Former actor, soon to be convict, Wesley Snipes has said that he’s pretty nervous about going to jail. Not surprising really. Prison is horrible. It is filled with people covered in tattoos who want to stove your head in and/or bum you something rotten. And Snipes is a hot piece of celebrity ass.
With legal challenges falling flat on their face, Snipes is looking for divine intervention.
That’s right – Snipes is hoping that Jesus Christ Our Lord will come and magic this all away, despite the fact that the Holy Ghost is probably making preparations for his birthday which is a matter of days away. No rest for the blessed. Read More >>>
Remember when Wesley Snipes was an actor? Remember ‘White Men Can’t Jump’ and the Blade trilogy? They were successful weren’t they? He probably made a lot of money off the back of those films.
Sadly, Snipes didn’t fancy paying all that nasty tax that people stick on your wages, leaving him with a really boring criminal record.
Worse still is that Snipes has been ordered to start his three-year sentence for his failure to cough-up his taxes. A not-so lovely stay at a federal prison in Pennsylvania is due to start next week and there’s probably gigantic men already stroking their members in preparation for the appearance of some famous ass in the showers. Read More >>>
Now’s the time to start hoarding your special edition Passenger 57 DVDs, because you might not see Wesley Snipes again until 2011.
Now that he’s officially a convicted tax-dodger, Wesley Snipes is waiting to be told his fate, and prosecutors are urging the judge to hit him with the maximum three-year jail sentence, with a $5 million fine thrown in on top.
It sounds particularly harsh, but prosecutors want Wesley Snipes to serve the maximum punishment so it will deter any Wesley Snipes fans who think that not filing your tax returns is cool. Although we’re sure none of them think that – if Wesley Snipes has any fans at all, we’re not even sure they’d be able to spell their own names, let alone file any tax returns.
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When hecklerspray thinks of PETA, we think of the time they rushed our house and 'rescued' a boa constrictor we were keeping in several shoe boxes we'd taped end-to-end-to-end until it passed our dear old grandmother.
Thanks for that PETA. We only hope you gave her poopy bones a decent burial. Also, we're pretty sure she was holding one of our Wii controllers when the snake done ate her, so if you could sift through that stuff…
Now when Aretha Franklin thinks of PETA, she has a different experience all together. 'Tax saviors' may be the term that first comes to her mind. That's because they've just promised to pay all her back house taxes on one condition… she must kill her only child! With a cheese grater! And meat spices!
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