Articles tagged with: Ricky Wilson
Ricky Wilson, AKA King of the Dicks, has declared that his band, Kaiser Chiefs, are ‘the band that most music fans would see as their (Oasis’) successor’. Now, this makes him a prick for a number of reasons: 1) It’s obviously bull-shit. 2) Who does he mean when he says ‘most music fans’? Have you ever met anyone who isn’t a fan of music? Everyone who ever existed is a fan of music and hecklerspray knows a few of them: not one has ever claimed Kaiser Chiefs are the successors of Oasis. Only Ricky. 3) He’s obviously only doing it in the vain hope that Noel will retaliate, on the off-chance it could turn into a war like the Blur/Oasis feud of old, like he tried to start with the Arctic Monkeys, which of course failed spectacularly, what with Kaiser Chiefs not being fit to lick either of their comparatively Messianic assholes.
Ricky Wilson’s tiny little mind is hurting today. It turns out Kaiser Chiefs infant-school anthem Ruby has been overlooked for a Brit award.
The band had made the shortlist for the Best Single prize but, in an act that has reaffirmed hecklerspray’s faith in democracy, Ruby did not make it into the final five, all thanks to a vote amongst the Great British public.
The Hoosiers, Mark Ronson, Mika, Take That and Leona Lewis will all be battling it out in Kaiser Chief's absence - meanwhile the band be sitting around listening to I Predict A Riot and trying to rearrange the chords in a not too dissimilar order, whilst deciding whether "na na na na na" or perhaps "ah ah ah ah ah" suits the new song they’ve just created before repeating the process eleven times, having the gall to call it an album, then wondering why the entirety of healthy-minded humans, as well as the people behind the Brit awards, disregard it as a total waste of theirs and our own existence.
