has also announced that he would rally in Washington on October 30th with fellow Comedy Central host Jon Stewart in an event called ‘The March to Keep Fear Alive.’

Watch this video and feel your brains trickle out of your ears.

Let OJ Simpson's predicament be a warning to all would-be armed robbers – it's important to increase morale in your posse-members, either by offering them better pay, more holiday time or holding regular ice cream parties for them.

OJ Simpson neglected to do any of these things when he was recruiting his rowdy gang of crooks for his alleged armed robbery of a hotel room last month, so it's no surprise that they're all quickly turning on him. It's been revealed that a third member of OJ Simpson's goon-squad has accepted a plea deal with prosecutors that will see him get a lighter punishment in return for a testimony against OJ Simpson in court – a situation that could have been easily avoided if OJ Simpson had just shown some appreciation for his supposed accomplices by remembering the date of their wedding anniversary or holding some kind of team-bonding Hot-Cha-Cha Chili Cook-Off competition for his knuckle-dragging traitorous renegade henchmen.

It could be argued that when OJ Simpson allegedly burst in on the hotel room of some sports memorabilia dealers with a gang of gun-toting heavies and held them up while bawling about how they'd literally crawled inside his rectum and burgled away his poop, he showed a lack of foresight not seen since decided to try and stab Ruby Wax in the chest with a banana on a TV show. And the armed robbery charge could see OJ Simpson spending the rest of his life in jail, making up for the cruel injustice of when he didn't go to jail forever for his part in the Naked Gun 33 1/3.

But even though OJ Simpson has been arrested for armed robbery and stung with 10 felony charges, he'll be safe so long as the men he is claimed to have recruited for the heist have even a shred of honour and dignity between them and refuse to testify against OJ Simpson in court because of a crazy little thing called loyalty. Anyway, since they've all been racing to plead guilty to lesser charges in return for testimonies against OJ Simpson, we'd say that almost certainly hasn't happened and that OJ Simpson is pretty much screwed.

After one of OJ's henchmen dropped him in the crapper by agreeing to the prosecutor's plea deal, quickly followed by another one doing exactly the same, it's no surprise that a third member of OJ Simpson's hotel-raiding hoodlums has now decided that he'd rather grass up OJ Simpson than spend over a decade in jail. Reuters reports:

Michael McClinton, 49, has reached a deal with prosecutors to testify against his co-defendants, including Simpson, in exchange for a more lenient sentence, Clark County courts spokesman Michael Sommermeyer said. "He indicated in court this morning that he would plead guilty to conspiracy to commit robbery and a robbery charge," Sommermeyer said. Sommermeyer said it was not yet clear how much prison time McClinton could face. The charges carry a maximum punishment of 11 years in prison, but he was expected to receive much less under the plea agreement.

That leaves just two remaining members of OJ Simpson's posse to come forward and agree to testify against him in court. A preliminary hearing has been set for them on November 8, which gives them little over a week to decide that they'll accept a plea deal, too. And then OJ Simpson will face the uncomfortable situation of having to hear five of his accomplices testify against him in court about an incident that an audiotape seems to confirm definitely happened.

There's only one way that OJ Simpson can wriggle out of trouble now, and that's to also testify against himself in court – by basically saying that OJ Simpson forced OJ Simpson to raid the hotel room against OJ Simpson's wishes and OJ Simpson is a terrible human who deserves to spend the rest of his lie in jail. Only then will OJ Simpson be a free man.

Read more:

Third OJ Simpson Co-Defendant To Plead Guilty – Reuters