It was an age of moralising without snobbery, with heroes you wanted to be and leading men you wished you could just hug and say ‘thank you’ to.

Paul Newman is a man from that age, and to this day he carries on being a shining example to the world of Hollywood as to what makes a man.

Newman doesn’t bother hyping himself up to be our new saviour – he eschews the limelight that could so easily surround his incredible array of charity works and instead focuses on, well, raising the money. Not constantly appearing on TV to tell us all that he’s raising money – the man just goes out there and does it, managing to make some damn fine marinades for your chicken in the process.

Not like those modern day ponces who skip around from chat show to radio discussion, elaborating to anyone who cares (clue: no one) on how they aim to change the world, that China may not have a great human rights record and generally patronising all with the combination of ears and the ability to understand language.

Nor does he take his time being clinically insane, leaping about the place, alienating fans and generally being a grade ‘A’ berk. The man may subscribe to a religion, he may not, but he certainly doesn’t jog around from port to port cramming his beliefs down anyone’s throat.

What a guy.

Paul Newman inhabits the same echelon of existence saved for members of the human race who are just great, above all reproach and come across as thoroughly nice people – like Gregory Peck, for example. The kind of people that even we at hecklerspray towers find it hard to take issue with.

But unlike the Pecker, Newman isn’t dead. And if his latest statement about his health is anything to go on, the 83-year-old won’t be for a while. Speaking to journalists through his spokesperson, the following factoid was revealed:

“Newman says he’s doing nicely.”

Granted, this does nothing to quell the rumours that the retired actor is gravely ill with cancer, but if Paul says he’s doing great, hecklerspray believes him.

If one of the manliest men that has ever existed tells you he’s okay – even if it’s through a third party – then he’s okay. Stop the speculation and just hope the alleged lung cancer isn’t true; we’ve had enough life-threatening cancer for this year, thanks.

To be fair though, cancer clearly wouldn’t stand a chance against Newman. He’d crack a pool cue over that fucker’s back.

But not for much longer, because last night Michael Parkinson recorded his last ever celebrity interviews before fades away into a retirement of autobiography-writing and complaining about how rude young people are. And it's even been reported that professional northerner Michael Parkinson even got a bit teary-eyed during the filming of his last show. That's something we're either putting down to Parkinson realising what a prolific and generous interviewer he's been over the last three and a half decades or because Jamie Cullum turned up and started singing bad jazz-pop at him. We're going to go with the second one.

Michael Parkinson has interviewed all the big names in his time as television's most famous celebrity interviewer. Orson Welles, Muhammad Ali, Patrick Kielty – at one point or another they've all been exposed to Michael Parkinson's legendary interview technique that consists of making a noise like a half-dead washing machine and then twinkling his famous twinkly eyes in the mistaken belief that it's flirtatious, when actually we get the impression that the effect is most like the time your Nan fell face-first into the biscuits and forgot where she was.

Well, you can kiss that interview technique goodbye, because last night Michael Parkinson filmed his last-ever interviews. That wasn't particularly surprising – Michael Parkinson announced his retirement back in June – but nevertheless, filming them proved to be a moving task for Parkinson. And that's really saying something, since the last recorded time that Michael Parkinson showed any emotion was the first time he ever crapped himself as a baby. At the very end of filming, Michael Parkinson is reported to have welled up while telling the audience:

“I was told to pick a wish list and I put down these names and every single one of them is here… Over the years it has been a privilege to meet some of the most intelligent and interesting people. It has always been a great joy and I shall miss it.”

And this wish list of perfect Parkinson interviewees included Billy Connolly, Michael Caine, David Attenborough, Judi Dench, Dame Edna, David Beckham, Jamie Cullum and Peter Kay, with Dench apparently singing an amusing song about Meg Ryan to the host and Kay dressing him up as a lollipop man, presumably before making up a hilarious off-the-cuff hour-long routine that started with "Do you remember lollipop men? Do you? Lollipop men? 'Son, don't cross the road until I do, I'm the lollipop man'. Lollipop Men! Do you remember the sticks that lollipop men carried? What were all that about?" 

The final Parkinson – actually the penultimate Parkinson, since there's also a one-off lifetime retrospective episode to come – will be broadcast on December 15, but you'll probably only be able to stand about five minutes of the stilted, slightly self-satisfied conversation before switching channels just like every other time that you've tried to watch Parkinson lately.