Michael Jackson truly was a man who kept on giving. Note the past tense: he isn't alive and living on a secret island alongside Princess Diana, 2Pac and Snoopy. However, enough people tell us that Michael Jackson will be coming back in 2057 with robotic facial surgery that gives him scorpion-like stinging powers.
We've already slipped on our sparkly glove in anticipation of this moment.
Let this not overshadow the achievements of a man that supposedly gave so much money to charity that it ruined him to the extent of needing an umbrella to protect himself from the sun and a wheelchair for basic mobility. Dr. Conrad Murray was employed to provide the singer with magical potions and drugs to keep him alive and give the impression he wasn?t stuck together with tape and staples following countless bouts of botched surgery. Countless speculations about his health overtook his once glorious music career and he's now remembered more for his wacko antics than singing, such as his baby waving incident.
Robocop was, in a way, the original plastic police officer, except he was made of metal and could actually arrest people, unlike his real life counterparts.
Michael Jackson’s dead, and there’s nothing any of us can do about it. Sure, you could moonwalk circles around what will probably be his Lincoln Monument-esque tomb, but all that’s gonna get you is a really large dead ring of grass.
