talk - HecklerSpray

Cloverfield 2: Coming Soon, Unless It Isn’t

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

As movie law states, a successful shaky-camera film should always be followed by a non-shaky film that everybody hates.

It happened with The Blair With Project, and now it’s probably going to be happening with Cloverfield too, so long as the director can get his act together. Almost a year after it was greenlit, Cloverfield director Matt Reeves still hasn’t made is mind up about what to do with Cloverfield 2.

Don’t get him wrong, he has ideas about Cloverfield 2, he just doesn’t know where to set it. Or who’ll star in it. Or when it’ll take place. Or what’ll happen in it. Or if he’ll direct it or not. But, seriously, once Matt Reeves has those details down, Cloverfield 2 is going to be excellent. Or rubbish. Or somewhere between those two.

Terrence Howard Cobbed Off About Iron Man 2 Replacement

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Iron Man 2 was going to be Terrence Howard’s big chance to shine, at least until he got the boot in favour of Don Cheadle.

Even now, nobody has any idea about why Terrence Howard was sacked from Iron Man 2 – not even Terrence Howard himself. In fact, Howard claims that he’s still in the dark about it all. All he knows is that he’s angry enough to wail about it to anyone close to him who happens to be holding a microphone.

Still though, Terrence Howard will get the last laugh here. After all, Iron Man 2 might be one of the biggest movies in history, but can Don Cheadle look himself in the eye and say that he’s making a rubbishy Karate Kid knock-off about street fighting that starts Channing Tatum? No. No he cannot. So in that respect, Terrence Howard wins. He loses the bits about being rich and famous and powerful, but he wins the Karate Kid bit.

Angelina Jolie Talks Babies! Also Iraq And Stuff

March 24th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

Everyone alive is sick of listening to Angelina Jolie prattle on about humanitarian issues all the time – that’s a fact.

That’s fine – a firebrand like Angelina Jolie must be used to the criticism from strangers by now – but it has to hurt when Angelina Jolie’s own unborn children start to launch violent internal attacks on her own abdominal wall just to shut her up.

Because that’s what’s happened – during a discussion about Iraqi education policy in Washington on Tuesday, Angelina Jolie was forced to talk about her own unborn twins in public for the very first time because they wouldn’t stop booting her in the gut with all their might. Heartwarming stuff, huh?

The Vaguest X-Files Sequel Talk You’ll Ever Hear

March 25th, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

The first X-Files movie left all kinds of questions unanswered – questions like 'what's going on?' 'when can I go home?' and 'is this what my life has really come to?'.

So it was always inevitable that an X-Files sequel would be on the cards. And it just so happens that one's coming out in a few months. But nobody has the foggiest clue about what it'll actually be about.

But that's where X-Files sequel director Chris Carter and screenwriter Frank Spotnitz come in. They've decided to spill the beans about the X-Files sequel without actually mentioning anything that's going to happen in it at all. Still interested? Yes? Well that's fairly depressing.