And that calls for a change of tack. Rather than bleating on about how relentlessly misery-filled her life is all the time, Britney Spears chose her second-biggest promotional tool – an interview with Rolling Stone – to discuss the positive things in her life. Like her infant children, for example, and how they, um, can’t stop blurting out inappropriate swearwords all the time.

Needless to say, Britney Spears blames all this sudden effing and jeffing on the fact that the kids have been primarily raised by Kevin Federline. But Britney needs to look on the bright side here – at least they’re using words to communicate. That’s far more sophisticated than the system of hoots, grunts, roars and crude caveman gestures that Kevin Federline uses himself.

Britney Spears is all set to release her big shiny comeback album Circus next week, and everything’s in place. The artwork is suitably creepy, the lead single is helpfully monotonous and the entire album has been leaked onto the internet so that people can decide that they don’t like it without having to buy it first.

That just leaves one problem – the promotion of Circus. That’s just bewildering. The big push, of course, was supposed to be the Britney: For The Record documentary, but since that looks about as depressing as watching Requiem For A Dream in an abattoir at 4am with a habitual glue-sniffer, Britney Spears has chosen to do something more conventional as well – an interview with Rolling Stone.

Nothing could go wrong with that – the questions were all pre-vetted and Britney Spears would never be left alone with the reporter – unless Britney used the interview to yammer on about what filthy mouths her two- and three-year-old children have already developed. Which, oh, she did:

“They don’t look like their father at all. And it’s weird ’cause they’re starting to learn words like ’stupid,’ and Preston says the f-word now sometimes. He doesn’t get it from us. He must get it from his daddy. I say it, but not around my kids.”

Yes, that stands to reason. Kevin Federline isn’t exactly the model of respectability, is he? To be honest Sean Preston and Jayden James probably did learn some swearwords from him. But if Britney Spears had been in charge of looking after them, that wouldn’t be the case at all. Admittedly they would have probably learnt how to babble gibberish in a pretend British accent quite well. And how to have all sorts of gut-churning sex with obnoxious and clearly inappropriate photographers all the time. And their constant anguished screams would have been second to none. But at least they wouldn’t swear.

But so what? They’re just words. It’s not ideal that Britney’s kids know how to swear but, if anything, it’s something they could have done with learning even earlier in life. That way they’d have been able to convey complex thoughts like “Mummy, don’t run any more fucking red lights when we’re in the car with you,” or “Mummy, please don’t lock me in the fucking bathroom with you and scream about death until the police are called again, you silly old cuntwhistle.”

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Cunt. Jane Fonda just said 'cunt' on live TV.

Jane Fonda, lord bless her, was on the Today show this morning talking about The Vagina Monologues. And instead of saying 'fanny' or 'minge' or 'vagina' or 'tumpsy', Jane Fonda went right out and said 'cunt'. And nobody even noticed for a while. 

Video? Of course we've got video. 

Old people are so much fun. Not just because they complain about everything and sometimes fall over in the street, but because when an old person swears it is the greatest gift that this Earth has to offer. And we're in the middle of a veritable golden age of swearing oldies at the moment.

Not so long ago Diane Keaton said 'fuck' on live TV because she was so overwhelmed by another woman's lips. But that's nothing. Anyone can say 'fuck' on TV and get away with it. But 'cunt'? It takes some real balls to say 'cunt' on live TV. And Jane Fonda is the woman with those balls.

For a woman primarily famous for taking her clothes off in slow motion in space, Jane Fonda has carved out something of a niche for herself as a firebrand. Jane Fonda has shouted about George Bush, she's taken Lindsay Lohan to task for being a bit of a dick and she's mumbled apologetically about a war that happened decades ago.

But that's not what Jane Fonda will be remembered for. No. Jane Fonda will be remembered as the old lady who said 'cunt' live on the Today show. 

Oh, we've kept you in suspense for long enough – here's the Jane Fonda Cuntgate video from the Today show earlier today…

Now, although neither of the other women sitting on the sofa seemed to even bat an eyelid at jane Fonda for saying the worst word in all the world, Today host Meredith Viera quickly scarpered onscreen to be more apologetic than any human has ever been since the dawn of time:

"We were talking about The Vagina Monologues and Jane Fonda inadvertently said a word from the play that you don't say on television. It was a slip and obviously she apologizes, and so do we. We would do nothing to offend the audience. So please accept that apology."

Despite the apology, the Today show looks like it might be in for a heavy fine thanks to Jane Fonda's dirty mouth. However, perhaps some of the heat will be taken away from the incident next week when Dame Judi Dench goes on The View and tells Barbara Walters to 'fucking stick you motherfucking fuckcunt up your nose.'

Read more:

Jane Fonda Shocks Today Show with 'C-Word' – People