Articles tagged with: Taylor Lautner
New Moon Premiere: Taylor Lautner Wears A Shirt For Once
It's just a matter of days until New Moon is released. What's it going to be like? Well, rubbish, obviously. But forget that. New Moon! Yay! Anticipation for New Moon is at fever pitch - nobody knows anything about it. Well, unless they've downloaded it off the internet already. Or read the book. Or read the Wikipedia page for the book. Or watched any late-night European television commercials for homosexual chat lines. But forget all that too. Because last night the New Moon premiere took place, which is important because it meant that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner all wore nice clothes. We don't have the image rights to show you the clothes. But all's not lost - we've got the next best thing.
It's just a matter of days until New Moon is released. What's it going to be like? Well, rubbish, obviously. But forget that. New Moon! Yay! Anticipation for New Moon is at fever pitch - nobody knows anything about it. Well, unless they've downloaded it off the internet already. Or read the book. Or read the Wikipedia page for the book. Or watched any late-night European television commercials for homosexual chat lines. But forget all that too. Because last night the New Moon premiere took place, which is important because it meant that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart and Taylor Lautner all wore nice clothes. We don't have the image rights to show you the clothes. But all's not lost - we've got the next best thing.
Will There Be A New Twilight Book? Um…
With New Moon being released this week, there's only one question that needs to be asked about the Twilight saga. And that's 'for the love of all that's holy, won't somebody make it stop?' Oh, and also 'now that the saga has become so depressingly popular, will Stephenie Meyer ever write another Twilight book?' That is a question that needs to be asked. It is. It is. Alright, it isn't. But Stephenie Meyer has answered it anyway. So will there be a new Twilight book? Maybe. One day. Unless she thinks of something better to do. Possibly. You're welcome Twilight fans. You're welcome.
With New Moon being released this week, there's only one question that needs to be asked about the Twilight saga. And that's 'for the love of all that's holy, won't somebody make it stop?' Oh, and also 'now that the saga has become so depressingly popular, will Stephenie Meyer ever write another Twilight book?' That is a question that needs to be asked. It is. It is. Alright, it isn't. But Stephenie Meyer has answered it anyway. So will there be a new Twilight book? Maybe. One day. Unless she thinks of something better to do. Possibly. You're welcome Twilight fans. You're welcome.
Taylor Lautner Has Brain Ache Sharing a First Name With His Girlfriend
Being a tween heartthrob doesn't require all that much brain power. It absolutely requires cheeks worthy of pinching and a personality so adorable it could make people's brains melt out of their ears. Nowhere in theTween Hunk 101 handbook does it teach you to keep any and all mental defects to yourself. Taylor Lautner is struggling. Bless his tiny movie-making cotton socks. We don't mean struggling, as in working out which trouser leg to put on first. Or even struggling to work out which blonde haired singing star is his girlfriend, out of the sea of thousands of beauties just like her. Actually - the latter is sort of what we mean. There's an identity crisis going on in teeny tiny tween land. We think we may be the only ones who can help. In a recent interview with Extra TV, Twilight Saga: New Moon actor Taylor Lautner (and all his jail bait goodness) admitted that he has a little trouble with his girlfriend, Taylor Swift.
Being a tween heartthrob doesn't require all that much brain power. It absolutely requires cheeks worthy of pinching and a personality so adorable it could make people's brains melt out of their ears. Nowhere in theTween Hunk 101 handbook does it teach you to keep any and all mental defects to yourself. Taylor Lautner is struggling. Bless his tiny movie-making cotton socks. We don't mean struggling, as in working out which trouser leg to put on first. Or even struggling to work out which blonde haired singing star is his girlfriend, out of the sea of thousands of beauties just like her. Actually - the latter is sort of what we mean. There's an identity crisis going on in teeny tiny tween land. We think we may be the only ones who can help. In a recent interview with Extra TV, Twilight Saga: New Moon actor Taylor Lautner (and all his jail bait goodness) admitted that he has a little trouble with his girlfriend, Taylor Swift.
Official: Robert Pattinson Smells Like A Binbag Full Of Dirty Nappies
Robert Pattinson has got it all. He's got incredible fame. He's got wealth. He's got moviestar good looks. He's got a stinky arse. He's got armpit odour that could blind a nun from 30 paces. He's got breath that could dissolve concrete. He's got feet that could be isolated and used as a spitefully powerful weaponised pathogen. He has. No, really, he has. Robert Pattinson has admitted to a magazine that he essentially smells like a dirty protest in a curry house. Um, Robert Pattinson? We think you'll find that slagging you off is our job, not yours. Would you like it if we starred in a number of crappy films about sparkly bad-haired effeminate vampires? No. No you wouldn't. So stop it.
