If you are a celebrity, and everything seems to be in the right place for you career-wise, the last thing you want is for PETA to come screeching in like a thousand angry bikers and start smashing things up.

That’s because in tinseltown PETA could absolutely ruin you with their opinions, their powerful organization and possibly by them printing a pamphlet about how you are the only meat any of them would ever eat – ever!

Seriously though, if there’s even a hint that you could die at the hands of self-righteous cannibals, big-name directors and producers won’t even touch you. This is all horrible news for Jessica Simpson, who recently landed on PETA’s poo-list for a t-shirt she opted to wear one day. Now her career is in shambles because of it, and she rues the day she found that pullover at Ted Nugent‘s family yard-sale.

That or she doesn’t care at all. Which ‘click for more’ closing-sentence would be more sensational?

PETA is a wonderful corporation or something where retarded people can flock to feel whole again. There the mentally deficient can feel what it’s like to ‘contribute’ to society. Also it gives them the chance to spy on celebrity wardrobes, and raise a big stink when one of the shirts they find has some meat-sauce stain clearly obtained from a Famous Dave’s.

Jessica Simpson was found out by PETA recently. One morning she woke up, put her hair in a pony tail or something and reached for a t-shirt that reads ‘Real Girls Eat Meat’ across the front of it.

Well PETA deeply disagrees with this shirt’s sentiment. They disagree to the point that they called her a ‘Stupid Girl,’ and deeply shamed her by making a blog titled “top five reasons that only stupid girls brag about eating meat.” Then they issued this statement:

“Jessica Simpson’s meaty wardrobe malfunction makes us thankful that no one is looking to her for food advice. Chicken-of-the-Sea, anyone? The woman who thought that Buffalo ‘wings’ came from buffalos would benefit from some good veggie brain food.”

That’s veggie brain food, mind you, that has to be quickly followed by numerous vitamin supplements because a non-meat diet is insufficient to sustain a life. Fox News has a Simpson-based retort:

“Simpson family insiders reportedly told OK! magazine that the shirt is a dig at her boyfriend Tony Romo’s ex-girlfriend, country superstar Carrie Underwood — who doesn’t eat meat. PETA twice has named Underwood the “World’s Sexiest Vegetarian.”

So will Simpson repent of her vile ways, give up all meat and meat-related accessories? Why should she? Did Britney Spears take them up on that internship? Did Aretha Franklin allow them to pay her taxes? Did Leona Lewis get naked for them?

Well yes, apparently, to that last one. Still – you can see where we were going with that.

To read more see ‘Jessica Simpson Slammed By PETA Over ‘Meat’ T-Shirt’ on eFlux Media