Like many people, we can only achieve climax from pornography if rap stars edit footage of themselves into it.
We should be more specific. We can only achieve climax from pornography if the edited rap star footage shows them wearing a purple fur coat and giant curly wig. And if they include a voiceover that involves them screeching incomprehensibly in a sort of weird high-pitched Skeletor voice during the actual pornography, then we’re basically in ejaculation city, baby.
Luckily, 50 Cent appears to have made that exact thing, for reasons that only he could explain. However, the woman in the sex tape has now sued 50 Cent for emotional distress. Which is weird, because now that we’ve seen 50 cent in a purple coat and a curly wig doing an indecipherable voiceover to a sex tape, we imagine we deserve quite a large lump sum as well.
