People, get ready for four full months of nerve-shredding anticipation – the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame inductees have been announced.

And are we ever excited. In just 79 short days we’ll get to see the likes of Run-DMC, Metallica and Bobby Womac get inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame – literally the place to be if you’re a fan of both brain-aching corporate bureaucracy and the sight of people old enough to be your grandparents unironically dressed up like teenagers and looking a bit confused.

We can’t wait. We literally can’t wait. Oh, no, our mistake. We can wait. Sorry.

The thing we love most of all about the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame – even more than watching a handful of creatively-spent old men who all hated each other for decades being forced together for the sake of an ultimately meaningless award – is the show’s process.

We’re being serious. The voting and presentation of the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame has been specifically designed to maximise the public’s excitement. First comes the incredibly long voting procedure, followed by a big announcement of some of the bands who might make it into the hall. Then, just four short months later, the inductees are finally announced. And then, just four short months later, there’s the induction show itself. Whew! Talk about whistlestop!

So hold onto your hats, everyone, because we’ve just reached the blistering middle stage of the process. The 2009 inductees for the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame have just been announced, and there’s only a third of a titting year to wait until anyone does anything about it.

So, then, the names of the bands to be inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame this year – which you’re instantly going to forget anyway so there’s not really much point – are Run-DMC, Metallica, Bobby Womac Little Anthony And The Imperials, Wanda Jackson, Bill Black, DJ Fontana and Spooner Oldham.

Luckily, it seems like all the inductees realise that what they’re being inducted into is basically just a showy circlejerk for music industry insiders and that none of it really matters, as Metallica drummer Lars Ulrich told Newsday:

“[It shows] we are part of the big picture. We are a link in a chain of everyone that’s come before and everyone that’s come after you. I love how it all fits together.”

OK, so maybe not all of the inductees realised that none of it really matters. But, credit where it’s due, Metallica are a link in chain of everyone that’s come before and everyone that’s come after. They’re quite an obvious link, too, because all the links before them are quite good and the link at the other end of the chain is Fred Durst. They must be so proud.

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It’s our favourite time of the year – the time when the shortlisted nominees for next year’s induction to the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame are announced.

Why is it our favourite time of the year? Because we know that from hereon in, it’s going to be a whistlestop pedal-to-the-metal seven-month funride until the bands eventually chosen to go into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame get properly inducted. Seven months. Seven poxy months that we’ll never get back. Fun.

So who could be going into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame next year? Why only Run-DMC, Metallica, The Stooges, Jeff Beck, Wanda Jackson, Chic, Little Anthony And The Imperials, Bobby Womack and War. That’s War the concept of organised military disputes between feuding nations and not War the 1970s jazz-funk fusion band responsible for hits like Why Can’t We Be Friends, by the way. That struck us as weird, too.

Of all the different ways that the Rock And Roll Hall Of fame can make you angry – like the awkwardness of reuniting bands or the desperately bad musical tributes or the inescapable fact that none of it actually matters in the slightest – we think we’ve found a new one.

It’s exactly the same every year. Every year Chic get nominated for the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame, and every year The Stooges get nominated for the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame and every year neither of them do because of the long-winded and confusing multi-stage voting process. Do you know what it’s like knowing that you’ve got to write exactly the same thing about Chic and The Stooges every year? Do you? It’s bloody awful.

However, this year we’ve got our fingers crossed really tight for both The Stooges and Chic get inducted into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame. We think they will, as well, because most of the other nominees this year are crap. But first we’ve got to wade through seven months of bureaucratic nonsense. Reports Reuters:

Artists become eligible for the Hall of Fame 25 years after the release of their first single or album and are represented in an exhibition at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum in Cleveland, Ohio. More than 500 music industry professionals will choose five of the nominees for the 24th annual induction on April 4 in Cleveland. The inductees will be announced in January.

So who’s been nominated for induction into the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame? Here’s our rundown.

Run-DMC - Rappers responsible for hits like Walk This Way. DMC actually stands for Dog Muck Clodge, after the time that Reverend Run once made a fanny out of some dogshit.

Metallica – Heavy metal group responsible for hits like Enter Sandman. Now more famous for their film Some Kind Of Monster where they all sat in a circle, wanked each other off and then cleaned bugs out of each other’s fur with their fingers than for their music.

Bobbie Womack – Responsible for hits like Let Me Kiss It Where It Hurts. Legally changed his name to Bobbie Womack from the original Boobie Woman in 1974.

Jeff Beck – Responsible for hits like Rock My Plimsoul. Actually invented the guitar – before him, people just used tennis raquets and their own mouths.

Chic – Responsible for hits like Freak Out and Good Times. One of the most influential bands in history, Chic’s fingerprints can be felt all over everything from No Surprises by Radiohead to Here Comes The Bride.

Wanda Jackson – Responsible for hits like Funnel Of Love. Having studied at RADA, Jackson’s first achieved fame with her role in Ken Russell‘s Women In Love before becoming a household name with her portrayal of Queen Elizabeth I of England in the BBC’s 1971 blockbuster serial, Elizabeth R. Now a Labour backbencher representing Hampstead and Highgate.

Little Anthony And The Imperials – Responsible for hits like Shimmy, Shimmy Ko-Ko-Bop. Named ironically, since the band were all medieval peasants and Little Anthony was actually Megatron from Transformers.

The Stooges – Responsible for hits like Search And Destroy. Recently reformed, The Stooges now play concerts exclusively at wakes and pet bar mitzvahs.

War - Responsible for hits like Spill The Wine. One of War’s songs was performed at the end of Lethal Weapon 4. For allowing this to happen, everyone in War is legally a twat.

You’re welcome.