sick - HecklerSpray

Do You Want To See Some Distressing Pictures Of Macaulay Culkin?

February 10th, 2012 By Mof Gimmers

You may remember him from Home Alone and Uncle Buck, but there’s much more to?Macaulay Culkin than those two films. Actually, now you mention it, there isn’t. That’s all he’s ever done. Ever.?

Okay, that’s not really true either.

The other thing Culkin is famed for is the fact he had the temerity to grow older and develop into an increasingly less-cute thing on its hind legs. He basically went from adorable and annoying, to forgettable and hideous. HOWEVER! He’s back in the news and people are pointing at his cheek bones and gurgling at how appallingly thin he is… and yes, we’ve got the pictures.

Is Rihanna Going To Die Or Something?

December 1st, 2011 By Mof Gimmers

You may be sick of Rihanna releasing a new record every thirty seconds, but you ain’t got it so bad. Why? Well, Rihanna is sick. Properly sick. No. No sick of her releasing a record every 30 seconds. She’s actually sick-sick.

So what’s the deal then? Is she going to die?

Well, according to various reports, Rihanna has been put under 24-hour surveillance because those around her are so very, very worried about her health. Really worried. Worried she’s going to die eventually.

Terrorist Plot To Destroy The Saturdays Is Thwarted By Its Lack Of Existence

November 4th, 2011 By Kris Silver

DON?T PANIC EVERYONE! Frankie from The Saturdays has been found alive and well! Go back about your business.

The World was left in a state of shock when The Saturdays pitched up on London’s Oxford Street to turn on the Christmas lights, only to find that Frankie (the one people know the name of) wasn?t there.

It turns out that the former S Club Juniors singer was just feeling a bit poorly, so wasn?t able to join her band mates when they officially started Christmas on Tuesday evening.

Harry Potter’s Emma Watson Pukes At How Grotesquely Wealthy She Is

November 2nd, 2010 By Mof Gimmers

Are you gearing yourself up to watch Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1? A lot of you have spent a lot of money watching the films of the children’s fantasy books, making the actors on the franchise very wealthy indeed!

And now, Emma Watson wants to tell us about her riches. A few years ago, when she was 17 or 18 (aka, the time when people stopped feeling quite so guilty about the impure thoughts they’d had about her) when her dad sat her down for ‘The Chat’.

Of course, when our parents sit us down to have ‘The Chat’ with us, it usually involves condom advice… however, when you’re Emma Watson, it involves your parents telling you how puke-inducingly wealthy you’ve become.

Cloverfield: Now Making People Want To Vomit

January 25th, 2008 By Stuart Heritage

We said it about Finding Nemo and now we're saying it about Cloverfield – a film isn't really good unless it makes you want to blow chunks.

And on that basis, Cloverfield is probably the best film of all time. It's been reported that the movie is causing so much nausea in cinemas that ushers are staggering out of screening covered from head to toe in a nasty mixture of puke and semi-digested popcorn kernels. Almost.

Not because Cloverfield is gory, mind you – it's because the camera whooshes around all the time like we don't know what.

Eminem Gets Pneumonia & Goes To Hospital

March 31st, 2009 By Stuart Heritage

It's been a long time since we heard from Eminem, but in the meantime it looks like he's been keeping busy by eating cake and walking around in wet clothes.

It's been reported, you see, that Eminem went to hospital over the Christmas period because of a serious heart condition and complications from pneumonia, with sources adding that he's increased in weight to over 200 lb. Of course, this illness and massive weight-gain means that Eminem can't be called Slim Shady any more, and so he's thought to be deciding on a new name, with either Fatt Poorly or Pensioner'z Illnezz being current front-runners.