Articles tagged with: Take That
That’s about it. There’s nothing that we can add to this story apart from involuntary shuddering. Team hecklerspray likes to bond over a game of croquet and snifter of port, but not Take That. Take That like group wanking sessions. Or at least they did. Honestly. Because Take That’s fans were all twelve when they split up, it probably wasn’t best letting that sort of sordid information cripple their ears. But we're all grown up now so, yes, Take That did all used to masturbate furiously together. Happy now?
The Osbournes hosted the Brit awards last night, so the show promised to be jam-packed with enough controversy to turn your granny blue.
Is that what happened, though? No - thanks to the Brits' stringent 'don't let Ozzy Osbourne say more than three words in a row' policy, the only vaguely controversial thing the Osbournes brought to the Brit awards was the way that Sharon Osbourne's face looked as if it had been attacked by jellyfish in her sleep.
Oh, and Leona Lewis didn't win any of the four Brit awards she was nominated for. That's sort of controversial, isn't it? Anyone?
Take That, the group of four 50-year-old men who get paid to sing the soundtrack to TV ads for low-rent supermarkets - have got a lot of Brit Award nominations.
In fact, all the acts that scooped the most Brit Award nominations are just sugar-free versions of older performers. The three biggest Brit nod-getters were Mika (Freddie Mercury lite), Leona Lewis (Whitney Houston lite) and Take That (Take That lite).
But don't worry - the Brits also had something for you indie kids too. The Eagles are up for Best International Album. That's The Eagles.
Like most heterosexual males, seeing Take That in concert is not at the top of this writer's life experiences, but last week that exactly thing happened when a girlfriend situation forced us to attend their latest concert on their Beautiful World tour.
We found ourselves surrounded by thousands of women, baying for the blood of the objects of their desires. The gig began with support coming from an unnamed woman, whose talent with a saxophone and vocals proved far superior than the other supporting act; Sophie Ellis Bextor (yes, she is still trying to give this singing lark a go) who was living off past glories for duration of her set, the only song garnering any kind of crowd reaction was the 2000 summer hit Groovejet, a collaboration with that household name DJ Spiller.
After constantly denying any interest in rejoining his nemeses in Take That, it looks like Robbie Williams now may return to the group.
Robbie's biggest fan is his mum, and she spoke to the illustrious Stoke Sentinel about Robbie's Take That return. She's probably a more reliable source of information than Robbie Williams, too, because we've always got the feeling he'd say he went down on a horse if it gave him an ounce of extra publicity.