Robert Pattinson has got it all. He's got incredible fame. He's got wealth. He's got moviestar good looks. He's got a stinky arse. He's got armpit odour that could blind a nun from 30 paces. He's got breath that could dissolve concrete. He's got feet that could be isolated and used as a spitefully powerful weaponised pathogen. He has. No, really, he has. Robert Pattinson has admitted to a magazine that he essentially smells like a dirty protest in a curry house. Um, Robert Pattinson? We think you'll find that slagging you off is our job, not yours. Would you like it if we starred in a number of crappy films about sparkly bad-haired effeminate vampires? No. No you wouldn't. So stop it.
Taylor Lautner Gets His Knickers In A Twist Over Taylor Swift
That's presuming that Taylor Lautner wears knickers. He might not. He doesn't really wear shirts very often. Maybe knickers are an afterthought. After all, if you wore shirts as infrequently as Taylor Lautner, you probably wouldn't concern yourself too much with the threat of splashing a bit of wee directly up the inside of your trousers, would you? Would you? No. No you wouldn't. Anyway, Taylor Lautner threw a little tantrum at a press conference on Friday when people wouldn't shut up about Taylor Swift. We should have just said that at the beginning instead of banging on about knickers, really.
That's presuming that Taylor Lautner wears knickers. He might not. He doesn't really wear shirts very often. Maybe knickers are an afterthought. After all, if you wore shirts as infrequently as Taylor Lautner, you probably wouldn't concern yourself too much with the threat of splashing a bit of wee directly up the inside of your trousers, would you? Would you? No. No you wouldn't. Anyway, Taylor Lautner threw a little tantrum at a press conference on Friday when people wouldn't shut up about Taylor Swift. We should have just said that at the beginning instead of banging on about knickers, really.
Taylor Lautner & Taylor Swift So Adorable It Makes Us Sick
This Taylor Lautner/ Taylor Swift thing is throwing up a lot of questions. Are they dating? Is it for real? Does it even matter? Why are our lives so very empty? That sort of thing. But the good news is that Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift - or Twoler, as literally nobody is calling them - seem to be getting closer to one another. They've been on dates, they've been photographed together, they've given coy interviews about each other. It looks like Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift are for real. Still, it must be hard to make time for one another, what with Taylor Lautner's New Moon coming out really soon and the album that Taylor Swift would do anything to promote and... oh, wait a minute.
This Taylor Lautner/ Taylor Swift thing is throwing up a lot of questions. Are they dating? Is it for real? Does it even matter? Why are our lives so very empty? That sort of thing. But the good news is that Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift - or Twoler, as literally nobody is calling them - seem to be getting closer to one another. They've been on dates, they've been photographed together, they've given coy interviews about each other. It looks like Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift are for real. Still, it must be hard to make time for one another, what with Taylor Lautner's New Moon coming out really soon and the album that Taylor Swift would do anything to promote and... oh, wait a minute.
Taylor Lautner Wants Everyone To Stop Staring At His Nipples
NEW MOON SPOILER ALERT: We've heard from insiders that Taylor Lautner might take his shirt off in New Moon. But tell nobody. It's a secret. If you look closely at the New Moon marketing campaign, though, you might see hints. Like the way that, say, Taylor Lautner doesn't wear a shirt in any of the New Moon trailers. Or any of the New Moon posters. Or the way that he appears to have never worn an item of clothing on his torso ever, even briefly as a joke. And this upsets Taylor Lautner. He says he wants to be remembered for his acting, not his body. And he'll prove it with his next movie, The Topless Adventures Of Captain Areola And The Greased-Up Avengers.
NEW MOON SPOILER ALERT: We've heard from insiders that Taylor Lautner might take his shirt off in New Moon. But tell nobody. It's a secret. If you look closely at the New Moon marketing campaign, though, you might see hints. Like the way that, say, Taylor Lautner doesn't wear a shirt in any of the New Moon trailers. Or any of the New Moon posters. Or the way that he appears to have never worn an item of clothing on his torso ever, even briefly as a joke. And this upsets Taylor Lautner. He says he wants to be remembered for his acting, not his body. And he'll prove it with his next movie, The Topless Adventures Of Captain Areola And The Greased-Up Avengers.
Oh For God’s Sake, It’s Another New Moon Trailer
New Moon won't be released for another month, but that's too long for us. We want New Moon to come out now! Why the sudden enthusiasm? Have we finally succumbed to the hype and decided that we'd actually enjoy New Moon? Since we're not fat little squealing 14-year-old girls, we'd have to say no. We actually want New Moon to come out now so that Summit can hurry up and start showing millions of poxy trailers for Eclipse all the bloody time instead. But until then we'll have to put with millions of New Moon trailers, the trillionth of which has just been released. After the jump!
New Moon won't be released for another month, but that's too long for us. We want New Moon to come out now! Why the sudden enthusiasm? Have we finally succumbed to the hype and decided that we'd actually enjoy New Moon? Since we're not fat little squealing 14-year-old girls, we'd have to say no. We actually want New Moon to come out now so that Summit can hurry up and start showing millions of poxy trailers for Eclipse all the bloody time instead. But until then we'll have to put with millions of New Moon trailers, the trillionth of which has just been released. After the jump!
